I used to think I was broken. Now I know I'm bent, very, very, bent.
It was somewhere in my early teen years I realized how easily a gal could turn a man's head and something about that attraction always set the butterflies in my tummy a flying. It never occurred to me how challenging that could be until I found my first girl friend. She was stunning and completely out of my class. While I was just beginning to understand the dynamics of men and women she was well aware of the power she held and dressed to maximize its intrigue.
We first started dating during our senior year in high school and no matter where we went guys always seemed to swing their gaze her way. Heck often one or two were bold enough to approach her even though I was right there. The guys would chat and flirt with her and she'd flirt right back at them. It was a confusing time for me and in my youth I thought it was my job to chase these interlopers away and more than once fights ensued. It wasn't a bit like in the movies where the damsel rewards the hero with kisses and more. Instead all that happened was that each of these moments ended in arguments with my gal. Our main differences seemed to focus around her not needing me to fight her battles. Sadly, like I said there was more than one fight and I was a very slow learner.
After the fights and the inevitable arguments I'd head back home nursing bruises, a few cuts and a damaged ego. In the silence of the solitary drive home while mulling over the whole situation I began to recognize one other thing. I was turned on by the obvious sexual attraction men had for my date but her flirting back sent me into the stratosphere.
Time passed and as life moves on my gal I and broke apart. One of her overriding reasons for our breakup was my jealous reaction to other guys. Funny, but by the time we were breaking up I was already transitioning into a state where not only did her flirting and the associated attraction not bother me but instead left me sexually aroused, very highly aroused.
We went our separate ways. Her to a college in our own home town and I to a college half the country away. On my own and a jillion miles from anyone I knew I had many nights to think back upon my first girl and the times we had both good and bad. It was alone in the dark that I firmly seated my wild desire to watch my lover with other men. A hopeless time for me because I never thought I'd ever be able to voice this desire to a partner without her casting me aside for the pervert I felt myself to be.
Life, however, is its own merry trickster and while I spent my time cracking books instead of dating I met Andrea one Saturday afternoon in the library. She wandered in with her long, silky, hair tied back into a pony tail. It swayed back and forth with each step she took. She was so very captivating in her jeans and a tight fitting low cut cotton top. She was exactly the type of gal that always caught my attention. Slim, athletic and boobs the size of martini glasses and best of all she was braless. Her nipples puffed and lent a defined dark round pinkness showing through her top. She was seductively casual in her carriage in that mysterious way some women seem to be able to carry off without a second thought. I scanned the library and noticed many eyes on her, both men and women. She threw a relaxed, seductive smile my way as she pulled a chair out on the other side of the table.
Over the next hours we began to get acquainted. Mixing in smiles, smoldering looks with shuffled books and papers as we studied or tried to study. The longer we sat together the harder it became for me to concentrate on my books. On one of the many time I looked up at her I found her idly tapping a pen against her lower lip while loose strands of her hair fell across her forehead. With a distracted brush of her hand she chased those bits of strawberry colored flotsam back to their proper resting place. I couldn't stop watching her. How can something as simple as her brushing that hair from her face be so captivating?
Catching me watching she asked with an all too knowing smile;
"What are you looking at?"
Her smile was so contagious I smiled back and answered;
"I'm doing the same thing that guy over there is doing... Wondering what you'd look like naked."
At touch too forward of a reply but with a sultry twist of her head she threw a wink towards the other guy who blushed crimson. The whole scene too perfect. Both of us giggled at his genuine embarrassment.
Almost in unison we began to pack our stuff and as we left I asked her if she wanted to stop and get a cup of coffee. With a nod we made our way to a trendy little campus coffee spot furnished with oversized stuffed chairs and loveseats. Dropping our books we crowded onto one of the loveseats as I got us a couple cappuccinos. Returning with my hands full I passed Andrea one of the cups as she teased;
"So you were sitting there wondering what I looked like naked, were you?" And how did I look?"
"Why, marvelous of course." I answered without missing a beat.
Normally, I am never this glib but tonight was a really good night.