My Evolving Sexuality

My name is Jill. Presently I am forty-five years old. I am kind of tall at 5'9"and I weigh 140 lbs. I am not a small woman but not excessively large either. The weight on my body is well proportion and it is muscle not fat. My breasts are C cup with the sag one would expect for a woman my age (but they really look great inside a bra that pushes everything up!). My stomach is essentially flat with a hint of a six pack. My hips are just about an inch wider than my shoulders. They lead into some solid well shaped thighs and calves. I also possess a prominent tightly muscular ass. My arms are well defined and somewhat muscular. I am a red head and therefore have the typical pale skin with a smattering of freckles. My red hair comes down to just below my shoulders.

I married at the age of twenty-five. The marriage lasted only two turbulent years. There were problems with us being able to just get along. Each one of us wanted to be in control of the marriage. The same type of problems existed in our sex life as well. The sex was frustrating and therefore not enjoyable. That turned me off sexually. Fortunately, the marriage did not produce any children as I was having difficulty conceiving. My doctor told for me that to get pregnant; it would take a very concerted effort on my part without which I most likely will never conceive. I never remarried and seldom dated.

Went I was in my late thirties, I noticed my fit body was beginning to show signs of softening and losing muscle tone. I was always proud of natural level of fitness that my body had. So, I decided to, for the first time in my life, to start a regiment of physical training. That resulted in my getting a gym membership. At the gym, I was assigned a physical trainer, Bill. He developed a series of free weight lifts and running on the stationary bikes that not only stopped the deterioration of my body but firmed and added more muscle to it.

After a year under Bill's guidance, Bill came up with the idea of celebrating my accomplishment by giving me something that would depict the end results of all our work together. It would also serve as an inspiration to for me to continue working out. He talked me into letting him take nude picture of my body that would capture my true physical fitness. He also suggested, that to show the development of my lower stomach, that I completely shave my mid body, vagina and anal regions.

I felt so proud of myself, that I agreed to his suggestion under the condition that the picture would be taken with my camera only. I would then decide whether to have a print made of the picture.

We took the picture of me standing slightly sideways to the camera which gave a great view of my tight hips and the firmness of the muscles in my legs. The pose showed off the muscles in my arms by having both of my arms raised with my hands toward the back of my head.

Two things occurred because of that picture being taken: one, a print of that picture now hangs over the head board of my bed; and two I have never allowed hair to regrow in my mid body. That actually fitted my body since otherwise, I have very little body hair.

The major joy in my life has come from helping to raise my nephew Robert, the son of my only sibling Julie. Julie was a single mother (she conceived during stint of one-night stands and was not sure who the father was). Raising a boy without a father turned into a very difficult task for Julie and I. Robert was constantly getting into trouble. When he did, he would always come running to me asking me for help and promising to correct his behavior. Since I could not have a child, I poured all my love into him and as a result spoiled him.

Career wise, my life was fairly successful. Being a single lady who was seldom involved with a male, I had plenty of time and energy to devote to my career. I was, at forty-five, midway up the corporate ladder. I have a home in a very nice neighborhood.

Robert spent the last two years of high school and his first year of college living with me. Later he then moved out on his own and got into trouble with the law on two occasions. Living in California, he had to be careful of the three strikes rule. So, I brought him back to live with me. It has been rough trying to keep him out of trouble. Ten months ago, nearing the end of winter, the shit hit the fan.

It was a very late Friday night at work. I left the office at around 10:00pm. At that time of night, it takes about 40 minutes to drive home. I had just driven into my driveway when I saw my neighbor Tom (who was in his night clothes) dragging Robert into his house. I immediately ran over to his house and walked into the open front door. There in the living room I saw Tom strike Robert knocking him to the floor. Tom then said to Robert, "You have done it now, I am calling the police." I yell at Tom, "What is going on here and why are you going to call the police?" Tom looked at me and slowly put the phone down.

