I'd never been to a nude beach, and had always wanted to try it. I finally got the opportunity one weekend when my friend Misty (her real name, honest) invited me. Misty and I do NOT have a sexual relationship, and have never seen each other naked. We have been friends almost from childhood, and have known each other for nearly 25 years. We talk regularly by phone, and there is nothing that we cannot tell each other. Even things we don't tell our spouses. We are always there for each other. This makes for a bit of jealousy on the part of the significant others, but , basically, we assure them that all is platonic (which is true), and then we tell them to fuck off.
I knew that Misty and her husband would visit a nude beach once or twice a year, and although I was, of course, deeply curious, and asked a lot of questions, I could never get up the nerve to partake, and I certainly would never broach the subject to my wife, who is about as fond of risk taking as a chipmunk.
My wife was off at a conference in Toledo, and Misty's husband was busy studying for his law boards (a late career change for him). He was more tolerant of our relationship than my wife was, so he had no problem when Misty suggested that she would try to coerce me into joining her at the nude beach on Saturday.
Successfully coercing me was another story. She called me on Saturday morning about 8:30. I was headed out for yard sales.
She said, "I'll make it quick: I'm going to Sanders beach today, and I'd like you to join me."
I knew of Sanders beach, so I responded "Misty, you know how I feel about that. I respect your need to show off your body, and watch the naked folk parade around, pretending to be oh so nonchalant, but it is not for me. I'd rather be out trying to add to my collection of Star Wars Figurines."
I can talk to Misty this way, which is why I love her so much. She did an LOL, and responded,
"Yep, when I mentioned it to Jay, he said he knew that you would wimp out."
Silence.
Man, I may love Misty, but sometimes I want to strangle her. She knows that I cannot abide a dare, and I certainly resent being called a wimp (mainly because I am one).
"Look, Misty, I'm going to yard sales, and that's final," and I was certain that I sounded utterly unconvincing.
"OK," she responded, "I'll pick you up at 10:30 when you're done. We'll get there by 11:00, in plenty of time for the good midday sun."
I thought "homina, homina, homina", but what I said was, "you are twisting my arm, and I don't like it, but I'll do it just to shut you up."
"See you then," she laughed, and hung up.
I went to yard sales, found nothing, went home, packed a beach bag (do I take or do I not take a bathing suit? I took one just in case), and waited until 10:30. Prompt as usual, Misty pulled up in her BMW 328i convertible, top down, her hair blowing freely. Did I tell you that Misty inherited wealth, and not a small amount of wealth, either? A whole lot of wealth. Which is why Jay could spend 3 years not working while he became a lawyer. And one of the reasons, besides the fact that I loved her, that it was so much fun spending time with Misty. She paid for everything (don't tell her I said that).
In the car, I admitted to being nervous as hell. My 6 pack abs long ago became one pack, a rather protruding one pack I might add. And of course I worried about what every man in who has ever gone to a nude beach has worried about: will I get an erection? Misty laughed.
"On occasion a man does get a woody on the beach. We regard that as just a normal hormonal reaction, and of course it does go down,"
(special warning for you men out there: don't ever take a Viagra before going to the nude beach)
"and everything returns to normal. But you will be surprised at how quickly you will find public nudity to be so natural and liberating that you will wonder how you lived without it."
"That's easy for you to say, since you still have the body of Scarlett Johansson. Life is SO unfair."
At just after 11:00, we arrived at the beach. The parking lot was nearly full, which surprised me in that I didn't think there would be hundreds of naked people. I was hoping for more like dozens. Misty laughed at the look on my face.
"These cars are mostly for the main beach. You have to walk past a sign that says 'Warning: Nude beach beyond this point.' Only about 30 or 40 people typically go to the nude area."
I was SO glad I had brought a bathing suit. We changed in the changing rooms, and met outside. Misty was wearing a black two-piece bathing suit that left little to the imagination, with a thong bottom, and a top with two small triangles. I've tried not to think of Misty in a sexual way, but she was making it difficult.
She caught me ogling her, and said "relax, you're going to see the full monty in a few minutes. Just try to control yourself."
We walked along the beach, with all the paraphernalia we needed: umbrella, cooler, etc. The beach was full of screaming kids, fat women, bald men, and lobster red adolescent girls. I remembered why I hate the beach.
We came to the dreaded sign, and passed it without comment. I saw no one beyond the sign, and asked the obvious question.
She answered, "Richard, use your brain. If the nude beach started right past the sign, you'd have all the fat old guys and pimply teenagers staring with their mouths open."
Good point.
We walked for quite awhile until we came to a curve in the beach. As we rounded the curve, I was confronted with nudes-a-poppin'. Well, not really poppin'. More like laying there absorbing rays, and walking primly along the water. The only poppin' was the people playing volleyball, and that was more like bouncin' than poppin'.
It's amazing how many different body types there are. Naturally, I found myself staring discreetly at the hottest bodies, but I also found it fascinating how people looked so free, no matter how old/fat/wrinkled they were. This was not what I had expected, and I felt it would be easy to control my natural impulse to poke a woody into the nearest hot babe.
We reached a spot a short distance from the nearest people, and spread a blanket. Misty turned away from me, and removed her top, then her bottom, turned back, and asked me to put lotion on her back. Just like that. Clothed, then naked, with nary a hesitation. And I can tell you that she was even more perfect naked than in clothes.
She said "Well, get out of that suit, and enjoy yourself."
I turned away, at which point I was facing an attractive couple in their 40's about 12 feet away. The man was on his back, his dick hanging limp, reading, while the woman was on her side, facing me, a towel under her head, her breasts hanging to one side, her right leg pulled up over her left. She gave me a wink and smiled. No, she was not flirting, it's just that I might as well have had a giant sign on me that said "Newbie."
I took my shirt off, and then, with nowhere else to turn, I removed my suit and stood naked, facing the woman. She smiled again and mouthed the word "welcome." I smiled back and turned to Misty to lather her up.
Before laying down, Misty looked me up and down, and said "I approve."
"Shut up," I said, and she laughed.
Lying face down on the blanket, she closed her eyes and said "so get with it, already."
I squirted some SPF 4000 on my hands and began to massage her legs, her back, her neck, her arms,
"and don't forget my ass, you ass."
So I did it. This was such a turn on, but I was determined to keep my cock in check. Misty turned over on her back, and that did me in. My cock sprung up, but since she had her eyes closed, she didn't see, and the people nearby weren't looking. I began to oil her legs, arms, thighs, stomach,
"and if you don't put lotion on my tits, I will be highly insulted."
So I did. As I moved along her body, my cock accidently touched her side. She burst out laughing, got up on her elbow, and stared at my wood.
"Well, Richard, I am going to accept that as the highest possible complement. Then if it doesn't go down in a minute, I'm going to whack it hard from side to side with my hand until it DOES go down."
I was blushing so much that I was sure I needed no sun in order to emulate a tan.
"Misty, you can be a real fucking pain. I've never seen you naked, and your body is spectacular, so what did you expect? You really should have given me more warning than just the standard lecture."
She replied, "remember the old joke, if I told you that you have a great body, would you hold it against me? I'm quite sure you said that to me many times when we were in 8th grade. Now get back to work. I still need lotion on my face and shoulders."
I finished greasing her up, and she said "Now you."
I laid face down, and she started oiling me all over, and I mean ALL over. I couldn't help but notice how her hands kept straying to my thighs, then my inner thighs. I was getting hard again, and she knew it, the fucking cock tease.
"Now turn over."
"Shit, Misty, I can't."