Daniel Cullers has a reputation. He's the best portrait photographer in the tri-county area. But he also does glamour photography and artistic nudes and, in a conservative area of Indiana, that doesn't sit well with some people. When I made my decision, he was the one I chose.
I turned 18 three months before my high-school graduation. College in Michigan was slated for the fall. But before then, I had to act on what was becoming a compulsion. I had a need—a need to show myself to others. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't eliminate my desire to have people see me naked.
Boys have always looked at me. I'm pretty. My features are symmetrical and, as I went through puberty, my face and body drew more and more stares. It embarrassed me and, at the same time, gave me a sexual charge. I didn't flaunt my looks. I didn't dress naughty. But I couldn't hide my curves. By my senior year, I was having a hard time repressing the need to be seen. Still, I hadn't acted upon it. I didn't know how to do it safely and I wondered if I would be embarrassed or humiliated if I actually did.
I date, but petting is as far as I have gone. Many a time I masturbate with visions of exposing myself; not to unwilling people, but to friends and strangers alike that know what I want to do and want me to do it. I can't explain the thrill I get just thinking about it but, if you are like me, you know exactly what I mean. So, I knew that after my senior year, I was finally going to do it. I didn't know how but I absolutely knew that I would. The desire was just too much.
Figuring out what to do was hard. Finally, I thought about modeling for a photographer. It didn't take long to find out about Daniel. He's listed in the phone book and he has a website. His photos of women are wonderful; he can make the plainest of people look very erotic. But what intrigued me the most was that he conducts workshops a couple of times a year where, at most, twenty people can learn about glamour photography from him using a live model. What seemed to be unique about the workshops was that he likes to use women who have never modeled before so that his students can understand how to deal with a first-time model, who is usually a girlfriend or a wife.
When I called Daniel's studio, I was excited, knowing I was taking the first step to fulfill my desire. His receptionist set an appointment to meet Daniel a few days later. The studio is located in the next county, about thirty miles from my town. The drive over was pleasant enough but I couldn't stop imagining a scenario where I was the focus of attention for twenty amateur photographers. I just hoped that Daniel would find me to be the type of new model he was looking for.
Our meeting went very well. Daniel is a nice man, about my father's age, and very professional. He wanted proof that I was 18 and he asked me if my parents knew what I wanted to do. I told him that my mother had died nine years ago and that it was just my father and me and that I had not told him.
"Why didn't you tell him?" he asked.
"Because I'm an adult now and because I don't know how he would take it," I said.
"Are you ashamed or embarrassed?" he asked.
"No."
"You do know that this type of modeling requires nudity, don't you?"
"Yes," I said, trying to hide my excitement.
"Have you ever done this before?"
"No," I said, "but I think that I would enjoy it and that I could be good at it."
"I think that you might be, too," he said. "You have a pretty face and you seem to have good proportions." He asked me to stand and to walk around a bit, all the while looking carefully at my body. Then, he showed me some examples of shots done at previous workshops. "Can you do this type of modeling?"
"I know I can," I said, trying to sound as assured as I could.
"Ok, then, let's schedule you for our next workshop which is in three weeks." He smiled and walked me out to his receptionist who explained what I needed to bring to the shoot and when I needed to be there. I thanked them both and drove home more excited than I had been in a long, long time.
For the next three weeks, I searched the internet for anything I could find about glamour modeling and I looked at hundreds of glamour photos to see what poses I might try. Once, Dad told me that I seemed preoccupied about something but I just shrugged it off. My night-time orgasms grew stronger all the time.
Several days before the workshop, I told Dad that I would be away that Saturday getting stuff that I wanted to take to college with me. He said he was ok with it because he had something to do that day too. As the time drew nearer, I started to have some second thoughts. What if one of the participants knew me? Would he tell my father? What would Dad think of me? Who else would find out? What if I chickened out at the last moment? None of these, however, were enough to stop my desire to pose naked in front of a lot of cameras.
On Saturday, I drove over to Daniel's farm, about 45 miles away, just outside the town where his studio is located. For workshops, he uses his large barn and, weather permitting, the area outside. Some of the participants were already there when I arrived. I could feel their eyes on me as I entered the barn and was greeted by Daniel. He took me into a dressing room at the back.
"Well, Carrie, are you ready to do this?"
"Yes," I said, the excitement growing in me.
