This contains elements of cuck queen / size queen and cock worship (amongst others represented by categorization and tags). I don't recommend reading further if you dislike these concepts.
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"I'm so frustrated. I can't remember the last time I've been with a guy that had an impressive penis," Andrea lamented on our zoom video call.
"I can. It was this morning," Katie responded with a somewhat smug tone. I shifted my focus to Katie from the TV I was playing Nintendo Switch on, somewhat shocked by what she had just said.
"What, you mean Brian?" Andrea said somewhat mockingly.
"Yup"
"Yeah ok. Right," Andrea responded, rolling her eyes.
"Andrea, I'm serious," Katie responded decisively.
Here's some background. It was April of 2020, the midst of covid 19 virus, so we were all in quarantine. We (Andrea, my then girlfriend and now wife Katie, and myself) were having our weekly zoom cocktail meeting and had been drinking for about an hour and a half on the call. It was mostly their own conversation, but I had gotten in the habit of hanging out playing games next to Kate on the couch, joining in when I felt like it. In all honesty, I had one or two before we hopped on the call - it was a Sunday afternoon and with no prospects of having a social life anytime soon, I was content staying both at home and comfortably numb. I have no idea what Andrea's level of inebriation was, but the events that ensued makes me suspect Katie had indulged at least as much as I had.
Initially most people I knew, myself included, figured we'd be quarantining for a couple weeks, maybe a month at most. But the realization was setting in that we were in for a much longer haul than that as the infection rate had nearly tripled in such a short amount of time. Andrea had the unfortunate timing of becoming single a few weeks before everything locked down which of course meant dating was out of the question. Chris "Captain America" Evan's dick pick had recently leaked, which had somehow become the topic, and apparently met her definition of impressive.
Andrea was my girlfriend's coworker and friend at the time. It was easy to see that Katie harbored a bit of jealousy towards her at times. While I tend to prefer women like Katie, full figured and curvy with big tits and a big ass, Andrea is undeniably hot. She's a lithe 5 foot 5 inch tall brunette with long, thick dark brown hair and striking gray eyes, high cheekbones and luscious pink lips any guy would love to see wrapped around his cock. Above her flat stomach was what looked to me to be a firm C cup pair, and you could bounce a quarter off her ass. Katie on the other hand was a definite PAWG (Phat Ass White Girl for those who don't know), standing just shy of 5ft 4, with wide hips, a huge middle eastern ass, and large boobs which have grown from a small D to a solid DD, the bit of weight she had gained quarantining seemingly having gone completely to her bust. Andrea and I were the same age, two years older than Katie.
I think it was their contrasting figures that caused Katie to feel insecure at times. She was slightly ashamed of some recently gained weight, though to me she was still a knockout. Their personalities are also night and day from each other. Andrea's quite the extrovert, confident and never one to be shy about any subject, including her relatively high sex drive. This could get on Katie's nerves; she tended to shy away from those topics and generally had a more quiet demeanor. Their relationship always struck me as a bit odd, which involved in my opinion more sisterly-esque infighting, one-upmanship, and occasional bickering, than it did a genuine friendship.
Don't get me wrong, they mostly got along fine, but there always seemed to be this lurking need to prove something to one another. I do think their relationship had been more strained than usual due to the surge in healthcare needs, both being medical professionals that worked the same shift and unit day in and day out. Today Katie must've been fed up with her, she really wanted to stick it to Andrea. I just didn't expect her to talk like this to someone she sees on an almost daily basis, especially in front of me.
Katie of course wasn't lying to Andrea. She wasn't shy about loving my dick when it was just us two, but talking openly about it in front of friends was new territory. Despite being more or less oblivious to it for most of my life, I was by then well aware that I had some quite desirable equipment hanging between my thighs. I don't go around bragging or anything, I've never been the one to initiate these types of conversations, but I really don't care who knows either. And while "impressive" isn't really the first word that comes to my mind, I certainly have nothing to be ashamed of.
More specifically, that "impressive" equipment consists of a 7-1/2" long, 5-1/2" around pink, veiny, and circumcised cock - complete with a slight upward curve ending with a large, pronounced mushroom tip that gives most doorknobs a run for their money. Nestled beneath a taught sack contains two proportionately large and seemingly never empty balls capable of spraying rope after rope of hot thick white cum with considerable force and distance. A thick covering of nearly black untrimmed pubes cover my groin and scrotum.
Anyway, back to the story.
