I'm getting less and less time to write. I'd appreciate any feedback to keep me going.
*****
Rules
1. Always naked in the apartment. When April is there, single item of clothing. Jane decides clothing. No more than two items of clothing allowed at any time.
2. Top to show cleavage and midriff, skirt to be no longer than 5 inches, the shortest in the room.
3. Every morning get a dare from the forum, make it more humiliating, and invite a person to the forum every day.
4. When G has sex with anyone, even when she gives pleasure, she'll always be naked, with her clothes nowhere inside four walls. If she's having sex outdoors, she'll crumple each item of clothing into a tight ball, close her eyes, spin on spot until disoriented and throw her clothes in a random direction with all her might. She'll repeat this with all her clothing, one at a time until she's naked and then spin around a couple of times and then open her eyes to get down to business.
*********
It was 10 O'clock now. The past couple of hours were probably the best of my adult life. I mean, I was not a virgin, but the sex I'd had previously was nothing compared to what happened tonight. I would remember each orgasm, each feeling and touch for a long time to come. But the most pervading memory would be of this girl lying next to me.
Carrie was the most beautiful person in the world to me right now. I was lying down in the cubby hole of her right arm in the bed that was collapsed from the wall of her apartment, my head resting on her chest. The bed blocked most of the apartment once extracted. We could either step out onto the bathroom on one side, or out the door on the other. Stepping out, however was the last thing on either of our minds.
I was comfortably nestled on her shoulder, her flat chest barely blocking my view of her poster rich walls. She was cupping and kneading my breasts alternately, while looking up at the ceiling. We were silent for long periods of time now. We were done with all the talking we had to do between the first time and the second times. My face was absolutely coated with her essence, and her hands were too. Jane, her rules, the forum and my sluttish behavior over the past few days were far from my mind.
"So.. " She broke the silence. I didn't even look up. She took a deep breath. I suddenly tensed. I knew she was going to broach the uncomfortable topic. "What's the deal between you and Jane?"
My face clouded. I was expecting this. And I had no answer. Believe me, I had given this particular question a lot of thought. But it was not something I wanted to talk about now. I wanted to retain this pleasant feeling for as long as possible.
"Nothing, especially." I said, in an offhand manner. "Jealous?" I smirked at her, looking up. I saw from the look on her face that I had said the wrong thing.
"Are you really as slutty as you behave in public? Or is it something that Jane puts you up to?"
She replied brutally.
I exhaled. I had to come clean. But to what extent?
"Carrie, you are the only person who has made me come since my ex boyfriend. Is that enough for you? I really don't want to talk about this right now." I said as firmly as I dared.
It turned out it wasn't enough for her. "Why were you bottomless in Jared's that day? In broad daylight. You were scared and nervous. And that Jane was fully clothed. Weren't you afraid of getting arrested? Weren't you embarrassed? Don't call that excuse you were wearing that day a skirt-" she pressed.
I bit my lower lip. She wasn't really admonishing me. She was just bewildered. Which was completely understandable, I guess.
"I mean, it was smaller than the one you wore today for heaven's sake. And today, pretty much everybody in Roger's could see your bits with some effort. Why the extreme lack of modesty?" I didn't know how to answer her questions. More importantly, I still clung to the warm glow that suffused my chest.
"Carrie, it is all part of some dares and games I'm playing with Jane at the moment." I just came clean. She, for her part, was hiding her disappointment and shock very well. "If you want, I'll stop."
I looked at her obstinately, as if daring her to ask me to stop.
"Is she -" Carrie opened her mouth, after a long pause.
"No Carrie." I replied, letting off a deep breath. I had decided to stop beating myself mentally for my kinkiness, and I certainly wasn't going to put the blame on Jane. "I was telling you the truth that day. I get off on this. I guess I am a submissive exhibitionist, who gets off on being put in some situations. I know, I am a freak. I can stop being a freak for you Carrie, but not immediately. Not tomorrow. I need some time"
She watched me for a full minute, reading every micro-expression on my face. I stubbornly stared back at her.
"I don't believe you." She said suddenly. I was jolted to my depths. Partly, I guess because she got up, quite abruptly. I arrested the fall of my head, which suddenly felt the support of her shoulder go missing, and got up. My heart was racing.
"Which bit?" I croaked.
She didn't reply. "Let's get you home." She said gruffly, pulling up her pants. I felt like Carrie was metaphorically slapping me on my face. It hurt.
----
The next morning I woke up at five. I didn't remember a lot of what happened after Carrie gruffly brushed me aside and dropped me off in my apartment, except that she wouldn't speak a word or reply to me. It was heart breaking.
I had tried to take my mind off it by preparing more tougher questions for the test today. In the end I had sobbed myself to sleep over my laptop.
