Hey folks, it's been a while. Here's a shortie I'm throwing in exhibitionism, even though it has elements of sci-fi, I guess. It doesn't get very hard; just a one-off, little office adventure.
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Laney Meiers and Jill Princeton were quietly finishing up their lunch, as David left the kitchen. Jill leaned in to Laney, "Should you tell him, or I?"
"Tell him what?"
"That he needs to return those new glasses he bought. They make his eyes look freaky, and they're so heavy and thick. And what's with the tint, when he only wears them indoors?"
Laney chuckled, "He never wears them outside the office, does he? Now that you mention it, he always swaps to his old pair when he goes out."
"He looks like a dork, and if a client comes in, seeing him like that..."
"When did he get those glasses? Like a month ago?"
"Probably."
"The Lamstrom brothers came in yesterday, and David was wearing his old glasses when he met with them. Last week, when Dr. Turner stopped by, he was also wearing the old ones."
"So he doesn't wear those freakishly, stupid-looking things when clients come by. He must know it makes him look ridiculous. Is he just trying to provoke a response from us or something?"
"He was wearing them when Alice, the delivery girl, swung by yesterday."
"Oh yeah, he's always around in the lobby when she shows up. Big tits bouncing and all."
"You gotta have some competition, Jill," said Laney, teasing her buxom coworker. "I dunno. Maybe those glasses are hi-tech and help him see better around the office. It is poorly lit, after all."
"Yeah, maybe. I just don't want him to embarrass himself, considering how fashionable he is."
"Come on, Jill. They're just glasses. It ain't that big a deal." Laney knew her colleague was a fitness and fashion freak, more than anyone. Hell, Jill got upset when Laney's nail polish started fading last week, so it was no stretch that ill-fitting, ugly glasses irked her nerves. Later that afternoon, David stopped by the two's office to let them know he was going out for a drink with a client and to not expect him back. "Who you boozin' up this time?" asked Laney.
"Keith Olson."
Laney shrugged, having no idea who Keith Olson was. Instead, she was taking some degree of joy from watching her colleague on the brink of losing her shit. The whole time David was talking, Jill couldn't keep her eyes off the hideous goggles on David's face. It wasn't just that the rims were ridiculously thick, the glasses made his eyes look twice bigger than they actually are, even behind the strange tint. It's very off putting, even to Laney, and Jill desperately wanted to say something. Laney waved her down, hoping she wouldn't invite trouble. David finally went back to his office and a half hour later, left the office for good. Jill scoffed when the door closed behind him. "Does this mean we can go home early, too?"
Laney chuckled, "I wish. Probably not a great idea."
Then a spark lit up in Jill's eyes. David left his office door open when he left for the day, and when Jill turned to Laney, she happened to notice the glasses laying on his desk. She shot up on her feet. "Maybe leaving early isn't a great idea, but I know what is!"
"Huh?" asked Laney, as Jill dashed past her, into David's office. "What are you doing?"
Jill snatched the heavy glasses off the desk and rushed back up front. "I think 'accidentally' losing a pair of glasses would be a great idea, what do you think?"
This time, Laney shot up. "Jill! Come on, you cannot be so stressed by this, that you want to steal David's things."
"Not steal. Just say I place them somewhere hard to find..." (Like the trash, she was thinking.) She held the ugly glasses up in the air. "How could anyone see this at the optometrist and think, 'Yeah... great design.'?"
Laney laughed. "You're right. I don't see how those would look good on any face."
"Oh, yeah?" joked Jill, whipping the glasses open and plopping them over the bridge of her nose. The act stopped her in her tracks, and she literally forgot how to breathe for a moment. Laney laughed louder now, shaking her head fast, "Not even you can make them work, Jill. You look like a clown."
Jill whispered, "Laney."
"I mean, kind of like a remorseful clown, but still a clown."
"Laney," she spoke a little louder.
"Try pulling your hair up. I want to take some pictures."
"Laney!" Jill shouted.
"What?"
"How long have you had that unicorn tattoo?"
When Laney graduated high school, she had a unicorn tattooed on her inner left breast, near her nipple.It was meant to be sexy, with the raised hoof of the mythical creature just touching her areola. The only people that knew about it were boyfriends. "Wh... what?" she asked Jill. "Tattoo?"
"The one there," Jill pointed directly at it, though it was under her clothes.
"Wait. How did you know?"
Then Jill screamed, "That motherfucker has been looking at us naked. STARK naked!"
"What?" asked Laney, confused.
Jill threw the glasses at her Laney, who snatched them up. "No way. This can't be..." She raised them to her face, turning to Jill, shocked to see her coworker's completely nude body, fit, firm and buxom. "These are x-ray glasses."
"No shit," shouted Jill. "REAL ones. I mean, how the fuck??"
Laney pulled the glasses off, and read an inscription on the inner ear. "Phantom Physics." A closer look at the glasses revealed they weren't meant for show at all. The thick frames and weird lenses housed microchips and tiny wires. Laney rushed over to her computer, pulling up the company's obscure website. "You have to set up an account just to access their catalog," she huffed. However, Laney was practiced and quickly went through the process using an alternate account. "No. Fucking. Way," Laney gasped, when she finally found what she was looking for.
"What?" said Jill.
Laney turned to her, "Remember when Dave said we couldn't afford a bonus this year, and to just be happy we got the one week's paid vacation?"
"Yeah?"
"These glasses supposedly see through any fabric. For the low, low price of twenty-six thousand dollars."
"What?" Jill screamed.
"That's what these cost him, Jill. He could afford to throw down 26k to see us naked, but he doesn't have money for a bonus? In the old days, we both would have gotten over three thousand dollars for our performance bonuses." Laney seemed more furious about the money, than the fact David had seen the two naked, and she was convincing Jill it was all the more reason to be furious with him.
Jill whispered, "Oh, yeah. I can't wait to see him tomorrow."
Laney thrust her hand up. "No. Wait. We don't tell him."
"Don't tell him? Are you nuts?"
"Follow me on this..."
***
"Hey David, can we see you a minute?" Laney asked, just as the boss walked in the next morning. He was wearing his old, stylish glasses and stopped.