"Bullshit, you would've told me by now," Andrea retorted confidently, referring to both Katie and mine's relationship approaching 4 years at the time in conjunction with their openness with each other regarding partners, sexual details included.
"Andrea, you're always the one talking, maybe if you let me get a word in once in a while," Katie replied, hinting at her frustration. She had confided in me a few times that she often felt conflicted in these sorts of discussions with her girlfriends. She was comfortably in a relationship which was headed toward marriage at a time when most of her girlfriends were struggling in their romantic lives, with the pandemic complicating things even further. Additionally, a search of my Linkedin headline "Senior Software Engineer" and a quick visit to Glassdoor would reveal I more than likely made over double what her and her coworkers made as entry level healthcare employees. She says she doesn't want to seem like she's bragging. I'm sure the Chanel and LV purses I've bought for her didn't help.
"Ok, well talk now. Care to elaborate?" Andrea pushed.
"It's.... No. Forget it. Nevermind," my wife replied, returning to her more usual subdued conversational style. But Andrea, knowing Andrea, is nothing short of persistent when she wants to be.
"No. Katie, no. Tell me what you're talking about," Andrea insisted.
"I told you. His penis.... I'm just saying you'd think it's impressive," Katie answered, sounding more confident. "More than this Captain America dick pic, anyway."
"Yeah right Katie."
"It just is. Trust me."
It was like I wasn't even in the room.
What's so impressive about it?" Andrea pushed.
"It's...." Katie hesitated.
"Is it big?" Andrea wasn't dropping the topic.
"Yes," Katie replied.
"Pshhhh, you've slept with like two other people, how would you know?" Andrea started to dismiss Katie's opinion.
"So what Andrea? I've seen more than three dicks in my life. I know what big is," Katie shut her down, sounding a bit annoyed at the accusation.
"Oh yeah? How big?"
I had my suspicions based on some previous comments Andrea made that she was a bit of a size queen. She was confirming that suspicion now.
"Big big." Katie wasn't completely avoiding the topic, but wasn't giving away too much either.
"Come on Katie," Andrea almost pleaded.
"Big like, biggest I've ever seen. Big."
"How big is it?"
"Andrea, trust me."
"Brian, how big is your penis?"
I couldn't believe my ears.
"Andrea, come on. Just trust Katie." I wasn't sure how far my girlfriend wanted to take this.
"Oh fuck you guys, I'm all frustrated over here alone and you drop that bomb on me? Give me more than that."
"Why do you want to know so bad?" Katie chimed in.
"Because, it's been like over 3 months. I'm losing my damn mind."
"Ok, so watch some porn or something," Katie offered.
"It's not the same. I'm not as visual as I am mental. And the thought that there's just regular guys out there packing serious heat does a lot more for me than watching some bimbo with fake tits getting pounded," she reasoned.
"Regular? I think I'm quite the catch," I say, smirking confidently into the camera.
"No offense Brian, you know what I mean."
"I know, I know. None taken."
"Ok good. So tell me how big it is," Andrea kept pestering us.
"You can tell her if you want," Katie said looking at me.
"Do you want me to?" I asked her. Despite the alcohol, I was starting to get aroused by the conversation.
"I don't know, sure. I don't care."
"Ugh you guys are torturing me," Andrea pleaded.
"She's not gonna drop it," Katie told me what I already knew.
"Well you started this, I think you should finish it," I suggested to her, nodding discreetly towards the coffee table where the remote for our Samsung flatscreen was sitting. I've sent photos before comparing my hard cock next to it before so I knew it was a fair comparison. Katie got the hint, picked it up, and waved it gently in front of the camera.
"What?! No," Andrea replied, sounding shocked.
"Yup," Katie insisted, starting to form a proud little grin. She held the remote against her forearm to emphasize its size.
"No way. Seriously?"
"Seriously. Not quite as wide, but it's at least as long. Maybe a little longer," I answered honestly.
"Damn. If you're not lying, ok. Impressive," Andrea conceded.
"Why would I be lying, it's not like I'm trying to fuck you," I insisted. I truly wasn't, though I totally would if the right circumstances presented themselves and had Katie's solid permission.
"I told you, it's big. But it's not just his size, it's just....it's an attractive penis," Katie added.
"Attractive how?"
"Like, it's pretty. Not ugly or weird looking."
"Ok, so....I'm guessing he's circumcised?" Andrea asked. It was a fair assumption. Circumcision seemingly was standard practice for white males in the United States that were born in the late 80s. Most people around our age hadn't even seen one that wasn't.
