Peggy's Diary: Excerpt 04

Excerpts from the Diary of Peggy Douglas

In which she comes to recognize her exhibitionist tendencies and becomes a nude model.

Eighteen year old, home schooled Peggy has been keeping a diary since she was 8. In previous excerpts she has become sexually active and noticed her sexual feelings when nude in front of others.

Nov 30

I saw Eva on campus today. I caught up to her to say hi and thank her for her help with losing my virginity to Ron and with the Houcks. I thought she was probably there to meet Ron but it turns out she was doing some nude modelling for an art class. I don't know what's with me but it sounded exciting and I asked her about it. She claimed it was pretty dull. Just standing there while the students drew or painted or sculpted. She said the hard part was holding the position, especially her arms. She did say it paid pretty well for doing almost nothing.

I thought maybe I'd like to try it and since I had some free time asked if I could tag along and watch. She told me it would be up to the instructor. We talked on the way over to the art building and she said she did a lot of modelling for artists not just at the school. I asked if the private modelling involved sex and she, hesitantly, said no. That seemed almost disappointing to me, diary, but her hesitation made me question her honesty on the subject.

I told her how I had enjoyed stripping in front of Earl and said that stripping sounded exciting and then asked about her experiences at the strip club amateur nights. She admitted to being an exhibitionist and seemed to feel a lot like I did about being naked in front of guys, she said, "women too." I'm not sure I care that much about being naked in front of girls. I asked her about sex at the strip clubs and she said they don't allow it but that she could pick up guys there. She said she never did and recommended against it, "You never know about the guys at the strip clubs.

When she introduced me to the instructor he said that if I was interested in modelling for his classes I could watch. But you know what? He called me a "classic beauty." He was very complimentary and said he'd love to have me pose for some classic sculpting he was going to have in two weeks. He said that he'd be doing some modern figure interpretation later and that he'd been looking for a model with "classic curves". It was all very flattering. He did ask if I'd be willing to show him my body and I did. He didn't touch or anything but just looked. He was very, I mean

VERY

, complimentary. Said it would be wonderful if I'd agree and gave me a release form to return. He wanted them back pretty quickly so he could get someone else if I declined.

Watching Eva model did look pretty boring, except for the part that there were over a dozen students looking diligently at her nude body while she stood there with a sheet draped over her arms. I fantasized about being there myself. Why does this stuff seems so exciting to me? She said she has to come back for two more sessions to allow the students time to complete their paintings. She said that private artists or groups would usually have her for one long session, with breaks.

The release was three documents. the one I needed to sign had a lot of stuff about the school having the right to display "representations" of me and how I'd have the ability to decide whether students could retain their individual creations after the school year. I had to say that I had read and understood the student release form that was another of the documents. It talked about what the students could do with their art work and gave the model some control. It also said the students could not fraternize with the models for at least 6 months after the end of the class. The third document was some general rules for the art department. My document said I had read, understood and agreed to comply with them.

Dec 1

I've been reluctant to tell mom about my fascination with being nude in front of guys, but I decided I had to get her advice on this modelling thing and the release form. I was sure she'd discourage the idea and she did.

I thanked her for her opinion and told her I might decide to do it anyway so she looked at the release. She said it looked okay and pointed out the ways in which graphic portrayals of genitals were discouraged and the rights it gave me to object to any depictions I didn't like. She told me I had the right to look at every picture and insisted that I look at them all and tell the instructor about my objections. And, of course, she took every opportunity to tell me I shouldn't do it.

Dec 2

I took the signed release to the art instructor and he told me he had a class in two weeks that he'd like me to model for. He said I'd be completely nude and wanted to be sure I'd be okay with that. There will be three sessions for the students to finish their work. I'm eager to do it.

Dec 15

Tomorrow is my nude modelling. I've got tingles all over thinking about it. I haven't told mom, only that I'm studying late at school tomorrow.

Dec 16

I've felt like giggling all evening. The nude modelling was a real turn on. There were three other girls there, all older than me and I had to stand in the middle and they knelt around me. It was supposed to be like a goddess (me, as a goddess, isn't that a laugh) and her handmaids. It wasn't easy standing real still and it was a little chilly but I got a break every few minutes. I was supposed to just stare into space but I couldn't help looking around. There were about a dozen art students. One was a guy I've seen in my world history class.

