"PAYASO!!" Her voice came in the darkness with an extended echo.
"PAYASO!!!" It was closer echoing even more as she drew near moving faster than I would've expected. She'd pushed, poked, and prodded until her bullying forced me to react like a cornered animal expectantly hitting her where she lived. Her voice trailed off in the darkness almost a distress call.
I backed up a few steps with my battered suitcase stuffed haphazardly with my camera bag and accessories. My laptop was probably trashed but I'd been able to fire a shot in the darkness hitting her dead square in the heart with a silver bullet.
"PAYASO!!!!" Shawnee appeared almost two blocks over dead ahead running faster than any woman her size should've had a right to and I should've been worried, but my feet were stuck in place. I'd just froze in place.
I'd just walked not having any immediate destination until my emotions got the better of me, There was nothing ahead or behind me other than a low chain link fence and these sort of concrete blocks already tagged with graffiti.
Shawnee stopped short about a good fifteen feet away doubled over finally succumbing to her own considerable weight. I stood there plastered to the spot watching as she'd come with nothing but her phone in hand huffing and wheezing a while before catching her second wind. For the first time since meeting again, I didn't have all this static in my head about doing the "right" thing, but I knew we'd come to an emotional impasse. Shawnee craned her head up looking at me from a distance righting herself with the hand holding her phone pressed to her chest.
We stood there looking at one another until I reacted shrugging. I let go of my battered suitcase leaving my camera bag hanging on the crooked pullout handle. She was standing there visibly breathing as I spread my arms.
"Say it to my face; I want to hear you say it right now." Shawnee huffed.
I didn't say anything.
I was pretty sure Shawnee had never come this far from her place not realizing she was wearing nothing but a thin cotton tee and gym shorts that were way too small for the public. Her thighs were bulging so much the rest of the material was bunched up in her crotch.
"Suitcase pimp."
I didn't say anything.
"Say it, be a fucking man for once and say it to me while I'm right here in front of you." She was glaring at me as the streetlights off in the distance vaguely highlighted some glistening patches on her round baby face. Shawnee started towards me with measured steps slowly closing the distance. I was expecting a blowup and dreading it.
"Call me a whore again like you did back in the day when you sent me that dollar." The memory popped up in my head the moment it was mentioned.
"Shawnee."
"ALL ASS-keep them cheeks up; that's what you said back then...right payaso? See, that's why I won't stop calling you a fucking clown nigga. You got me all fucked up and Andre's simple ass too; and then sent me a dollar. That was for laughs, right?"
"You helped her; traded your nigga Andre for what, huh? Some motherfucking clout and a goddam Instagram page. Hey you weren't the only victim Shawnee; YOU brought your NIGGA to her; I didn't have shit to do with that mess and you know it bitch. I AIN'T NOBODY'S WHIPPING BOY!! WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!!"
"I got low, real motherfucking low after you sent me that dollar. Kind of panicked and shot you back fifteen hundred I guess, trying to patch up my ego after you insinuated I was cheap. Forty-eight hours later I was on a bender working some "shifts" nonstop if you get my drift. I didn't even know why I was doing it until shit went down. Got one BIG ASS MOTHERFUCKING JOB that night. Oh, you should've been there with your camera."
"Nobody cares Shawnee." It was a low blow she deserved to the fullest in my opinion.
"I know." She was standing right in front of me hands on her hips with her chin tilted up looking at the stars above in the sparkling night sky. Now she was close enough I could see that she was melting down sobbing as she flashed me a smile.
"Want another dollar?" I couldn't help going in for the kill as she stood in front of me in profile.
"¡TE VOY A JODER POR VERDADERO NIGGA!"Before I could react I was hit with the force of a raging bull as Shawnee football speared me with everything she had. All of the air was knocked out of my lungs at the unsuspected lunge which took me off of my feet. Both of us tumbled backwards over the edge onto the sand rolling down the embankment towards the ocean. The momentum kept us entangled and tumbling along until she ended up on top swinging for the fences.
Everything left inside that was bottled up just, erupted...
This was the moment she'd been waiting for since we crossed paths again after that morning I'd jumped out of her car so long ago. This was her moment, Shawnee Thompson's time to get what she wanted in no uncertain terms as the fists came flying from every conceivable angle she could muster. Every one of those launched ham fists of hers were haymakers designed to knock me unconscious, but they came each, with a price.
Barely any of them were striking the intended target, my face. This wasn't my first rodeo and I'd become exceedingly good at weathering street level beatdowns getting my arms in front of me, hands framing my face. Of course I caught a few glancing blows. I was lucky Shawnee hadn't come armed with a box cutter or knife; just raw unbridled emotion akin to the hurricanes that periodically hit this state. I was surprised when Shawnee employed a move I hadn't seen in a fight since I was in grade school.
She headbutted me.
Two times in quick succession.
It felt like being hit in the face with a bowling ball stunning me. In those few precious seconds I was seeing all the stars in the universe and beyond, Shawnee palmed the top of my head like a basketball laying in several sucker punches that hit harder than I ever would've thought.
"COME ON MOTHERFUCKER FIGHT ME YOU SON OF A BITCH!! I'VE BEEN FIGHTING BOYS FOR MY ASS SINCE I WAS TWELVE YOU BASTARD!! I'VE BEEN FIGHTING OTHER GIRLS FOR ANDRE AND SLICING UP BITCHES SINCE I WAS FIFTEEN!! I HAD TO MAKE HIM GET OUT OF SCHOOL WITH ME BECAUSE I WAS ABOUT TO RUN IN ON THIS BITCH AND GO GHOSTFACE ON HER BLACK SNOOTY BUM ASS!! FIGHT ME!! I HATED BEING YOUR COW NIGGA!! YOU TREATED EVERYONE ELSE BETTER THAN ME!! ALL OF YOU!!! YOU JUST FUCKED BUT YOU DIDN'T LOVE ME EITHER!! YOU GOT LOVE FOR RASHIDA BUT NOT FOR ME!! YOU NEVER!! YOU!! You never ever made love to...."
Shawnee went silent still mounting me with both hands dangerously wrapped around my neck.
I clipped her chin.
She went after my offending hand using both of hers to pin it down onto the sand. My freed left arm shot up hand grabbing the back of her neck instead of going at her ribs. Shawnee shoved an elbow trying to dislodge it then had the audacity to attempt to pin both of my raised arms adjacent to my head by the wrists. Both of us were grunting and wheezing from the intense exertion, but I went into a continuous squirming rocking motion underneath her zaftig proportions not allowing her to really use her weight. I kept this up until she made a move with her knee.
I rolled her over closer to the incoming tide pinning her wrists down with my knees drawn up under her enormous butt. This position pushed her thighs up towards her chest, legs spread apart bent at the knees on both sides. I was feeling it in my face knowing she'd done a number on me while Shawnee had a visible bruise on her chin. She struggled with me mightily and I'm embarrassed to say that it took damn near everything I had to keep her pinned down on her back. Shawnee began gasping and coughing a bit from the tussle as tears started running freely in torrents.