All week I felt so uncomfortable when I saw Jonathan. After telling him that I was seeing someone else, I could feel him staring me down every time he walked by me. I could just hear him cursing me out in his head. I hated the feeling and I hated that I couldn't stop thinking about it. The day of the trip to New York with Darrel was no different. I was putting my textbooks in my locker before heading to Darrel's class when I saw him out of the corner of my eye, walking by slowly with his hands in his pockets. "Jonathan," I whispered, closing my eyes. Why couldn't I just leave it alone?
He sighed, stopping just past my locker. "Yeah?" he groaned, tilting his head a little to look at me.
I turned to look at him, not sure exactly what I was going to say. So I just said the first thing that came to mind. "How are you doing?"
He chuckled, shaking his head. "How am I doing?"
I closed my locker door and turned the dial on the lock. "I was just asking."
"Well, let's see. I just found out that the girl I cared about is seeing someone else. How do you think I'm doing?"
"That's not fair, Jonathan. All week you've been avoiding me."
"Isn't that what you wanted? You said you wanted your space and now I know why." He looked down the hall.
"Is that why you've been avoiding me?"
"Why not, Carmen? You've moved on, why shouldn't I?"
"How did this turn into me being in the wrong?"
He sighed and looked at me. "What do you want, Carmen? I apologized. I tried to make it up to you. I wrote you a letter wanting to try to work past this and you tell me that you're already fucking around with some other guy. So, yeah, I've been avoiding you."
"It doesn't have to be this way. I just want you to understand what I'm going through."
"It doesn't matter anymore. Besides, I'm sure your new boyfriend wouldn't want you talking to your ex, right? I know I wouldn't. Oh, wait. You did that with me too. So I guess it would make sense why you would still talk to me."
I pulled the black strap of my book bag over my shoulder, holding it tight. "Why are you being such an
asshole?
" I failed to keep the conversation between us, getting the attention of Tammy a few lockers down.
"
I'm
being an asshole? That's rich. I think I have to right to be an asshole since you decided you wanted to be a
slut!
" I could have sworn I blacked out when I slapped him across his face. The slap of my hand against his cheek triggered everyone watching to gasp at the reflex.
He slowly turned his head to look back at me. I could see his jaw working hard. I stepped back after I realized what I did. "Yeah," he growled, before brushing through the crowd.
"Wow, look who grew some balls," Tammy grinned with her smug little smile. She flipped her long blonde hair and shut her locker door.
"Great," I breathed, making my way to class. I have to sit behind her as she smirks and giggles over my mishap.
"Good afternoon, Miss Lawson," grinned Darrel, sneaking up behind me as I stood outside the classroom door. "Are you okay?" he asked as I stood still in shock over slapping Jonathan.
"I don't think so."
He pulled me aside and looked around to make sure no one was looking at us. "What happened?"
I brushed my hair behind my ear, trying to catch my breath. "I...I slapped Jonathan."
"You slapped him? Why?"
"He said something that made me upset."
I saw the expression on his face turn to defense mode. "What did he say?"
I shook my head, attempting to go to the door. "It doesn't matter."
"The hell it doesn't. You either tell me or I'll get it from him."
"He...he said I was acting like a slut."
"He fucking said
what?
" I could have sworn everyone in class was staring at us through the wall.
"Please calm down. It's not that big of a deal," I whispered.
"He can't get away with that, Carmen," he whispered, taking my hand in his.
"No, it will just make things worse. Please, let's just go to class."
He blocked my way to the door. "I won't let him talk to you like that. Just because he can't have you, doesn't mean he can throw a tantrum like a little kid."
"What are you going to do, Darrel? Are you going to tell him that it's you?" I whispered. "You're going to tell him that you're having sex with his ex-girlfriend? Are you?" He didn't answer. He couldn't answer. The look of pain was deep in his eyes. "Just let it go." He nodded his head and went inside the classroom. Luckily everyone was too involved in their gossip and classroom chatter to even notice us. I sat down in my desk behind Tammy and her clique wanting so much to hide. I just knew she was talking about me to Sasha and Paula. I opened my notebook and attempted to listen to Darrel.