Afterward the instructor asked if I could come to some evening sessions. I guess he has short sessions with just a few students to go over what they are doing and he likes to have one of the models at each session. Anyway I'll be doing that next week. Oh. I looked at some of the work. I look really good in all of them and none of them are at all explicit, though a couple show my pubic hair.

And the instructor called me a "classic beauty" again. Isn't that a kick?

Dec 19

Oh my, diary! There were only three students at the special session one guy and two girls. It wasn't like the class at all. It was in a small conference room and I was on the table. I got undressed and then did poses on the table. The instructor pointed out parts of my body and the students sketched them in detail. They were so close and I could see exactly what they were drawing.

Like their sketch pads filled most of the page with my breast, showing every bump of my aureoles and the little dimple in my nipple. They did my ear and my lips and my hand and my toes and my elbow and even my genitals, hair and protruding labia and clitoris. I was so turned on that it was a shiny ball peeking out.

I thought maybe those violated the part of the contract about graphic portrayal of genitals and asked the instructor about it. He pointed out that the contract allowed it if it showed only the genitals and not anything that. might be used to identify the model. "If models have genital tattoos or piercings the artists can't show them. He noted a part that allowed the identifying "portrayal" if the model gave her explicit permission, "The artist has to ask you first." He also reminded me that I have the right to reject any portrayal of anything and asked whether I had minded them being so intimate. I was honest, telling him I loved it.

Dec 22

Christmas break and plenty of time to think.

This nude modelling is both exciting and very boring but being naked in front of the student artists really has me thinking about stripping.

I imagine the guys at a strip club to be much more sexually excited than the artists. Why is that so much more attractive to me?

I called that girl Sarah today. The one that's a stripper that I called about Ron (that seems so long ago). Anyway, she suggested I come to the strip club to see what the dancers do. I gotta admit, I'm curious, but don't know about doing that. She told me she'd meet me outside the club.

Dec 27

What an afternoon! I went to the strip club. It's a pretty seedy looking place, inside and out. The nicest thing about the whole place is that huge lavender "Nude Girls" sign with letters you can see for a mile from the freeway. Parking lot is dirt. Building is wood siding that looks like it's needed a paint job for a couple of decades. The inside is dark, except for the lighted stage with two metal poles, so it's hard to see but I had the impression of worn upholstery and carpet.

Sarah met me inside the door and right away took me to another door and up some stairs so I didn't get a close look at the interior. We went to a large room that looked very nice when she turned on the lights. She dimmed the lights and one side of the room was a window looking down at the stage. She told me I could get a good view of the dancers and customers from there and "wouldn't be disturbed." I sat in one of the plush and comfortable swivel chairs near the window and watched as she went down.

The sign said "nude" and it was right. The girls danced on the stage to music, usually seeming pretty bored but some really had a workout, spinning on the poles and smiling at the customers. They wore bikini type outfits, some being just underwear and danced two dances each time they got on stage. They would usually get topless sometime in the first dance and then drop their bottoms in the second dance. They would flash their genitals at the guys sitting around the stage, sometimes getting so close that I bet the guys could smell them. One dancer actually seemed to rub her crotch in a guy's face!

Speaking of the guys. There looked to be about a dozen in the building. Three of them sat right at the edge of the stage and would put money on the stage for the dancers who would usually respond by showing them their body more closely. I couldn't tell whether the bills were 1's, 5's, 20's, or different amounts. I guess that made a difference as to whether the dancer might rub her breasts in the guys face (once a dancer pulled a guy's hands to squeeze her big breasts after he threw a bill on stage) and it must have been a big bill that guy threw out to get her crotch in his face.

The girls would walk around the place and stop to sit and talk with the guys. Sometimes they would get up and go somewhere under where I was sitting. When I left, I asked Sarah about that and she said they had private rooms where the girls would get topless or naked and dance for the guys. She said "lap dances" which involved sitting on the guy's lap and rubbing against his penis and sometimes more. I experienced some of the "more" myself, although at the time I assumed it was a special case.

