The Seduction of Jade

Things were looking up for me in one area of life and I was more then ok with it. Professionally, I had managed to make in roads with great people and it was paying dividends of access to events and paid shoots I wouldn't have even sniffed at without their guidance and help.

Personally, well... that's a tiger of a different stripe. Kelsey Ann and I had coffee a few times. It was a bit awkward at first, but by the end of the first java date, we were at least back to being friends, that just happened to have had one hell of a sexual encounter with one another. If it ever went back down that road was unclear at best. Then there was Selena.

True to her word, she would call me up to scratch her itches when they struck. Once in a while I would call her to come over and fulfill her role as my toy. I didn't want to abuse that, because she was an awesome girl that I wasn't sure how I felt about. So, at the very least, I wasn't going to lead her on or twist things beyond repair just because she'd let me do what I wanted to her. And, she deserved that much at least.

She had been at my apartment when the bad little kitty I had been seeing but had since parted ways with showed up one night drunk and belligerent. Screaming at me that I was a fucking horrible lover and that I had abandoned her after she got pregnant. Selena's cool attitude in the middle of drama not only impressed me, but she was ready to beat down a bad kitten if it came down to it. It was that night I knew for sure she was down for the ride and I didn't want to stomp over that kind of devotion to me.

But, when you get right down to it, knowing that there were two women that would be happy to be my inspiration in life, the heart still wants what it desires and mine wouldn't let a certain dirty blonde go. I don't know what it was about her at this point that held such an attraction for me. And not being able to articulate that to her or myself for that matter was not going to end well for yours truly. That, however, is a bit later down this muddy road of love and life.

I thought things were going okay, but the morning texts had stopped. She was out of school now and working at a local hospital, St. Vincent's. She would disappear from any kind of interaction with me for days at a time and then appear out of the ethereal world for a hot minute only to fade away again. It was frustrating and maddening to me. I know I was damaged goods, but I had thought things had gone pretty good. That and the fact that her relationship with Layla's father was in a pretty brutal spot the way she told it. They were getting into physical altercations and the fighting verbally was just as bad.

As if all of that wasn't bad enough, he had been caught in a prostitute sting down in Bloomington. He managed to wiggle out of being charged even though he had been arrested and his name printed in the article about the round up in the local paper. When he saw the lady that opened the door, he changed his mind and turned around to leave. It came out later that he did that because the bait officer didn't look like the picture he had seen online. In the end, it just became fodder for his coworkers to bash him in the balls with. But he was the one she didn't seem to be able to leave, at least not for me.

It finally reached critical mass for me and I called her out of the blue. That was my first mistake. She was frantic and in a state of mind I had never witnessed her in before. The second mistake was asking her what was wrong. When she started to explain what was upside down in her life, my mind went blank. "I'm in the middle of a chemical abortion and I think I just past the fetus. The one clinic I tried to use is being shut down and this is more then I can handle," is all I can really recall Jade saying in that surreal conversation. I don't know why I was so devastated to hear her words. I felt like I had been kicked in the stomach by an ill tempered horse. And I couldn't explain why, even to myself.

Still in a haze, I hung up the phone and simply sat there for a while. A few things went through my mind that I really didn't want to contemplate. They would lead me to some rough truths or possibilities I didn't want to deal with at this exact moment. I mean, you do what you have to do in life, but I couldn't stop wondering who she had been with that wasn't me. I had a few things on the tip of my tongue but the words ultimately failed me. I had only really been heartbroken once before when I was still a teenager, but the second time as an adult was a real bitch.

Now, to my credit, I didn't just go out and fuck the sorrow out of my soul with random women, unlike in my recent past, as it had seemed like a good way to forget things for a while at the time. So what's the next best thing? I started working at an adult novelty store. That's right, I became the manager of a sex toy shop. I wanted to be so busy that I didn't have time to reflect on how stupid I had been for falling for a woman that was poison in my veins. I was still a photographer slash videographer but, it wasn't enough.

