I thought about what I would say to the doctor when I finally spoke to him. It's a weird conversation, I mean, it should be obvious. So, I decided to tell him the obvious. I decided to tell him the truth.
"I want my breasts to be larger and more conspicuous. I want men to look at my tits, not my face. I want to be able wear sheer bras and tops with very large, round breasts that stand up firm and high. I want my permanently hard nipples to show through my clothing. I want my nipples to always be hard, and more sensitive. I want big, puffy areoles. I saw a porn video once where a girl took off her padded bra and had these huge, pointed, puffy nipples underneath. I want that. When men get to see my tits naked, I want them to be amazed. I want it to be a real treat. When I remove my bra in front of someone, I don't want my tits to drop, I want them to remain firm and high. I want my tits to be the best they'll see in their entire lives. I want them to always remember my perfect, big, firm, round, smooth tits with sexy, big, puffy nipples."
That is exactly what I said to him. As the words came out of my mouth, I felt more and more empowered. It was as if I were finally taking control of something I was raised to believe I had no control over. When I started getting breasts as a girl I felt the inequity of the situation. It presented itself every day as a young girl. The girls at schools who were developing larger, more conspicuous breasts got more attention, had more control, commanded more admiration. The smart ones could mold that attention into respect and opportunity. The teacher called on them more. They got picked for cheerleading. Dance. Theatre. The ones who developed large breasts early and made bad choices with them ruined their lives, earned a bad reputation as being too "easy", got pregnant too early.
I know I have a good body and an average face, but if I have big, perfect tits, men will find me more appealing and it will improve my confidence and sex drive. My bra size was 34B. They looked nice, but my hips and butt are round and full and slightly out of scale with my tits. My nipples are smallish and don't protrude very far. I've seen girls with "puffies" and they look so erotic, so "reproductive", as if she is ready to mate. To reproduce. That is a turn-on.
I want my tits to jiggle noticeably when I walk in heels. When I lie on my back, I don't want my breasts to flatten out. I want tits like you see on girls in porn videos. When I lie down, I want my tits to still point upward, firm and high. The bigger my tits are, the smaller my waist will look, and my new tits will compliment my round, firm ass. My figure will look more feminine, more sexual, more reproductive.
I want men to get hard just from them hearing me say my bra size. When I tell them I am a "34B" that sounds just average, but a 34D is spectacular. As soon as you tell a man, "I'm a 34 D-cup" you have their attention. They just want to see your tits. To touch them. Suck them. Feel them as you ride their cock. On a dating website if I say, "I'm a 34D, 28, 34" that is going to get some attention. More attractive men, wealthier men. Men who are more confident and better sexual athletes. Even when I hear myself say, "I am a 34D", it makes me wet. I want to walk into a lingerie store and tell the girl, "I can barely fit into a 34D."
When I am riding a man, I want to be able to pull his head to my tits and make him suck my nipples. I want my tits to be firm enough so I can go braless and wear small bikini tops with no support. I want other girls to be jealous of my tits, to sneer and whisper about them "not being real". I want them to be conspicuous enough so that men know I got a boob job. I want them to know I made the extra effort and went through the discomfort and expense so I am a better fuck. I want my tits to make a statement about me and my sexuality.
Having bigger, firmer, rounder tits that sit up higher and are more conspicuous will give me greater self-confidence. It will make me more socially and sexually assertive, and open up new opportunities to me. It will make people remember me better and want to see me again.