The awkwardness from breakfast didn't abate when Vanessa came home that night. I tried to get her to sit down with me for dinner, but she said she was tired and took her plate up to her room. I couldn't really blame her, I suppose. I had no great answer for how things were going with us. She must have been trying to avoid an awkward morning the next day because she was down earlier than usual, waking me up as she dropped her dinner plate from the night before in the sink without an apology. I knew enough to pretend I was still sleeping as she made her own breakfast, ate, and left for the day without saying anything to me.
But I was still her best friend when she came home that night. I could tell what she needed as soon as I saw the look on her face. Like a scared kid coming home to her safety and security, she walked over without a word and buried her face in my chest and just hugged me. I didn't have to ask and honestly, I didn't want to. That wouldn't help. I just held her as her hurt sobbed out of her into my heart. I never asked her about work specifically for this reason; this had to be her escape from what had to be one of the hardest jobs I could imagine. Like so many nights before, I stayed with her, got her to eat something, drink something and curl up with me on the couch in my arms. She needed to be safe. I was happy to be safe.
After that, things slowly turned back to normal for us. We talked a bit more at first. It wasn't the easy, breezy conversation we were used to, but it was a start. And I was either getting better at hiding my stolen looks or Vanessa didn't seem to mind as much. Still, we never talked any more about that morning or about us. Neither of us was ready for that conversation. Not yet.
Finally, Vanessa agreed to let me cook for her again. She had been pulling in extra hours all week and hadn't been eating the best. I told her that she was going to relax this Friday and let me take care of her. She may have protested, but her smile told me she didn't mind as much as she put on. I was elbow deep in preparation as I heard Vanessa's key in the door.
"Welcome home!" I called out as I added the diced peppers to the stir fry. Vanessa didn't have a wok, so I had to run out and get one while she was at work. She wasn't the most adventurous chef, but I could at least leave something behind for her.
As Vanessa walked in and unloaded the day by the door, I waited for her to notice that I'd cleaned and set the table in addition to making the dinner I promised her. I know she told me over and over I didn't have to, but part of my brain wouldn't forget that I was a guest in her house.
When I finally looked over at Vanessa, I could see the appreciation in her eyes as she looked around. Having twice the people in her place had led to it getting messier than usual. Neither of us was relishing the idea of cleaning the place from top to bottom so she was visibly glad I took the initiative for her.
"Aw Nate, this is great! Are you sure you have to move out? A girl could get used to this sort of thing!" she said, coming around the counter to see what I was cooking as I flipped the ingredients in the wok.
"We'll be living in the same building, Nessa; I don't imagine this being the last time that I do this for you. And you'll have ample opportunity to return the favour," I replied with a smile. Setting the wok back on the stove, I turned down the heat so the sauce didn't burn. "So come on, scoot. I know you're dying to get comfortable after work."
"I suppose I could cook for you, but you'll have to settle for one of mum's recipes," she said as she kicked off her shoes. "But honestly, you're going to be over here all the time anyway. I just can't get rid of you! I even shipped you off to the States and you still came back! " She teased before slipping off and up the stairs to her room to change.
I was busy with all the side dishes and other items for dinner. I lost track of time until she came back out in a comfortable pair of black pants and a loose-fitting t-shirt. Stepping up beside me she asked "So, need a hand with any of this?"
"Just do me a favour and check the timer on the rice cooker. It should be nearly done and then we can eat," I said without looking back. I wondered if Vanessa could tell I added something while she was changing. I knew the dish was nearly ready to come off the stove because the sauce smelled the right combination of savoury, sweet and salty now.
"Five more minutes, you timed it well," She reported from the rice cooker. She was a bit at a loss for what to do as the table was set already; I had forgotten that I probably wrecked our routine when it came to dinner. Lacking any task to accomplish, Vanessa spoke to no one in particular, saying "God I'm hungry!"
"I can tell. Look, once I move into my place upstairs, you're welcome at my place whenever you want. I'll cook for you all the time since I am gonna have more free time now that I'm writing professionally."
I let the pan sit a minute to reduce the sauce a bit more. Standing up, I stretched my arms and rolled my shoulders until they popped; it wasn't easy whipping that big iron wok around for that long. Nessa and I chatted idly, filling the time as the minutes ticked down. Just as the rice cooker got to under a minute, I resumed stirring, mixing and flipping as the timer counted down.
"Okay, serve the rice as soon as it is ready; this recipe needs to be eaten as fresh as possible..." I said as I readied the ladle to serve out the mixed veggies, meats and sauce I'd been working on.
I caught her grinning when I mentioned being a professional writer. She's known longer than most, even my parents, about my desire to live off my writing. Hearing me say as much must have been as big a moment for her as it was for me. The rice cooker beeped and Vanessa popped the lid, scooping some rice into one of the bowls, and slid it across the bench to me before starting on the second one.
I carefully ladled out the contents of the wok over the steaming rice. It was so fresh, the sauce was still sizzling as it sank into the rice slowly. Right on cue, the next bowl slid in and I did the same. I laid the pan back on the stove and turned off the heat. I took the bowls over to the table and set them down on the plates I had set.
"Can you grab us some drinks?" I called back into the kitchen, just before I saw that Vanessa had pulled out the ice water already.
"Already done!" she called back as she brought the drinks in with her. She slid into her seat and took her bowl with a word of thanks before digging in. I watched as she shovelled a few forkfuls in before she sat back and sighed. "Wow, shit, it's official. I am chaining you to my kitchen so you never leave."
I smiled as I joined her at the table and mixed up my own bowl before digging in. "I don't know many recipes beyond this one. I lived above a Chinese takeaway restaurant for a year after college because I wanted to live in the city. I must have eaten there over a hundred times. Eventually, the chef just brought me back and showed me some things so I could make my fave dish on my own."
We fell into idle chit-chat over dinner as usual. From the discussion we were having, Vanessa could tell I was already working on book two in my head. It wasn't any different from how I wrote book one; I would talk it out with her over the phone and then go write some chapters before sending what I wrote to her electronically. It felt good to get back to our routine after the tense breakfast the other day.
Luckily, it seemed like Vanessa enjoyed it when our conversation turned to my book again. As dinner wrapped up, she took the bowls into the kitchen and put them into the dishwasher. Tonight, she surprised me a little when she came back and dragged me over to the lounge instead. Which wasn't easy to do since we had to step over my 'bed' to settle on the lounge. As we curled up, I noticed Vanessa giving the air bed a speculative look.
"That can't be comfortable," she said.
"It's not so bad. Plus, it's nearly over. My stuff should arrive before the weekend and then I can have the movers deliver it on Monday," I said, frowning to myself as I realized how it might sound that I'm looking forward to getting out of Vanessa's place.
In all honesty, I was starting to like my routine here. It was a bit cramped with her upstairs and me down here, but it was working. With a sigh, I dropped down onto her lounge as usual and pulled up the remote.
"What are we watching tonight?" Maybe bad movies would get my mind clear.
