--- Saturday ---
What a run of events! This shoulda been a simple workshop for a sales team. However, it had turned into a totally different thingie. Actually, I had never experienced a more strenuous day. Worse than the stress, however, had been running into my fellow college alumni, aka my classmates from hell, 'cause they had found out about my new career and basically turned me into a pornstar. Umph!
I had tried my bestest to keep them in the dark so they wouldn't recognize me. In the end, however, my own mistake had exposed me. Oopsie! Anyway, I really didn't have the time or the mental capacity to process the meaning and the consequences of my blown cover, what with my former classmates and their frat buddies in the know.
Instead, I was mostly occupied with retrieving my gift. Remember? I had lost the slut battle to Shelly in the unfairest way ever. Nonetheless, Ortega had granted me a second chance to earn two pity points by entertaining the two sales champions. That was why I had given a special yoga session for Sharkboy and earned a ring as trophy. Mr. Weasel, the second sales champion, however, had handed his ring to Mr. Alum who had lost it in my ass. So complicated! So tricky!
No matter what, I desperately needed to get the ring outta there 'cause proof. That was why I remained in the back alley for a coupla more minutes, literally treasure hunting. Tihi! Bad thingie, I couldn't simply fish it out with my fingers 'cause bling-bling. What if I lost a ring from my finger in there, right? That was why I ended up kneeling on the ground, pushing and pressing and doing whatsoever to squeeze the ring from my ass chute.
FRRRTTT!
Oh my gawd! Finally! The ring basically plopped from my wrinkled dirtstar with a mixture of a loud pop and noisy fart. Gasp! Farting in public was ultra humiliating, so much so that my heart skipped a beat while I hastily looked up and down the alleyway. Fortunately, nobody was around to hear or watch me do that ultra degrading stuff. Phew!
More fortunately, the adult convention had closed so the security guards had finished work. As they weren't standing at the hotel entrance any longer, I could enter without problems. First step taken! Yay!
As second step, I had to find Ortega and present the two rings to him. After all, the out-please-ment center wasn't over 'cause me and Shelly were tied now. There had to be some kinda decisive endgame or some other thingie to select the winner, which would be me, of course. Duh!
Why? Cause I felt like I was finally ready to compete on the level necessary to succeed. After all, the last hours had literally shown one thingie as clear as day. Consultant-me was a huge hindrance and a total drag and a real pain in the ass. By comparison, Bimbo-me was a total booster and super fun and the life of the party. Putting it like that, the decision sounded really easy. Kinda surprising that it had taken me so long to realize it. Yet, you know what they say about me and a box of rocks, right? Anyway, it seemed like the realization had fully sunk in by now 'cause there were no more sharp protest or snide remarks from Consultant-me, only giggling from Bimbo-me.
Basically, it meant that there wasn't a thingie holding me back anymore. Yay! Literally, it meant that I was free to enjoy any kinda fun without shame. Yay! Yay! Mostly, it meant that I could finally be the bestest, most fun version of myself. Yay! Yay! Yay!
First thingies first, though. I still had to take the second step and find Ortega. That wasn't really so difficult. Actually, I didn't have to think about it twice. Of course, the smug Latino had booked a suite for himself. When I reached the room, I heard some strange noises coming from inside, which kinda surprised me. When I knocked on the door, it took ages for anyone to open, which surprised me that much more. When Ortega finally opened, he stuck his head out for a second only. Before I knew what was going on, he had closed the door again, which surprised me the most.
What the heck was going on here? What the fudge was my boss doing that late?
No matter the time, the smug Latino made me wait! He really made me stand outside his suite without a thingie to do but wait for him. I literally felt like some peasant who needed her king to grand her an audience. Un-fudging-believable!
I was getting more annoyed and more bugged and more irritated by the second here. I was getting more stressed out and worked up and vexed by the moment here. Super edgy! Super testy! Finally, the door opened again. Even though there was nobody greeting me, the door remained open. Super agitated, I rushed inside. And stopped on the spot.
Ortega wasn't alone!
He was with Wilson and Anderson. Remember the two dudes? The fat, middle-aged committee member who had organized the reward workshop and his bald, middle-aged buddy who had fucked me before and after the workshop.
That wasn't all, though. Shelly was there too!
What the fudge was she doing here? Truth be told, it was totally obvious 'cause the three men were bare naked and the blonde bitch was kneeling on the floor only wearing the dudes' cum on her face. No way! No fudging way!
"Sorry, but you're too late to join the party, I'm afraid." Ortega told me from behind. "Indeed, what's your business so late, ditzy doll?"
I was way too blindsided to respond, so my boss had to repeat his question. When I finally managed to shake off my stupor, I presented the two rings I had earned from the sales champions. Even though my mood was kinda dampened from Shelly's unexpected presence, my enthusiasm quickly returned when I presented the bling-bling. That was why I waved my beringed hands in fronta Ortega's face, almost jumping on the spot in excitement.
"Congratulations, I have to say!" The smug Latino gave me an approving nod. "I bet you worked hard to earn those points indeed."
"However, as you see, your fellow assistant was busy too." He added. "Shelly earned two more points in the meantime. Frankly, these two managers count double as they are more important than the sales champions, I'm afraid."
Please what?!? Say again?!? I totally must have misheard. Shelly had scored another two points 'cause private hotel party? You gotta be kidding me! Shelly's points were more valuable 'cause managers? You gotta be shitting me!
This couldn't be happening! This had to be some kinda bad dream! Any moment, I was about to wake up with a smile on my face, 'cause I had won the out-please-ment center and saved my job. I was just about to ask Ortega to pinch me to wake me up but he beat me to it.
"Hence, the final results are available, I can announce." He remarked. "We have a winner indeed! Congratulations, Shelly, to this comprehensive and decisive victory, I have to say!"
Holy fudge! It was true. All my efforts had been in vain! All the action at the sexpo had been futile. All the exposure to my former classmates had been for naught. Totally cruel! Totally unfair!
Bad thingie, Ortega hadn't told me about Shelly's opportunity to score more points. Worse thingie, he hadn't clarified the different values for managers and salesmen. Worst thingie, I had fucked Anderson before and after the workshop without receiving points for it. What a raw deal!
I was so ready to throw a hissy fit and a temper tantrum. I was so ready to have a blaze of anger and burst of fury. The super blatant injustice was burning on my skin. The super brutal inequality was making my blood boil.
"Aw ditzy doll, look at the bright side, I suggest." My boss beat me to it once more. "You earned more rings than you can count. All things considered, you're a winner, too."
Um... was he being sarcastic or ironic? I couldn't tell. Actually, I couldn't really discern it anyway 'cause bimbo brain. Duh! No matter what, it made me pause. In a way, it sounded kinda logical 'cause I really liked my new bling-bling. Besides, you should literally never ever look a gift horse in the mouth, right?
By default, I caught myself staring at my beringed hands all giddy and giggling all joyfully. That was all Ortega needed as feedback 'cause he took it as my admission of defeat. At least, the issue was closed and concluded for him with that. I can't believe I'm about to say this, but I guess I had just lost my job and become a free agent. Holy moly!