CH1
One of the nice things about being a nerd is you usually don't give a shit what others think of you. You have heard it all from them and your skin has gotten fairly thick. I knew mine was. Oh, I'm David Lesore, yeah, a French grandparent or great or something. Anyway, so the name did not help, Sore Ass, Sore Shit, French Fuck, yeah, I've been called it all. After a while you just ignore it, or you go mad. And I'm not planning on going insane any time soon.
So, anyway, there I am minding my own nerdy business, looking at a game on my phone, while taking a break from entering in data at the company I work at, and this vision walks up to my desk. I mean total OMG fucking vision. She was at least five feet four, C, drooling saying this, maybe D cup, athletic build with strawberry blonde hair that looked natural, not out of a bottle. About 25 or so, a couple of years younger than me. And I was her target, my desk, me, she wanted to talk to me.
"Sir, can you help me with this issue I am having on my computer. I understand you do that sort of thing" came from the visions mouth. Of course, I barely was registering, since I was falling out of my chair as I was trying to stand up. Upon standing I realize that she was affecting me slightly, Mr. Wood was trying to make himself noticed, so I kind of had to hunch to hide his appearance, which made it look like I was about to hurl, leaning over, mouth open, drool coming from my lips, dazed look in my eyes. Yea, definite hurl look.
The vision quickly backed up a step to clear a path of the impending hurl she saw coming and squeaked out "Yuck."
Moments go by while I am trying to collect myself, remember nerd, doesn't know how to talk to anything in this league. Not saying I'm not a great listener, I just usually say stuff like 'that's fucking stupid bitch' after being told something about how a mother is treating a daughter wrong or something like that. Not proud of it, but I blame my peers. I heard that from them whenever I said something similar, so I figured that is what is said in all instances. EEEHHH wrong answer.
Finally getting it together in front of the goddess, I lean back and slowly ask, "How I may help you miss?"
Seeing that I was not going to hurl but still worried that it was still possible, the goddess again asked about helping with her computer. About that time, she saw I was trying to hide my rising Woody which caused her to make a face and begin to turn away as if this was a huge mistake.
"Wait, please show me what you have going on, I can help, but I have to go to your workstation."
Another squeak "Okay" and still keeping her distance and thinking I am now a leper or pervert, the goddess turns and moves towards her cubicle and the computer there, keeping an eye back at me in case I tried to jump her or something.
Woody slowly went away but it was still ready for instant action from watching that ass walk in front of me. It did not move, it undulated. It shimmied. It rippled with every step. I tried really hard to not stare. I knew my job was on the line here. I was also working on excuses for how I greeted her, anything to allow me to keep her there in the cubicle while I was helping her, versus her bolting for security or my boss, I'm not sure which was worse.
Arriving at her cubicle, I saw the goddess' name was Jennifer Warren and that she was part of the chemical analysis team here. The cubicles have the name plaque with the few letters denoting area they worked in. Once you had been there for a while it was easy to figure out where someone worked from their plaque. Asking her to sit down I began asking her what she had been working on when the issue came up. "Ms. Warren, can you show me what you were doing, and I'll try to diagnose what you have the issue with."
"Yes, it was in this excel file, I was adding in these equations when it started popping up all of these questions about translations and such and won't add the equations for me to derive the analysis I am working on."
"This file you have open now?"
"Yes"
"May I sit and try for a bit and see what may have happened? And have you saved your work; in case we need to go back?"
"Yeah, its saved."
"Okay, let me sit there for a bit and I'll see what I can find. It usually is a result a miss entry or something running in the background."
Working my magic, I quickly found the issue with the file and got her equations entered for her.
"Thank you, sir."
"David."
"David, you helped a lot. I was considering restarting from this morning and that would put me way behind on getting this done before five tonight. And I'm sorry about my looks earlier, but I thought you were distressed or something."
"Jennifer, I apologize, you caught me with gum in my mouth and I swallowed it standing up and had a bad reaction to doing that. If you have any more problems, you know where to find me. Have a nice day."
Lying is not bad, right? I mean it was only to keep me from crashing and burning. So, I hope lightning doesn't smite me as I am riding my bike home. Returning to my desk I finished up my work and left for the day. I usually leave around four because of needing to ride my bike, as in bicycle to work and home. Cars and bikes are still not friendly out there and beating the rush hour traffic is the way to go. It made it a drag getting there earlier than most people, but it also kept me in shape, three miles one way to work on city streets, not too shabby I thought.
What I did not know was that Jennifer showed up in my cubicle about forty minutes after I left. She had more problems and was hoping for more help and did not know enough people yet to give her a hand. The company we work for has an IT department, they try, but their main focus is the servers we have. They don't have computer support knowledge per se, they could talk you through how to install software and such, but getting into the programs we use every day, not too much. Hence the reason why my name keeps coming up around the area whenever someone's computer crashes. There have been a few times when I've had to talk to my boss about that, needing to make sure she let everyone know my priorities, whether it was fix computers that day or get the area data entered for the different projects we had ongoing. She was okay to talk to about that kind of shit and understood when I had to 'help' someone out. It was part of my unwritten job description. You know the one where you also need to get coffee for the boss or hold Joe blow supervisor's hand while he is working with a program because Joe can't tie his shoes but is the boss of twenty people. Yeah, those job functions.