"Great!" he said. "I think you'll have fun with it." He opened a closet and pulled out a long silk robe. "You remembered not to wear underwear, didn't you?"
"Yes."
"Good. What I'd like you to do is to take off your clothes, let me take a look at you, and then put this robe on. Then, we'll talk about the details of today's workshop." He stared at me, waiting.
"Ok," I said to myself. "This is it." I unbuttoned my shirt, paused, and then quickly took it off. Daniel stared at my jiggling breasts as I moved around. I smiled at him as he raised his eyes to mine and then I reached for the zipper to my shorts. This time, I removed them more slowly as I kept looking at Daniel. I couldn't believe how turned on I was. I put my clothes on a chair and stood facing him. I was naked in front of a man for the first time in my life.
"You have a great body, Carrie. I think the guys out there will like you a lot. Now, if you could turn around slowly so I can check out your various angles and curves." My excitement just kept building. When I had made a complete turn, he handed me the robe and motioned for me to sit down in an armchair. The silk felt very good against my skin and I was starting to feel glamorous sitting there listening to him.
"Most of my models, Carrie, will readily admit that they do it not just for the money. They do it because they like to show themselves to others; it makes them hot. Would you say that that describes you as well?"
I could feel myself blushing. There was no use lying. "Yes," I said. "I have to admit that I've fantasized about this, about being naked in front of strangers. That's why I'm here, to live out a fantasy."
"Well, we can go as far with this as you like."
"What do you mean?"
"Some of my models just like to do glamour poses or art poses. Others are willing to get sexier with their poses. In a workshop setting like this, if you want to pose more sexily, you can. And you can do it safely. I won't let things get out of hand. You can have the photographers suggest poses or you can do just what feels comfortable for you or you can do both. So, it's up to you."
I thought for a moment. "How about if we see how things go? Since I've never done this before, I'm not sure how far I want to take this. Ok?"
"That's fine with me," Daniel said, smiling warmly. He was professional and protective at the same time. "Shall we go out there and get started?"
"Let's do it," I said, rising from my chair, "before I chicken out." We both chuckled at that comment as we walked out into the main barn area.
Instantly, I realized I could be in trouble. I recognized four older men who knew me and my father. And I saw two young men who had graduated a year ahead of me from high school and who knew me as well. They all seemed very surprised when they saw me, maybe even a little embarrassed. I tried to erase whatever shock was on my face as quickly as possible by nodding to them and smiling slightly. Then I turned my head to scan the other faces in the group.
"Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet our model for today, Carrie. Carrie's never done this before. That's why I chose her to help us out. I'll give you some tips on how to work with a new and inexperienced model because it's likely that your first model may very well fit that description. After a bit, I'll let you take over and pose Carrie as you wish. I expect we'll go for about 45 minutes and then we'll take a break. After the break, we'll have a second session that will last for about an hour."
I had a ton of butterflies inside me as I stood next to Daniel. The men kept looking from him to me and back again. I felt they were already undressing me and that made me horny and nervous at the same time. Daniel began his instruction by talking about etiquette and behavior toward the model. "Never touch the model without permission. Always respect her wishes. Develop a rapport by working at an easy pace. Involve the model in the creative aspects of the shoot." Then he turned to me.
"Okay, Carrie. Please remove your robe so I can tell these guys a couple of things about lighting." Everyone was looking at me, waiting for me to show myself to them. I untied the sash, inhaled deeply, and took off my robe. Daniel placed it on a chair several feet from where I stood, naked, with nowhere to hide. I can't tell you how excited I felt being on display. It was so much more than I had imagined and I knew then that I had done the right thing.
Suddenly, I was aware of Daniel speaking. "The first thing to do is to look at your model. Study her. Help her get used to you observing every part of her body." I stared off into space, trying to control the sensations coursing through me. "Note the shapes and curves that you see," he said. As he spoke, he used his hands to point out the roundness of my breasts, the shifting line of my hips, and the muscle definition of my thighs. He didn't touch me but his hands were close enough that I could feel their warmth.
"Make a quarter turn, Carrie, please," he said. I did and Daniel continued to point out the shapes and curves. Then, he had me turn my back to the men and he asked them to look at that side of me. After another quarter turn and some comments, Daniel told me to face the front again. I'd been nude for about five minutes already. Then, Daniel had me make the turns again, this time as he used a light to cast some shadows on my body. Five more minutes passed by as the men kept looking at me. I wanted them to. I wanted to be seen.
