My Name is Jack Jacobson. I was recently convicted of marijuana possession. Luckily, it was my first offense. I was put on probation and into a "diversionary program". One of the conditions of probation was that I refrain from using alcohol and marijuana, to that end I was to report for periodic drug tests. My probation officer's name was Jean Simmons.
So the fateful day came and I reported to the probation office. All I knew was what I thought was a "he" was named Jean Simmons. It was no big deal. I didn't want to go to jail so I had complied with the terms of my probation and would almost certainly test negative. Much to my surprise, Jean Simmons was a woman! Not only that but she was drop dead gorgeous. She must have been older than she looked because she looked 20 years old. I'm 25 years old by the way.
She was dressed like a classy slut with a too short black skirt, a black blazer and a thin white shirt. She must have been 6 feet tall in her heels. Maybe she was deliberately trying to create a sexually charged atmosphere because she had on slutty makeup, too much eye shadow and bright lipstick. Her blonde hair had some kind of shiny jell in it and it hung loosely to her shoulders.
After the introductions, we discussed my probation and basically she was against everything that is fun. She said she was a "hands on" probation officer. (which I thought meant she was going to ride me like a donkey to the full extent allowed by law, Just my luck.)
Then, she came straight to the point. "I need a urine test" and she handed me a cup. "Right this way", she said and we went down the hall to the bathroom. "Step right into that bathroom and we'll be done in a jiffy."
So I went through the bathroom door and as I shut the door, she blocked it with her foot and followed me in and said, "The urine test must be supervised"
I thought, this was just not right, what kind of fucking outfit were they running here. "I'm not going to pee in front of women. No way, I want to see your supervisor"
So we exited the john and went back into for her office, she paged the secretary and asked for the supervisor. After a few minutes, her supervisor showed up and turns out she's also an attractive woman. To make a short story shorter, she backed Miss Simmons up, the basic argument being "What if your probation officer were a man? We don't discrimination based upon a person's sex in this office."
"Then can I change to a male probation officer?" , I said, hopefully.
"Tell it to the judge, for now you're assigned to Miss Simmons." and off she went.
So we headed back to the bathroom where I said, "I just can't do it in front of a woman."
"We've already settled that, either you take this test or you're going to jail, now which is it going to be?"
"The urine test I guess"
Clearly annoyed, she said "Then get on with it, you wasting my time, I have other clients, you know, I've seen plenty of penises in this job and I'm sure your's is nothing special"
Quickly, she sat on the toilet seat and pulled me around to face her. She opened the button of my jeans and pulled down the zipper. I was too stunned to do or say anything. She grabbed the waistband of my jeans and pulled both my underwear and my jeans to my knees in one fell swoop!