It was a slow point in the photography season and I had an open offer given to me by a client. I was the photographer at his wedding with his long time companion. Dave and Mark had had a rough time finding anyone willing to do their special day that actually knew what they were doing. It didn't bother me to cover a gay wedding. It was wonderfully coordinated and the tip was quite nice. The ball gags tied to their car with the 'Just Married' sign was a bit strange, but the looks people gave were precious. Dave had been quite impressed with my eye for detail when I handed him his wedding album. He handed me his card and said to call him if I ever wanted to take him up on a career change.

He just happened to be the district manager for the chain of the adult toy stores that I ended up working at. He let it be know that if I ever wanted a job, he was the man to see. So, one day not long after that conversation with Jade, I found his card, called him up, and said let's do this. Little did I know that was like drinking tea from the Mad Hatter and the rabbit hole I jumped into was deep and strange.

But instead of winding up in a fantasy land, I landed in the next best thing... a strip mall. Priscilla's was a chain of stores that catered to the basics of human sexuality. If you could wear it, lube with it, insert it, or watch it we had it for your consumption. And my store was in the crossroads of quite a few demographics which made the customer base extremely interesting.

I had deputy sheriffs, house wives, strippers, dojo instructors, truckers... you name it and I saw them all come through my store at one time or another. I was the Cheers of sex, kink, and toys. And let me tell you as if you couldn't already guess, selling sex related items was a good business plan to have. Not that we sold the sex itself, but the accessories to make sex better? Come into my parlour said the spider to the fly. The store I was in charge of hadn't been open very long before I took over the reigns. It was pretty fun to see where things would go.

One day I had an interesting young lady come in and wanted help to make her upcoming honeymoon to be special. With the clothing and toys I helped her to buy, she spent a couple hundred dollars without batting an eye. She came back in a week or so later with the "fiance" and I couldn't be more happy to help. There were two other young twentysomethings at the time and I was trying to keep my eye on them. The woman I was helping made another purchase and left the store. In an ironic turn of events, when the other two woman came up to pay for their items, they ask me if the guy that came in with the woman that was in front of them had a jacket when he came in. I wasn't sure and I asked them why.

"Because he left out of the store with one," was the reason given for asking. The ones I was worried about shoplifting actual told me about the real thief. We had anti theft tags on all of the expensive clothing items and a sensor at the door but nothing had gone off when he went to go sit in the car. After everyone left I rolled back the CCTV footage and Billy be damned if it hadn't caught the guy red handed walking out with a leather jacket from the store. It was an expensive coat and I got creative. His fiance had paid for her most recent purchase with a credit card. So I pulled up the information and charged the jacket to her card. Then I called her bank to let them know about the new charge and maybe the reason behind it too if the damn woman called to find about about the new purchase. Then I called the police to lodge a complaint.

After the LEO finally got there, I was told since I had charged the account, technically she paid for it. He was visibly uncomfortable taking the report next to Astroglide 2000 bottles and books about the joys of rope play, so I said thanks and let him get back to the busy streets of Indianapolis.

***

We had a back room where the overflow stock was stored until room opened up on the floor for it. I had to place some kind of order every day, so more often than not I had something coming in all the time by UPS.

The look of desperation to unload his packages and get back to the truck still makes me laugh. So, as the process then repeated itself with new stock, I heard an impassioned whisper coming to me from the floor now far from the door of the stock room. At first I brushed it off but when I heard it a second, more aggressive time, I went to investigate.

My floor clerk, Skyler, was doing an awesome job of hanging product on a stand alone four-way shelf when she became a bit frantic and started to get my attention. She started to mouth something to me and at first I couldn't grasp what she was trying to tell me. And, with a bit of surprise, it registered in my brain what she said.

Now, she was a slim, petite and attractive girl that was barely eighteen with a pixie haircut to her dark brunette hair and blue eyes that I'm sure have caused a few broken hearts after she moved on to better things in life. Her overall attractiveness is also the cause of the strange situation I found us in. Well, partially, anyway. The words she was trying her best to convey to me quietly were ones I'm likely never to forget. "Derrick, that guy is jerking off on the other side of the display...!"

