Chapter 16 - Paul's Secret Desire
Amy and Paul returned to Chicago greatly refreshed from their trip to Pennsylvania. They spent nearly three weeks with Paul's family. As had been the case going out, Amy and Paul took their time coming back, spending three days traveling along a different route.
Amy thoroughly enjoyed her time at Paul's house, in spite of the family's depressing living situation. She liked his relatives. She was pleased to have put a spark of ambition back into Julie, and to have spent time with Paul's nephew. She helped Julie and Paul's mother in the kitchen and learned several recipes. She also spent several mornings outside, making some house repairs with Paul and Julie.
The times she enjoyed the most, however, were daily afternoon trips with Paul to a secluded location in the forest, about 30 minutes from town. A 15-minute hike from the road took them to a stream that had a surprise, a small deserted beach. Paul explained to Amy why this was so special; it was the one secluded place he knew of where it was possible to spread a blanket and not have to worry about ticks.
Having lived in France, Paul was more open about his body than a typical person from the US. He enjoyed being nude outdoors. This was another attitude he brought back from Europe that set him apart from the conservative mentality of his neighbors. Amy had become used to spending large amounts of her time in the nude as well, but up to now the she had only been nude outdoors in front of Suzanne's camera lens. The time spent with Paul in the forest, relaxing for hours, swimming, sunbathing, eating cheese and drinking wine, gave Amy truly special memories of her short vacation. There were lengthy love-making sessions under the sun and relaxing naps that followed. There were short walks in which Amy and Paul looked and felt like Adam and Eve must have felt, unencumbered with the stress and trappings of civilization. By the time they left for Chicago they were deeply tanned.
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Amy took only one class that summer, an easy English requirement. To Amy's huge relief Burnside went to Europe on sabbatical, so there was a break from being spotlighted in class and from her professor's red ink.
Amy's summer was full of other activity. She had promised Suzanne her time for modeling, given the backlog of projects her friend had wanted to work on. Suzanne welcomed Amy back with a notebook containing a list of planned photo-shoots. The photographer was pleased with her roommate's deep, even tan when she returned from Pennsylvania.
There were hours of studio sessions in front of Suzanne's camera. At the end of June there was a trip to Nebraska and several days of shooting in a wheat field, with the hot summer wind whipping Amy's unprotected skin. There even was a photo shoot for a chain of coffee houses, in which Amy and Wendy, dressed in company uniforms, smiled at Suzanne's camera with their hands operating the company's espresso machines. Of all the photo shoots, the ad campaign was the toughest. Suzanne had insisted that her models learn how to use the company's equipment before the shoot, which meant that Amy and Wendy actually had to train as employees and serve real customers. As usual, Suzanne's insistence on realism paid off; later that year Amy saw herself and her friend on billboards and bus posters all over Chicago, pushing coffee on the city's consumers.
Finally, there was the editing of the essays for Suzanne's upcoming book on Wendy and her gambling problems. As Amy re-wrote passages from the essays, her own bitterness about the damage to the relationship between herself and her friend came out in the revisions.
Wendy's problems were the one thing that spoiled Amy's summer. Suzanne's dark, morbid book and its depressing subject matter weighed down on Amy, as did the fact that Wendy now seemed to be able to open up more to Suzanne. Amy was frightened by Wendy's drawings and failed to see their artistic merit. Wendy's quiet, sullen behavior made her unpleasant to be around. Whenever Amy tried to talk about something pleasant, Wendy's dark eyes looked up at her with a hostile expression. Amy realized that the last thing Wendy wanted to hear was how happy she was with Paul.
Amy continued to disburse money to Wendy out of the income from Suzanne's pictures. Amy wrote all of Wendy's checks and prepaid her expenses whenever possible. She felt uncomfortable talking to Wendy about her finances. She felt like she was taking care of an irresponsible teenager.
Wendy was both grateful and resentful concerning Amy's control over her life. She resented having to ask Amy for permission to use her own money, but at the same time realized that for now she had no choice. The conflict within her came out every time she talked to Amy.
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Suzanne wanted a male model. Suzanne's experience allowed her to size up people quickly and figure out how to get their images on film. Suzanne knew that Paul at first would be nervous about having his body documented on film, and went slowly. She worked on Paul by showing him previous work done with other male models. Then she eased him into modeling for her through a joint portrait session with Amy. Amy herself was not aware of what Suzanne ultimately had in mind when she agreed to pose with Paul for a joint portrait together. Suzanne moved from facial shots to standing shots with Paul and Amy fully dressed. Suzanne moved about the studio, as she asked Amy and Paul to start shedding clothing. Before they realized it Amy and Paul were nude. Suzanne ordered Paul to sit down and Amy to sit on his lap. She retook the portraits, then had Amy and Paul pose together for a long series of joint figure shots. Finally Amy stepped to the side, and Suzanne shot a long series of figure studies of Paul by himself. She experimented with the lighting and backdrops. Before either Paul or Amy realized what had happened, Suzanne had shot several rolls of film on Paul alone.
The next step was to develop the pictures and present the better ones to Paul and Amy. Paul was deeply moved seeing himself on film like this. He was hooked.
Later that week Suzanne took Amy and Paul back to her favorite forest location. Once again her ranger fan locked the gate behind Suzanne's vehicle, this time for two days in a row. Suzanne told the ranger about the progress of her upcoming book with Wendy. She took down his address to send him an advance copy, once the new publication was ready for printing.
Amy and Paul left their clothes in the minivan and walked down the trail holding hands, with Suzanne's cameras clicking behind them. Suzanne spent the next two days taking roll after roll of film of Paul and Amy together, and of each separately. Amy was more muscular than she had been last year and her skin was darker, so Suzanne was every bit as interested in Amy as she was in Paul. Ultimately these pictures would be included with a series of landscapes into Suzanne's fourth book, which she planned to call "Eden".
The following week Paul posed by himself at the studio in the art department. Amy stayed dressed and helped Suzanne with the lighting and equipment. Paul felt a strange excitement, being naked in front of two dressed women and taking orders. Suzanne's commanding voice thrilled him. Increasingly he felt the excitement of submission.