"I am sorry Jill. I came downstairs to investigate a noise I heard in the living room. I saw Robert removing my TV from my wall. I called out to him and he ran out of the house on to the lawn. I ran after him, caught him and after a brief fight, brought him back into my house so I could call the police. Robert attempted to run out again, so I had to hit to make him stay here." Tom, even though he is 50 years old, is a solidly built athletic male who can clearly take care of himself.

Realizing that if Tom did call the police, Robert could potentially end up in prison for the rest of his life. I said to Tom, "Tom please stop and let talk this over. You do not need to call the police."

Tom replied, "Sorry Jill. You and I have talked about the problems Robert has created for himself and for you. He doesn't listen to you and now he has broken into my house. I am your neighbor. That proves that he is now a harden criminal. For the sake of this neighborhood he has to be made to pay for this crime by being arrested and put into jail."

I became hysterical and went up to Tom grabbed him by the arm and said, "Tom I am begging you do not call the police. You know that Robert is my heart. Do not do this to him and to me. I will pay for all of the damaged he has done to your home."

"Jill the damage to my home is not really the issue here. Robert cannot be trusted. In a short time, he probably break into another neighbor's home and that time someone might be seriously hurt. If that happen, the blame would be on me. Sorry but I do not want something like that on my conscious. "

Frantically thinking, I came up with an idea. "Tom if you do not call the police, I will arrange to send Robert to his cousin ranch in Utah. A year ago, I had talked to him about Robert and he made an offer to help by having Robert live with him. I will take him up on his offer and tomorrow I will take Robert there."

Tom stopped and thought about for a minute and then shook his head no. "Sorry Jill, I do not see that as a solution."

Crying my eyes out, I pleaded with Tom to reconsider. Before he could answer, I looked Tom square into his eyes and said, "Tom do this for me and I in turn promise to do any and every thing that you ask of me!" I could see the look of pity in Tom's eyes.

He thought for a minute and then said, "Jill, I delay calling the police until tomorrow evening at 9:00pm. If by that time you have taken him to Utah; obtain pictorial evidence of his being in Utah at this cousin house; return here to my house with that evidence; then and only then will I agree not to call the police. After that, you and I must come to an agreement as to what you will do for me in return for me promising to never to call the police about his breaking into my home."

After a hectic day of travel by car, plane, car, plane and finally car I was pulling up into my own driveway. It was now 9:30pm. Upon my arrival back at my home airport, I realized that I could not get back by Tom's 9:00pm deadline. I call him from the airport parking lot just before pulling out for the drive home. That was an unexpected tense conversation. Tom was upset that I would be a half hour late. I explained that the return flight home had been delayed by two hours and it was not possible for me to switch to another flight as my flight was the last one departing Utah to fly to my home airport. He didn't want to hear an excuse. He threatens to immediately call the police. I ended up crying and begging him to give me the extra time. He finally relented and gave me an extra hour time. I was not looking forward to our conversation about my promise to do any and everything he would request of me.

On that drive from the airport to home, I went over in my mind the things that I knew about Tom. He is 50 years old and stands at least 6' 3" with a solid 230-pound muscular body. He just retired from a lucrative engineering position. He lives alone and is not married. I had noticed an occasional female presence at his home but never a steady woman around his house. He does have a circle of male friends who come over occasionally for televised sports events and poker games (normal guy stuff). Think through these thoughts about Tom, it surprised me that I knew that much about him.

I needed to be aware of any thing about him that might help me in limiting what I would have to commit to in order to keep my promise. I am a woman of my word but that does not mean that I would stupidly just give in to just anything. After all, Tom did say that we would discuss what he would accept from me in compensation for the trouble Robert had caused him.

I walked from my yard over to Tom's house. I was worried and tired physically, mentally and emotionally. Tom opened his door and directed me into his living room. I immediately notice that the room had been cleaned up and there was no trace of Robert's break in and the subsequent fight with Tom. As I sat down on his couch, I handed him the photos of Robert standing next to his cousin with a view of the ranch in the background. That satisfied Tom that first condition of our agreement had been met.

