A little longer than my usual offerings, but the dialogue breaks up the solid text. Hope you like it - it's been a while since I posted!
*****
The now-familiar inner debate gripped her again, and argued and counter-argued each case to herself until, with a sigh of resignation, and a cold thrill of shame and taboo, her mind was made up.
Yes, the receptionist informed her, the same room was available for one night only on Tuesday or Wednesday. Sarah toyed with the idea of booking the day off work, but decided against it. Partly she feared that with more time on her hands she would lose her nerve. Part of it, she knew deep down, was the secrecy and subterfuge, the acting normal at work when at the end of her day she would be indulging -- again -- in her secret fantasy.
The ultimate thrill -- and stab of shame -- was being wished a nice evening as she left the office.
Repeatedly over the past three weeks she had thought back to what she had done. In the cold light of day she could hardly believe it. But, as the saying goes, the camera never lies. This one certainly hadn't.
She found herself drawn back again to the videotape, and to pausing it as The Watcher appeared. Each viewing enabled her to anticipate the precise moment, announced by the sound of her own voice: "Is... can you see anyone watching from the apartments?" The excited tone in her words thrilled her each time she watched, and her wantonness shocked and delighted her.
Each time she pleasured herself, bringing herself off as The Watcher, only half-discernible, appeared on the screen, his arm jerking to the sight that she wilfully and shamelessly presented to him.
Her curiosity grew along with her excitement and guilt.
Tom had only been able to catch a few moments. Part of her wished the footage were longer. She longed to see the man better who matched her lewdness. She had so little to go off.
Average height. Slightly overweight and balding. Glasses. His face wasn't clear due to the poor lighting. Not like the footage of herself. No -- she gently remonstrated with herself -- no, the lighting in the hotel room had been more than adequate to illuminate her masturbation to The Watcher.
With a pang of guilt and arousal, she wondered if others had also seen her, unbeknown to her and to Tom as he recorded the sordid act. Her mind raced giddily as she invented personalities, and appearances, and whether they were single or spying secretly at her without the knowledge of a parent, a girlfriend, a wife...
And although the words hadn't been captured on the tape, she remembered her question to Tom as he had filmed, and his reply:
"Tell me, Tom. Was he... was he... WANKING?"
"Yes, Sarah. He was wanking. I'm sure of it."
__________
She checked in, trying to suppress the excitement in her voice, then made her way in the lift and to her room. Neither the receptionist nor the other two guests whom, she encountered paid her much attention. Yet again her cheeks flushed as she contrasted her apparently innocent, respectable appearance with the sordid nature of her stay.
Her pulse quickened as she entered the room of her previous visit, and as she swept her eyes around it. She gave a low, involuntary gasp at the curtained window. She locked the door and, conscious that her breathing was a little more laboured, she stepped to the window and pulled the curtains open.
Despite her intention simply to look across at the whole block of apartments, her eye was instantly drawn to The Watcher's window. It was in darkness, and the curtains were closed, with no sign of life. For a few moments she willed him to appear, but it was no use, of course.
Each stage of her preparations seemed an irretrievable step further down the road she had already taken. On the windowsill she placed the new mobile phone that she had bought, the cheapest pay-as-you-go one that she could find, and to which she had fitted a SIM card from a corner newsagent shop as an added safeguard to her anonymity.
She moved one of the bedside lamps so that it would illuminate her well enough when she again took up her shameless stand, placing it so that it would keep her face in shadow. Partly it was to preserve her anonymity, but she knew that it would also enhance the element of tease. She switched off the main light, leaving only the smaller lamp on.
Last of all she took from her bag the large, folded sheet of paper. A twinge of arousal and shame ran through her as she looked at it. Although she had done so a dozen or more times already, she re-checked that she had written on it correctly -- the number of her new mobile phone! She glanced at the large figures from the thick-tipped marker pen, re-folded it and placed it on the windowsill. She switched on the mobile phone and placed it next to the paper.
"Where is this all going to end?" a silent voice in her head asked. "Isn't it enough to have done what you've done already, you slut -- bringing yourself off in front of a near-stranger with a video camera -- and with the curtains open, for anyone to watch?"
"No! No it bloody well isn't enough!" she said softly but aloud, as if to drown the silent accusing voice. This was to be a further step of rebellion against the parental pressures of her youth, the responsibilities and stresses of her job, and the betrayal of her former partner.
