My Life with a Big One

Having a big dick isn't all wine and roses. When it first dawned on me that my dick was bigger than average it was the greatest thrill. I would go online and find size charts and averages and figure out where I landed on the graph. Of course, all the charts were for adults and I was still growing and yet still I was at the far right end of the graphs. I would measure my length and girth daily and even write math equations to figure out my approximate volume assuming my dick were a perfect cylinder. I can remember being in class writing equations for the volume of my dick, getting myself turned on and that can be dangerous in my situation. My problem wasn't my length but girth. Trying to remain inconspicuous was increasingly a problem but eventually my secret was too well known to bother.

I became obsessed with my own dick size to the point where it occupied most of my waking hours and even occasionally my dreams. I had dreams of having a penis that was several feet long and at that point I really didn't know where I would max out. In the ridiculousness of my youth I would fantasize that my cock was an inhuman size as if that would be a good thing. Most guys wish for a big dick but my wish was actually coming true even if it were consuming my life.

I would never in a million years want an average sized dick but I often wonder what it would be like to have something more modest like 8 or 9 inches. That's still extraordinarily large but I'd like to think my obsession would be less than it is. I can remember, in my first year of college, going to a farm and mentally comparing my size to a horse. I was literally wondering which of us had the larger dick and to this day I believe I may have been larger. But, this is not something someone should be thinking about on a tour of a farm.

I could literally just sit in my room and turn myself on looking at my own dick. I can get a full erection without touching my dick. I've had times where I've cum just at the thought of my own dick. I've had times where I've gotten an erection and cum in public in my pants. If my mind starts drifting to thoughts of my penis size things can easily start to snowball. I try to switch my thoughts but there have been times where I lost control. Trying to somehow hide something that's over an inch longer than two soda cans stacked end to end and as thick as a can is pretty much impossible. I am a self confessed exhibitionist but there is a time and a place for everything. If I'm riding on a subway and my dick is bulging from my pants it's a very awkward feeling and I've gotten a lot of hateful looks.

If you think people are going to get all turned on when they see my massive bulge, think again. My dick is so crazy big that people automatically assume I'm stuffing. Heck, that even happens when I'm completely flaccid. Of those people who actually believe the bulge is real they just assume I'm some kind of freak with a public erection. Fact is every guy gets the occasional erection in public but you don't notice it. I've had times where I started to get an erection and then I've reached in my pants to try and move my dick into a position so that it can grow without being exposed. A few times my erection grew up towards my navel and believe me, it grows well past the top of my pants. I had this happen while riding on a subway. I was sitting slumped over so that my dick rode up my shirt all the way to my chest. I tried folding my arms to hide the bulge but then I was pressing against my dick which only exasperated the problem. My stop was approaching and as long as I was touching my dick it was never going to go down so I tried holding my head so my forearms might shield the view but all this focus on my erection only served to make things worse.

My stop finally arrived and I was in full hard-on mode so I just tried to get out as fast as possible. Picture this. I stand up but my hard-on isn't rock solid like average sized guys. It's always a bit floppy so the weight causes it to flop forward pushing my shirt out. Meanwhile, you can see the thick bulge in my pants where it's extending up under my shirt. I've committed myself to getting off the train but as I walk my dick is bobbling around in my shirt like crazy so I do the only think I could think of at the moment and grab it. Now I'm shuffling off the train with tons of people around and I'm clearly holding a massive erection or possibly smuggling a huge sausage under my shirt.

People noticed. EVERYONE noticed and you're talking about a cross section of society including genders, races and ages all noticing that something severely weird is going on under my shirt. Make no mistake, I am the absolute furthest thing from a tough guy. I'm skinny with glasses and not particularly tall. I'm rushing around a crowded subway station, holding my massive dick, trying to find a bathroom to duck in to as I'm getting looks left and right. After some moments of panic I found bathroom but there were several men in line for stall so I got in line with my arms crossed in a way that hid as much of my bulge as possible and bent over slightly. Once I got in the stall I pulled my dick out a rubbed it for all my worth, praying that no one could see through the crack or hear what I was doing. I had to stand to aim into the toilet and relieve myself but I absolutely exploded.

This was not even my worst moment of public embarrassment brought on by my dick size. At least I was surrounded by strangers. This is not always the case. I had an incident where I fell asleep on the couch at my friends house and my friends mother saw my dick hanging out the bottom of my shorts. In another case, I went to a restaurant with my friends family. I excused myself to go to the bathroom and when I was standing at a rather open urinal my buddies dad walked in. My dick is big enough to catch peoples attention in there peripheral vision and my friends dad just blurted out, "damn, Lester, that's a big dick." I replied with an incredibly awkward thank you. When we got back to the table he asked his son if he'd ever seen how big my dick was and he said this right in front of my buddies mom.

I love when people find out I have a huge dick and I love with the conversation turns to my dick size. I can't count how many times I've pulled it out for curious folks. On the other hand there are times when I would prefer to be more discrete. Unfortunately, my dick is always huge regardless of where I'm at. Public speaking is always stressful but imagine the added stress of worrying about your bulge. Swimming pools are a problem, gym class was a huge problem, amusement parks can be a problem because a huge cock and vigorous motion can be a bad combination. I would never want to trade my dick but it would be awesome if I could put it away in a drawer when I'm going to certain events. I figure I already got my one major wish for this lifetime so a removable dick ain't gonna happen.