Tom pulled up chair and sat directly in front of me and stated, "Ok Jill what exactly does your promise to do any and everything I ask of you mean?"

"It means that once we come to an agreement on the scope of what you can ask me to do, I will do what you ask of me, no questions asked."

"And who decides what that scope will be, you or me?"

"Well, we will discuss certain ideas. Since in the end, I must do these things, the final decision is mine."

Tom sat up straight, and very calmly said, "Jill I have security camera film of Robert breaking into my house, of him running out of the house and of the fight that pursued once I caught him still on my property. I took pictures of the damaged to my living room which was a result of his theft and the scuffled between Robert and myself. I have the receipts for the work that was done today to repair my home, the cost of which was double since I wanted the repairs completed before 9:00pm tonight. No Jill, I decide what you will be doing for me to compensate me for all of trouble Robert caused and for letting you talk me into compromising my principles by letting him go! If you do not right now agree to abide by what I want from you without me telling you what that will be, I will get up from this chair and call the police. What is your answer?"

I was taken aback. No one had ever spoken to me in that manner. I had always been the one to decide things. Realizing that unless I agreed to Tom's demand, Robert would be in jail before the end of this week, I replied, in a still somewhat defiant manner, "Yes I accept your terms."

Tom replied, "No that is not acceptable. You must state, "I agree to do any and everything that you, Tom, ask me to do no matter what it is that is being asked of me. I do this without any reservations or intent to deceive. I agree to follow your commands for period of one year starting tonight."

I then coldly stated, "I Jill Wilson agree to do any and everything that you, Tom, ask me to do no matter what it is that is being asked of me. I do this without any reservations or intent to deceive." I agree to follow your commands for period of one year starting tonight."

Tom then said, "Thank you Jill for promising to do what you said you would do when you first begged me to not call the police. A person is only as good as their word. I know in my heart that will keep your word."

"Thank you, Tom, for respecting my given word."

"I want two things from you this night. First you are never ever again to address me in that cold and defiant manner that you have been using through this conversation. Is that understood?"

Having no choice in the matter, I replied, "Yes Tom I understand."

"Now for the second thing, I want you to get up and come over here and stand directly in front of me. You are to remove your shoes, pants, stocking, and your panties and then give them to me." Once you have completed that task, since this has been a long day for the both of us, you may leave to go back to your house. I want you to return to my house tomorrow night at 10:30PM dressed exactly as you were when you leave here this evening. I will then go over in detail the things that I will require of you during this year of your servitude to me."

I do not know if it was the fact that I had no choice in the matter or from the effects of the shock of hearing the demand in his voice as Tom told me what to do, but I had an almost out of body experience as I saw myself walk over to Tom, remove my shoes and pants (I was not wearing any stockings) and hand them to him. With my head hanging down low in shame, I hooked my fingers into my panties and slowly pull them off realizing that they were emitting a strong body odor due this long and tiring day. I handed the panties to Tom and quickly turned and walked to the front door. Opening the door slowly so I could look to see if anyone was outside or driving by. Fortunately, there was no one in sight. Summing my last ounce of dignity that I had remaining, I straighten out my posture and walked straight to my house.

The next evening as I was leaving the bathroom after finishing my shower, I looked at my bedroom clock which showed that the time was 10:15PM. Picking up the bra, shirt and light jacket that I had on when I left Tom house last night, I put them on my naked body. I went down stairs to the window near the front door. I looked outside to see if it was clear for me to walk next door to Tom's house. The people who lived directly across the street from my house were on their porch waving goodbye to their daughter as she drove away. Checking the clock on the living room wall, it was 10:22PM. I could afford to wait two minutes to make sure they were well into their home before I walked across my yard on my way to Tom's house.

I walked over to Tom's front door. It was a good thing that the porch light was not on. I knocked and there was no response. I knocked again and the porch light came on but the door did not open. Shock and being to panic, I pleaded with Tom to open the door. Two minutes must have passed before I heard Tom telling me to come in through the unlocked door and to walk into the living room. As I entered and closed the door behind me, I heard Tom telling me to come and sit on the couch. Just as last night, I sat on the couch and Tom sat in the same chair facing me. After sitting down, I started to give Tom a piece of my mind for having me stands out there in that porch light.