About that - If mom ever hears about this she'll ban me from the strip club for life! Not that she'd ever approve of me being there.

Sarah said I "wouldn't be disturbed." Well, she was wrong, and how!

While I was sitting there, suddenly the lights were brightened and some overweight guy with a skinny dancer was standing in the doorway. He says, gruffly, "Who are you and what are you doing here?"

I was scared and could only say that Sarah had told me it would be okay. Then guy said he didn't know any Sarah and went to a phone on the wall. He says, "Tell Carl to come up here, we have a problem." The skinny dancer just stood there looking at me.

Then this dumpy looking guy comes up, "What's the problem," he says. and the big guy points at me.

I was scared and ready to cry.

The dumpy looking guy repeats what the big guy asked, "What are you doing here?" and I manage to sob out that Sarah said it would be okay and the big guy says, again, "Who is this Sarah?"

The dumpy guy gets on the phone and says, "Tell Astrid to come up here, immediately. Get her out of the VIP if necessary."

He sees I'm starting to cry and is kind of nice, telling me I'm not in trouble. But the big guy mumbles something about someone ought to be and the dumpy guy says he's sure he can do something to make up for it. He nods to the skinny girl who takes the big guy to a couch and pulls out his penis. Honestly diary, that's what she did, just unbuckles him, unzips him and pulls out his penis and starts rubbing and sucking on it.

And she looks over at me and makes some head gestures. I know what she means and understand. I'm reluctant but guess at her reasoning. I go over and she lets me start stroking and sucking at his penis. It's hard as a rock. Harder than Ron's gets. It's so thick it barely fits in my mouth. He pulls my head close to get as much of it in as he can. It's maybe seven inches long and almost caused me to vomit.

The guy smiles at me and sort of nods at the dumpy guy. The dumpy guy makes some gestures to the skinny girl. The implication is clear and she gets up on this platform in front of the couch and uses some light switches at the side to brightly light the little stage. She begins dancing and takes off her bra. The guy reaches inside my blouse and bra and feels me up. I decide it's best not to object.

The guy growls at the dancer, "Windy, sweetie, let me have a feel."

She comes down and lets him massage her breasts. I keep sucking at his penis and Sarah comes in.

Sarah talks a little bit with the dumpy guy and then comes over to tell me to get up. She leads me to the dumpy guy. The skinny girl takes over the big guy's penis. Then this older woman who looks a lot like Sarah comes in. The dumpy guy calls her "Valkyrie" but I can tell she's Sarah's mom.

It turns out the dumpy guy is the owner and manager of the place and the big guy is a police captain on the vice squad and he gets to use the room to get private shows with the girls as kind of a payment to not be too fussy about what goes on in the place. Apparently Sarah's mom (who dances under the name "Valkyrie") arranged for Sarah (who dances under the name "Astrid") to let me use the room. What they didn't do is clear the time when I would be there and so "Captain" came up while I was there. There was no doubt "Captain" had priority and he was willing to forgive everything but wanted a second dancer besides "Windy" (the skinny girl) to make up for it.

Both "Valkyrie" and "Astrid" were acceptable but he kept staring at me in a way that made it clear he really wanted me. I said I'd do it, but Sarah's mom held up her palm to "Captain" and took me aside.

She asked me if I knew what I was agreeing to. I said, "sure he wants me to dance naked for him."

I was thinking the idea was exciting. But she corrected me and said that was only part of it. He expected whoever stayed to let him fuck her. I was shocked but realized I shouldn't have been. After all I'd already been sucking on his penis. Diary, I'm ashamed to say, shocked or not, the idea sent a thrill through my body. A sort of chilling and scary thrill, but still a clearly sexually exciting thrill.

Sitting here after and writing to you, I'm surprised that I agreed to do it. But I remember that feeling and the continuing similar feeling I had while I did what Captain demanded of me. It was new, and exciting, and scary, and exhilarating. I feel the thrill in my genitals even now as I write.