The silent inner voice pleaded with her again as she looked across to The Watcher's window. There was still time to change her mind. The room was paid for. All she had to do was to hand in her keys and say that she had had to change her plans.
"No way! No BLOO-DY way!" she hissed in response.
She moved from the window, slid off her jacket, and dropped it onto the bed. As nonchalantly as she could, she unbuttoned her blouse and allowed it to slip open. She glanced down at her B-cup breasts in her white bra. Her nipples were pressing against the satin. She wondered whether anyone else was looking at them from the apartments.
She kicked off her shoes and, although she felt anything but casual, she walked as nonchalantly as she could to the en-suite to take a pee -- and to change her underwear. Upon her return she made herself walk slowly and seemingly without purpose to the window. She stood a little to one side rather than in the centre of the window -- to give her secret admirer the best angle of view. She stood there for a few moments, her white blouse open to display her breasts in her white bra, hopefully the white fabric standing out well in the subdued light. Still there was no sign of life from The Watcher's window.
She slid her blouse off her shoulders and arms, and draped it over the chair. She pulled up the other chair and sat down in open view, pretending to read the magazine that she had brought. As she read, she traced her fingers lightly up and down her throat, inching gradually down to her cleft, and over the tops of her breasts above her bra.
Her mind drifted back a few weeks, and the memory of being watched by her mystery admirer aroused her as she lightly caressed herself. She glanced at her watch. It was still relatively early. Surely there was time yet. She told herself to be patient.
She stood up to make herself a cup of coffee from the courtesy tray. She walked to the window as she waited for the kettle to boil. Her heart skipped a beat as she saw that there was a light on in The Watcher's window. She ignored the kettle and gazed across at the window. She resisted the urge to check her watch as the moments ticked by, her will and mind bent on summoning him to the window, silently pleading with him and urging him, promising a view of her breasts and of her self-pleasuring if he would only draw back his curtains.
She took a few steps back from the window, but still open to view. She unzipped her skirt and watched it glide down her legs. She stepped out of it, but left it where it lay around her feet.
She drew her bra down and eased her left breast free, then stroked her breasts lightly in turn, caressing the one naked orb and the other through her white, satin bra. She looked down at her white satin waist slip, glimmering sensually in the soft light from the lamp. She hiked it up, revealing the black tops of her sheer stockings, ivory with a provocative black seam up the back.
.
She traced her fingertip lightly along the lacy stockingtop, enjoying the texture of the warm lace. Her fingers stroked her thigh below the stockingtop, stroking and pressing against it, proud of the toned firmness of her flesh. She closed her eyes for a moment and caressed her sensitive inner thigh, then looked up.
A thrill of delight and shame gripped her. His light was off but the curtains were now slightly open. It was all she could do not to run to the window and wave. She was certain that her stance away from the window allowed him to see her stockinged thighs.
Pretending that she hadn't noticed, she continued to caress herself. She let her slip drop back into place, but caressed her flattish belly with one hand, and her breasts with the other. Her hand briefly moved over her crotch, and she gave it a little squeeze, then swept slowly over her flanks and thighs.
She stepped to the window and partly closed the curtains. Although she was not averse to being seen by others, she wanted to concentrate on The Watcher. She looked across and twitched the edge of one curtain several times, as a signal that she was aware of him. A surge of excitement ran through her as he twitched his curtain in response.
She realised that her hands were trembling as she picked up her mobile phone, and propped up the piece of paper that bore her number. Then she stepped a few paces from the window once more.
She held the phone near to her face as an encouragement, and caressed her breasts with her other hand. She turned to one side to offer a view of her breasts in profile, and of her backside, as she touched and stroked herself.
She turned her back to the window and gyrated her hips and bum provocatively, reaching back and fondling her bum cheeks. She parted her legs slightly, causing the split in her slip to open and reveal her creamy, stockinged thighs.
There was still no response on her phone. She turned back to the window.
"Come on, Watcher! Don't be shy of Sarah! I know you like what you see -- just bloody ring and tell me you're hot and hard at the sight!" she murmured. She peeled her bra down and scooped her
A few more minutes passed. Then her phone rang. It startled her, and it took her a few flustered moments to answer.
