After a fast half hour on the vibrating bike, I pulled into Maximilian's garage, waved at Stephen tending the counter, and we hoofed it a half block to the pub. The block had seen better times. It honestly looked like it was in it's last gaps before being pulled, kicking and screaming, into abject poverty. The railroad, once a big business back in the day, and the only transportation medium when the city was founded, has since dwindled off, leaving behind a high water mark of impressive old buildings harkening back to a better time, and a core of dilapidated buildings two steps away from turning into a ghetto outright.
The front of the pub was rather ramshackle. The buildings on either side were boarded up and empty, already graffiti'ed in black spray paint, the smell of cooking food wafted from the unseen vents on the roof, the front was boarded with plywood gray with age, and dappled with advertisements, playbills, and other advertising debris.
Ivy stopped outside, looking around. "I dunno about this, it looks like a stripclub."
"Ah, the outside's always deceptive," I said, pulling her slowly inside. The door opened and jazz music and chilly air conditioning washed over us.
"What is this place?"
"It's a pub. Easy, relaxed, the best food in town, and the bartender's a genius." I said pointing as Scotty behind the bar.
"Uh-huh." Ivy said, as I pulled her to a side table. The waitress appeared and dropped two menus on the table.
"How's it going sweetness?"
"Oh, hi Brandi, it's going okay. How's the kid?"
"Doc says it's just the flu."
"Thank God."
"Who's your friend?"
"Brandi, Ivy; Ivy, Brandi." I stood and smiled ruefully. "Brandi, get me the usual. I'll be right back. Sorry, nature calls." I said, and picked my way to the bathroom, and a few minutes later slid into the seat.
"What did you order?"
"Grilled fish."
"Which kind?"
"The edible kind." She said dryly.
I smiled back at her sarcasm. "So, what up?"
"Umm?"
"Why the sudden interest to get me a date?"
"Oh. Well, I just wanted to help you out."
"How kind of you." I said, fighting to keep habitual sarcasm out of my voice.
"I really am sorry she freaked out at the last minute."
"Eh," I shrudded my shoulders easily, leaning back, "Hakuna Matata."
Ivy paused, rubbing the rim of her glass absently for a moment, looking at me. "You're pretty relaxed about the whole thing. If someone turned me down I'd collapse in a little ball."
"Been there, done that, got bored with it. Besides, I should know that if it doesn't work, then it's better for the both of you to figure it out sooner, rather than later."
"Do I detect a trace of arrogance?"
My lips quirked into a crooked smile, "Lessons painfully learned, actually. So, what about you? Still lookin' at that guy you were talking about?"
"Yes, but I don't know to confess to him."
"Confess? Bleah, that sounds like you did something wrong."
"Hey, you're a guy, you could help me!"
"Help you what? Try to get a date?"
"Tell me what guys like in women."
"Oh no. Nonononono. I am not going to talk about that to you." I said, waving my finger warningly.
"Why not?"
"First," I raised my index finger, "you're too young. Second," my thumb shot out, "I don't want to unfairly pollute an innocent mind if I can help it. Third," my middle finger joined the other two, "there is no mystical one answer to that question. And fourth, my ring finger shot out, "I am not going to discuss something that
private
with you. No, go ask your brother he's a guy too, in case you hadn't noticed."
"Aww, you're no fun. What do you have some really kinky fetish? You like tying up little girls with their own panties and whipping them with licorice or something?"
"NO!" I squeaked.