He quite firmly said, "Shut up Jill. I told you to get here at 10:30PM not 10:28PM. Now sit here and listen closely to what I am going to tell you. I will never repeat this, so you better get it."

Stunned, but realizing I had no choice in this matter; I listen to what he was saying.

"I thought long and hard last night about how you can compensate me for what Robert did to my home and ultimately what you did in begging me to comprise my principles. Compensate me with money? No, I do not need money. But I have figured out what is missing in my life now. For one year, you will supply that one thing that missing thing in my life."

"When I was thirty, I meet a woman, whose name is not important. What is important is the relationship that developed between us. That relationship lasted one year. It ended with her tragic death due to a car accident. As she was backing out of her driveway, she was struck by a drunken young male driver (close to Robert's age) driving down her residential street at 60 miles an hour. Her death is why I have never married or have had a serious relationship."

"For that one year she devoted her life to being totally submissive and subservient in every way to me. I never asked that of her. She did because she was in love with me and she felt that doing so was the ultimate demonstration of that love for me. I never told her what to do; she just did them for me on her own. There were certain special occasions where she told me what she wanted me to do to her or asked me what I would have her do. No one can ever replace her. However, for this year, you will do for me the things she did. I will tell you what I want and when I want it. You will do those things without objection, resentment or reservation. If I detect resistance of any kind from you, all of the evidence I have of Robert's crime will be given to the police."

"The way you came to my house tonight was a reenactment of how she first visited my home. It was her way of exhibiting to me her subservience. On occasions through this year I will convey to you what I want from you, when you are to do it, and where you will do them. I will give you your instructions either by a phone call, an email, a text message, or by written instructions. Do you understand?"

What choice did I have, "Yes I understand".

"Good. Now come over here and stand in front of me with your back toward me."

Not liking it one bit, but with a compliant look on my face, I stood with my back to Tom. Then I felt it, his hand softly passing over my entire butt. He then told me to bend over at my waist and to spread my legs. His hand then moved to the lips of my vagina which he stroked. Lastly, he found my clitoris which he massaged. I admit that all felt good but I didn't like him taking advantage of me, so I fought off those feelings. I stayed in that positions, letting him do what he wanted. I kept my word; I complied with what he wanted me to do. He never said I had to like what he was doing, just to do what he requested.

After a few minutes, he withdrew his hand and said, "Goodnight Jill."

I straighten up and immediately walked out of his house not even taking the time to see if anyone was outside who could possibly see me. After closing the door to my house, I paused just inside the house realizing that it spite of my best effort to fended off any physical respond to his fondling of my butt and pussy, my body had automatically responded. My pussy lips were moist and I could see a liquid sheen on them. That pissed me off to no end! I had a restless sleep that night. I kept going over his demands of me. How was I going to be able to comply with his demands without losing it and refusing and/or rejecting these obvious sexual things that he wants me to do? Sex was never enjoyable to me and from what happen tonight I could only feel that was going to get worse.

I woke up to the alarm clock going off. I was still tried but I had to get up and go to work. I did make it through the day. Exhausted I went straight home. I had not heard anything from Tom. As I pulled into my driveway, I was filled with dread, thinking that I would see a note on my front door from Tom with instructions for me to do some dreaded thing. Walking to the door I did not see anything from Tom. What a relief. I had a peaceful rest of the night accompanied by a good night sleep. For the next two days (Tuesday and Wednesday), I received no form of communication from Tom. I began to think that maybe he had second thoughts about what he had demanded of me. Things changed on Thursday as I found a note tape to my front door. It simply said, "Come over to my house at 7:30PM. Please wear whatever clothes that you feel you will be comfortable in.", that seem to be a simple request. I had worn some pants and a bloused to work, so I decided to keep them on.