I was thinking I'd just tell you I danced and undressed, and, yes let Captain fuck me. But the whole thing was so bizarre and surreal. There I was with this guy I'd never seen before and barely knew and this skinny girl I'd also never seen before and didn't know. I didn't even know his, or her, real names. Anyway Captain told us to undress him and we did, he was so hairy. Back, front, legs, arms. hair everywhere, except his hard, thick penis that stuck seven or eight inches inches out from a mass of hair at his crotch. Then he told Windy to play some music for me. He told me to get on the stage and strip. I did, the music was a bit fast for me but I did my best.

While I slowly took off my clothes while making swings around the pole he pulled down Windy's panties and then picked her up, seemingly by the breasts, and put her on his lap. He did some adjusting and I watched his penis disappear into the fleshy labia between her spread legs. I don't know why, diary, but that was really erotic. He was stroking Windy's breasts and clit, rotating her so she was sideways on the couch and I felt like his hands were touching me. I took off everything except my panties, feeling like I was the exact opposite of Windy, she so skinny and me chubby, if not fat.

Captain says, "You are a fleshy one. Sometimes I like 'em thin (he gave Windy a kiss) but a little bit of flesh is nice too. Come here. What's your name?"

There you have it, diary, here I was down to my panties with a guy I knew only as a police captain and he didn't know my name. I realized that none of the strippers used their real names so I made one up. I wanted something flowery, and that made me think of a garden and I said, "Gardenia".

"Gardenia," he says, "that's a mouthful." Well, I decided that it maybe could be shorter and blurted out "Deenie for short,"

"Deenie," he says, "like Teenie. Except Windy is the teenie one, you're more the voluptuous one. So, Deenie, let's see that cunt."

He lifted Windy off his lap, his penis looking three inches thick to me. He reaches over and pulls my panties to my knees and comments, "Oh, natural bush, don't see that much around her. What do you think Windy?"

I suspect that was rhetorical but Windy says, "No you don't." That's the first she's made a sound and she has this high pitched nasal voice with a southern sound.

He starts running his fingers through my pubic hair and pushing one into my slit and against my clitoris. All this time I had been getting more and more excited, so as soon as he touches my clitoris I jerk and gasp. "Oh, ready are you?" he says and starts massaging the clitoris and driving fingers inside me. I know I was squirming and writhing in orgasm as he did it and I was probably squealing loudly too. Anyway he's saying "go girl go!" and "let it out" and other stuff until I calm down.

Then he says, "You girls ready to fuck? Who's first?"

I remember him sitting there with Windy sitting on his penis and I say, "you've already fucked Windy."

He replies, "I gather from that you think it's your turn." while he says that he stands and pushes me back onto the couch. "That wasn't fucking," he says and turns to Windy, "What would you say it was?"

She says "relaxing."

Meanwhile he's jammed his fat cock up my vagina saying, "right, this is fucking!" and starts flailing away into me. He has me on my back and really fills me up. His testicles slapping my rear on each stroke.

He tells Windy to sit on my face and asks, "What does she taste like?" Well, I start lapping at her genitals. She has a salty with kind of fishy flavor and I tell him that. He says, "Finger fuck her, Deenie!"

It takes me a few seconds to remember that "Deenie" is me and I push a couple of finger inside her all the way to her cervix, hard cone with a slight dimple in the middle. I continue to lick at her clitoris.

You know what? She just sits there. It's like her sex parts are numb or that she just doesn't care. Then he has us change positions and I watch his thick cock driving into her. It looks so big that it shouldn't fit inside the skinny body but she takes it without complaint while she licks away at me, her fingers wiggling inside me. I explode with another orgasm while Captain smiles and laughs at my pleasure. It's hard to tell whether he's mocking or enjoying seeing me enjoy it.

He does us each doggy style while we lick and finger each other again. It's fascinating to watch his thick penis thrusting into Windy's vagina and then watch it pull out. Her labia and even some of her vaginal wall come out with it. I'm amazed that she takes the whole thing so stoically. When he does me he has this ability to drive his testicles hard against my clitoris. I have another orgasm because of the stimulation and he laughs and laughs while continuing to drive into me.