This is an escalation story, with a slow start and split over several brief chapters.
It's about a married neighbour repaying a debt and learning something new about herself in the process.
Chapter 1
It started with a cricket ball and ended with having a ball.
It was a Saturday morning in early June when I left my house to get some shopping done. My neighbours Jim and Mary were in their garden with their son playing some game. Waving acknowledgement to them, nobody had any time for Jim. He was self-opinionated, self-centred and full of himself. Mary, on the other hand, was OK, a little meek and mild, but pleasant enough.
Then I spotted it, almost before it happened. Mary tossed a cricket ball towards her son. He took a mighty swing with his bat and it made a satisfying whack of willow on leather. Followed almost instantly with the sound of shattering glass as the ball passes through the passenger window of my Mercedes.
Everyone seems to freeze in shock until Jim bursts out laughing.
"What the fuck!" I exclaim.
"Language!" Mary replies and rushes to cover her son's ears.
Somehow, I managed to contain myself, although I felt like I was going to explode.
"What were you thinking? Letting your son play cricket out here?"
"I'm sorry." The boy stammers.
"I know, and I know it was an accident. However, your parents should know better, and it's their responsibility to pay for it."
"Get stuffed!" Jim interjects, still amused. "Stick it on your car insurance."
"Not a chance!" I reply. "I have witnesses." Nodding to the neighbours watching us. One lady particularly dislikes Jim for being noisy too early or too late in the day.
Opening the car door, the entire front seats are covered with broken glass. The cricket ball resting on the driver's seat. Taking it, I toss it back to the boy.
"Keep the cricket in the park ok?" He nods and runs back into his house.
Unable to face cleaning up the mess right now, I storm back into the house, too angry to trust myself.
Ten minutes later, I was flicking through websites looking for someone to fix the window when the doorbell goes.
It's Jim trying to be conciliatory.
"You're right, we probably should have been more careful. How about £100 to make this go away?"
"Forget it; the best price I've found so far is over £500."
"Fuck off, that's robbery."
"Here..." I showed him the phone.
"Christ! But you don't have to fit the official stuff."
"I do if I want to trade it in. So are you going to come up with the rest of the cash?"
"No chance. You can whistle for it." He hands the phone back and turns to go.
"OK, I'll see you in court. I have witnesses and then you'll have court costs and legal fees on top of it. Oh! And I want your stuff out of my garage by the end of the day."
"What? You can't do that."
"Why? I offered you temporary use of the garage after that flood." I didn't point out the flood was caused by his own faulty DIY when he had water gushing through the ceiling.
"You've been abusing my generosity for 18 months, so my patience has finally gone." He glares at me and slams the door as he goes.
"And fuck you too!" I mutter after him.
I'd just got off the phone with the garage to arrange for someone to deal with the car when the bell went again. This time it was Mary.
"Can I come in?" I nod and return to the kitchen with her following. "I'm sorry about Jim..."
"He's his own worst enemy, you know." I interrupt.
"I know. It's just sometimes he seems to forget he's not always right. We'll pay for the full cost of the window. It's just money is a little tight right now. Could I pay you £20 per week?" I knew Mary had a part-time job.
"Even without interest, that is nearly six months I'm out of pocket. And what's stopping you simply stopping paying after a month?"
"Because it will come out of my pocket and not Jim's. After all, I threw the ball."
I wasn't happy with this, mostly as it was Jim who had pissed me off. However, if I took them to court, it would take longer to get a judgement, and they'd probably allow him to pay slowly. My delay in replying prompts Mary to up her offer.
"How about I do your cleaning as well?" As a single man in my early thirties, I keep my house fairly tidy, but not necessarily that clean. Glancing around the kitchen, I could see splashes of food behind the hob and I couldn't remember when I'd last cleaned the cooker.
"Fine, but it's in addition to the £20 per week. Come around next Saturday morning OK?" She nods, thanks to me and leaves.
I'd delayed her starting, as I wanted to make sure I'd tidied away any porn. After a while of being single, you don't always ensure your home is mixed company friendly all the time.
At 9 am on Saturday, Mary rings the bell and I'm grumbling under my breath. I suppose for a married mum of a kid under ten, 9 am is reasonable, but for me, it feels like the dawn.
"Want a coffee?" I ask as she hangs up her coat and she nods.
"Black, no sugar."
As the kettle boils, Mary comes into the kitchen.
"We never spoke about how much this cleaning pays. Jim says it should be £25 per hour."
"Fuck off!" I exclaim in shock. She looks instantly offended.
"Sorry, what I mean is that's ridiculous." Opening my laptop and a quick search shows £10 is more reasonable.
"You have no travelling expenses and I'm providing the materials. £10 is far more reasonable. Where the heck did Jim get £25 from?"
Mary looks chagrined and shrugs.
"I'll start in the bathroom. I doubt a single man like you has cleaned behind the 'U' bend in years."
"'U' bend? What's that?" I quipped. In truth, I barely did more than a wipe over the surface most of the time.
Typing in £25 and cleaner in my search engine, I waited for a second and grinned at the results. The first result is a company offering cleaners dressing in sexy costumes like French maids. It looks like my neighbour was looking at things I doubt his wife would appreciate.
I wonder how she'd react if I agreed to pay the £25. On the proviso, she wore a sexy costume?
With her coffee in hand, I enter the bathroom and look around confused, and then I spot her shoes next to the shower. Looking inside she's standing barefoot inside squirting some cleaner with one hand and using a scrubbing brush on the grout.
Suddenly the image of her naked in my shower fills my mind. Which is a shock, as I'd never really thought of Mary that way. Putting the coffee next to the sink, I left her to it and returned to the kitchen to ponder why I'd been thinking about Mary sexually.
It could be my lengthy absence of female companionship or that Mary is the first woman in my home in over a year. Or perhaps it was just the thought of her wearing the maid outfit from the website her husband had been perusing.
After three hours of cleaning, Mary had done over half of the house. The kitchen and bathroom take the longest. I made a note of her hours on a spreadsheet as she was about to leave and joked I'd have her 'uniform' for her next week. I nodded to the laptop showing the 'French maid' cleaning service. She shook her head with the 'boys will be boys' look.
Chapter 2 - Maid
After Mary left, I found myself thinking about her differently, she'd been just a neighbour, now I was thinking of her as a woman. And an attractive one at that.
Memories of her hanging out her washing. With her t-shirt pulled tight against her tits. Which were larger than her usual baggy and conservative clothing gave a hint of. Her jeans hugging her bum snugly had raised my interest at the time, but I'd let the memories fade.
Saturday night I had a bit too much to drink and woke on Sunday with a thick head and a tinge of worry to find my laptop open out on the coffee table in the lounge. I usually make sure to keep it out of the lounge at night to avoid late-night drunken purchases.
My email showed I'd placed an order with a company I didn't know and following the link, I suddenly recalled some of it. It was a French maid outfit.
'Damn it' I swore out loud. I'd been thinking about Mary, her cleaning, and my joke about her in such a costume. I'd clicked on some porn featuring women in French maid outfits. Then I went into several fancy dress costumes websites to look for one.
The drunken idea formed that if I bought one that was sexy, but not just some lacy thing just for sex, I could get her to wear it. Or at least get a laugh out of it. The joke turned sour as I noticed a second email confirming dispatch and I finally saw the price. £50 was a bit much for a joke that was likely to fall flat on its face.
Not being able to send it back, I took it as a message to be more careful about drunk shopping. I also took the time to check out the uniform properly. It was sexy, but you could wear it in company, provided it was company you were comfortable with. A black flouncy skirt, short, but not quite indecent.