Author's note:
This could "fit" into almost any category: sci-fi themed, with heavy elements of exhibitionism, attempted humor, some non-consent, and a host of others. Maybe even novella, clocking in at 12,000 words. IF YOU LIKE REALISTIC AND INTIMATE SEX, THIS IS NOT IT. Just warning those who care, before they invest too much time in it.
It's utter nonsense and scrambles all over the place, but I had fun writing it. There's an occasional, unmentioned "narrator" of sorts, and I'm hoping the style works out. Seriously, the world ruleset in this is hilariously stupid, to the point I almost never published it. I guess I might have no shame.
Anyway, It's been sitting around/cooking for a very long time (years), as I kept going back to it, finding it amusing. I hope it pleases some of you.
IMPORTANT WARNING:
This story has elements of physical and sexual assault, but in a John Waters kind of way.
It's meant to be over-the-top, and that extends to the "violence".
*****
Amanda and the Bureau of Orgasmic Defense
"Permission to show you my tits, sir?" shouted Lieutenant Lawson.
"Granted," responded Colonel James P. Till, rather bored from behind his desk.
Colonel Till had been a military man all his life. Born into it, he attended military schools and had years of elite physical and psychological training, as well as three tours of duty. He was recently tapped to head the Bureau of Orgasmic Defense. In his time, James Till had seen it all, and it came as no surprise to anyone that he was assigned this exhaustive task. One he didn't really want.
The B.O.D. was formed to combat the newest threat to human civilization, and only the finest and fittest women would serve in the field. Amanda Lawson was one such hopeful recruit, but she was one among thousands. She was, however, grateful she'd made it this far in the screening process, now presenting herself to Colonel Till, the director of the new agency.
Lieutenant Amanda Lawson had served in the Navy for almost a decade. Unlike Colonel Till, she came from nothing, an orphan at birth. Her journey, from infant to high school graduate, involved more than a dozen moves into various foster homes. At eighteen years of age, Amanda turned to the military for stability. Along the way, she discovered it was more than that. She became driven and motivated, and hoped to achieve the highest ranks in the Navy. Admiral, no less.
Colonel James P. Till, on the other hand, was destined to become a General, if only for his family heritage. He was experienced and capable, no doubt, but he had long lost the flames of motivation and duty. Colonel Till wanted to retire and play golf for the rest of his life, but in order to honor the family name, he had to wait until he achieved the rank of General.
Amanda unsnapped the button from her blouse and opened it wide, pulling her ample breasts over her bra. "For your inspection, sir," she barked.
The Colonel peered over his glasses and took in the view for a brief moment. He sighed and glanced back down at some papers in his hand. "Lieutenant Amanda Lawson, is it? It says here you weigh 128 pounds, at five-foot-seven. We like seeing those numbers. One needs mass, strength and size to do what you'll be doing. But we expect that weight from muscles... not - well, to be blunt - your tits. You are much heavier up top than any recruit I've seen."
Amanda dressed down so others didn't know she possessed such a sexy, curvy figure. Until recently, she was modest by nature, but times were different. Sacrifices had to be made. "With all respect, sir, I'm only a D cup."
"Yeah, that's big. Physically fit women don't typically have breasts so large. Not natural ones, anyway, and yours look quite... amazing." His voice almost drifted off. "It says here you were a Seal?"
"That's correct. One of the few women to make it through the program."
"Again, I must be brash, Lieutenant, but women who go through that program get exceptionally fit. Whatever breasts they once had, were practically gone by the time they finished training. Almost no body fat."
Amanda interrupted. "Colonel, allow me to show you the rest. You think by having a chest this large, that I might be flabby or unfit for service?"
The Colonel hesitantly nodded, as he leaned back in his chair. "That's what I'm getting at," he muttered under his breath. Outside of the file he had on Amanda, he knew nothing of her. She was just another number in the machine.
The B.O.D.'s recruitment program was a selective process that filtered up. Thousands of women were tested on their physical qualifications by instructors, and their beauty was judged by separate panels of six men and women. After grueling testing and observation, if a recruit doesn't get kicked out, she eventually goes to Colonel Till for final approval. Most of the candidates don't get far in the process.
And most would agree, that the ones who do make it to Till's scrutinizing eyes, could be considered elite in both fitness and beauty. He still failed almost half of them for not being "good enough" and those he passed went onto the training program, to become official agents. In short time, they would be out in the field. That's why it was critical to get recruits who were already in peak physical health, at the top of their game.
For the past two months, Till had done nothing but screen candidates in this selective process, interviewing girl after girl. "Aren't auditions over yet?" he often asked his assistant. He was ready to move on to other things. Fortunately, the interviews were nearing the end, and Amanda was one of the last to be screened.
Never had someone with a figure like hers made it to the Colonel's desk. He was extremely skeptical Amanda would pass his assessment, as he had failed most of the C-cup candidates for being too flabby. (There weren't many of them, anyway). Till recognized that most who passed the testing requirements shared similar physical traits. Small and firm up top, but with solid frames, like athletic gymnasts. They were strong, but also pretty, which was the other requirement of the work.
As Amanda peeled off her blouse and bra, followed by her pants and boots, the colonel began to have new considerations. Her outfit hid her hourglass figure, no doubt, but it also hid her sharply defined muscles. As we already established, every woman Till interviewed was attractive, but Amanda was downright hot, with firm abs on a flat stomach, and tight, curvy hips, leading down to a small, yet muscular bum. She was completely shaven, too. The colonel realized Amanda hadn't been short-selling herself. Even her thighs and calves were composed of rock-hard muscle.
"You know, working for the Bureau, you'll be displaying that body a lot, in possibly the most embarrassing of circumstances. Can you do that?"
"Anything for my country," insisted Amanda, not allowing her nakedness to impede her poise, or her mission. "Let me do this, sir, please. I won't disappoint you."
"Okay, it's your funeral."
******
Like I said, the Bureau of Orgasmic Defense was created to combat the world's greatest threat. What hasn't been mentioned, is it came in the form of an alien parasite. Once inside a host, the parasite takes over the victim's brain, controlling the body, and it blends into society, staying in the family homes. They attend work, school and church, just like anyone else, but when opportunities arise, they attack new victims, beating them unconscious, and implanting another seed-parasite into the next host. This is where it gets weird.
Hosts are only female. The alien attacker (often referred to as the "host-parasite") strips its victim and scissors the unconscious victim, until the host-parasite achieves climax. Orgasmic juices are released into the victim and with it, a seed-parasite makes its way to the victim's brain, taking over. This is how they multiply, living among us.
A host-parasite will often attack using blunt force trauma, grabbing a lamp or some such tool in the room to render their victims unconscious. It is crude, but effective. On rare occasions, these attacks accidentally kill the victims, but if a host-parasite acts quickly, they can release their seed and infect the brain, before the body completely dies. The parasite effectively brings the body back to life, reanimating her, until the body naturally heals itself. Scientists said if it weren't such a threat to humanity, the parasite could be a key to immortality.
We think the source of the parasite came from a meteor that fell twenty miles south of Seattle. Within weeks, hundreds of women in the area were afflicted, serving as hosts to this alien creature. It was an 'Invasion of the Body Snatchers,' only more terrifying... because there's even worse news. They make men sterile.
Forever.