I don't know why I insisted on telling her the truth about why I was doing this. I could have easily told Carrie that Jane was forcing me to do this. God knows what would have happened if I had done that. Carrie would have confronted Jane, that much was certain. Maybe then, I could have got free of my own crazy will to subjugate myself to Jane's crazy wishes, rules and games.
I imagined what life would be then. It was hardly three days since I started playing by Jane's rules, and it was already an overarching feature of my life. I shuddered briefly at the thought of having to imagine a life without Jane.
However, without Jane, I wouldn't have gone on a date with Carrie. I wouldn't have realized I was lesbian, or at the very least bisexual.
I softened as I sat on the couch, wrapped in blankets as I remembered the date. We made a lot of love. We didn't have sex, we made love. We'd repeatedly brought each other off, me with my mouth and she with her huge hand and fingers.
She was the big butch Domme and I was the small Femme sub. I liked the concept which had so far been but a tiresome cliche to me. My nipples were erect at all the reminiscing. As I looked down at my large(and amazing, as I had been reliably informed by Carrie several times yesterday) breasts pointing sharply at the window which was gradually lit up by the creeping dawn, I blushed. I spent ages reliving the night.
I imagined then of coming out to my parents, my sister. I scared myself properly. But the image of Carrie persisted, pushing thoughts of my parents aside. I could delightfully imagine spending the rest of my life with Carrie, nestled in her cuddle, the pretty small spoon who'd be her ornament to show off in pubs and parties.
But then, she had to go and spoil it all. She wouldn't listen to me. Neither would she accept me for who I was, nor would she give me enough time to stop my games with Jane. I was bitter and broken by the end of my reverie, and it was nearly six.
Finally, I pushed all thoughts of Carrie off my mind and focused on who I had. Jane. My adrenalin pumped as I thought of my rules and the forum. It faintly occurred to me over my raging hormones and excitement that I was looking forward to the horrible business of embarrassing myself. Well, I thought to myself. It has been established in detail that I am very very sick. And kinky.
I quickly took a shower and dried off. I then made some pancakes and omelettes and went up to check the forum, with the an air of dread, excitement and extreme arousal. I opened the door slightly to see a lump on the mattress. I also heard a lot of snoring. Jane seemed to have bundled up all her pillows and seemed to be cuddling them. I pushed away the memory of yesterday night that brought a pang to my heart.
I tiptoed to the computer and booted it, silently cursing the whir it made. The snores didn't diminish. I rubbed my hands together and waited for the machine to boot nervously.
As quickly as I could, I opened the forum and logged in to it. I slowly digested the change in the opening page. My jaw dropped as I saw more details. One thing was sure, Jane hadn't been idle yesterday when I was out humiliating myself in class.
First thing was the the new opening page of the forum, with a huge sticky note with all my rules on it. The rules were the same four rules that she had handed me in a sheet of paper. Except for the third one, which now read:
3. G should invite a person to the forum every day, and obey the first five instructions that any member in the forum gives you as quickly as possible. The instructions can be of any form, and must start with "G will".
I had completely forgotten that I let her choose the demerit for me, by exchanging two demerits for one.
It was incredible how I could go from scared to aroused and back again within seconds in this frightening manner. This was getting more and more out of hand. But boy, was I excited.
Kinky G was loving this, flooding good sense out of my head with hormones. I was going to place myself in the hands of anybody in the forum. Horny old G was rubbing her pussy as I thought about the ramifications.
While my mind was wildly churning random thoughts, my vision subconsciously roamed over the forum's new unfamiliar layout. My eyes arrested themselves over a big number on the top right, sharply focusing and jarring me out of my thought train.
34. That was the number of members in the forum now. 34. I remembered it being around 10 or 11. There were now thirty fucking four people with access to my nude pics and videos. Jane was actually spending time and effort on this forum. It then occurred to me that she was not doing this alone. I remember the ominous "I had some help" from her, yesterday. I felt quite sick.
I slowly dragged the mouse to see who all the new members were, struggling to keep from shivering. Of course, there were Greg and Alicia. And then all the members of Jane's class. Well, nearly all. My heart pounded, waves of panic crashing against my throat. Today was Jane's class.
It was quite obvious that Jane had given out an invite to the forum to her class. I furiously looked up and down the list. Quickly, to my utter relief, I could immediately count at least 5 girls who were missing. Not everyone in the class was in the forum. This was important because it slightly allayed my fears of being made to appear nude in the class. I knew it was not beyond Jane, and the thought had wildly excited and scared me. I wondered if that would happen today. "G will strip down" seemed unlikely today.
I went back to the posts. I saw the large number of comments about the video I uploaded of me and Greg and Alicia. I was about to open the post to read them when I saw the next post.
Dare #1.
My pulse raced as the mouse pointer raced ahead to click on it. I clicked it open and read it.
And re-read it.
What a disappointment. This seemed very tame.
What was wrong with me.