I'm not against self maintenance. It's a natural thing that sometimes, in the privacy of your own space, is part of a healthy lifestyle. The caveat, however, is that you keep your pecker in your pants while you're shopping, obviously. When the thought of, what-the-fuck?, finally formed in my mind, they guy made a beeline for the door. I went to the recently vacated spot, looked down, and saw three little spots of some sort of liquid on the carpet by the rack. It only took a second for me to verify Skyler was telling the truth and I sprinted to the door.

I was too late. Whoever the hillbilly, lifted Ram, chromed out, truck driving bastard was, he sped out of the parking lot and I wasn't able to get the plate number before he disappeared into traffic. While in normal life, this might be a once in a lifetime thing, at the sex shop, this was only the beginning.

* * *

Words to live by more so then a horny sexcapade, but I truly believe everyone is a freak to one degree or another. Take for instance the guy that was my teacher for a bit at the dojo I trained at for a short period of time. I turn around one day to the door chime and there he was. "Oh, hey, Derrick. Figured I'd pay my late fees and grab a movie." I replied a little sheepishly, "Sure man, no problem." And it's one thing to realize someone you respect is a sexual, horny, freak just like you, but it's completely different when they have late video return fees.

I took it to that next level though. I started to look up rental histories. You talk about seeing things that can't be unseen. Yeah, that's the place I found myself at. It was like having dirt on the Clintons. I felt a little unclean. It still fascinates me that almost everyone I looked up had one, two, or all three of the strangest top three titles we carried at the time.

The first one was a one off title called Century Sex. Poor mamaw, there's a good reason she didn't star in the sequel I'm sure. The second one was any Gidget the Midget title. I know every guy wants to be nuts over a woman, but her movies took it literally. And last but not least, LactoMania. You guessed it. She's already preggo so all, and I mean ALL, aboard. The jacket photo of one edition being a money shot crossing streams with breast milk still haunts me a bit to this day.

Just remember every one has turn ons. And some of them are strange. Oh, and don't forget, every guy you have ever shaken hands with, has more then likely held a dick with that hand at some point or another in his life.

* * *

My sexuality has never been an issue for me. Women have been the downfall of men since ancient times, and I'm no better at warding off their charms then the next hot blooded straight male. Wars have been fought over a woman, and as I might have mentioned before, I like to... oh, fuck myself silly with a very attractive woman by my side, under me, and even on top of me for that matter. But, that doesn't mean I, by any means, have seen all of the behaviors of our humankind that can be found to be alluring. Just like with Dave's wedding I don't care if you're gay, straight, or carry the whole phone book under your arm because you'll sleep with anybody.

Don't throw what you'll suck in my face and I won't describe how I perform the abc's with my tongue in a lady's most intimate of spaces. I think that's fair, right? So, I'm running the shift by myself and an older couple in their fifties walks in. The obligatory welcome happens and I let them roam for a minute. With the best of intentions, I then proceeded to ask if I could help with anything. The woman just replies she's just looking for a new toy and doesn't need any help at the moment which I'm perfectly fine with that. The man with her, that later I found out was her brother, then turns to me in all seriousness and says, "Yeah, you."

That was the first time I can ever remember being hit on so blatantly by another man in my not so innocent life. The regret for all of the women I flirted with unwarranted was instantaneous and heartfelt. After a slight shock, my assertiveness kicked in and I quickly shut down this avenue of conversation. It still rings of pride, but I can remember thinking even if I swung that way, you aren't my type. They went on to shop the wares of the store, she bought a few things, and they left without causing any more mischief.

I didn't think much more about it until the brother came back in a few days later by himself. As soon as I recognized him, I prepared myself for anything that might come out of his mouth. It was a good thing I did because it quickly became apparent that his trip in was to see if he could raise interest in what he was willing to offer. Again, to any of the women I've ever crashed and burned with over trying to pick up, I'm truly sorry. He was relatively harmless, but the story he proceeded to tell me both mystified and somewhat horrified me at the same time. I mean, shoot your shot, but I don't know if this was an approach I would have staked a great romp with a perspective partner on for the second attempt.

He proceed to tell me that he had a great friendship with a married couple he'd known for a long time. The tale went on to explain that even though it hadn't happened in a while, that they would invite him over every so often to join in for an almost three way. I say almost three way due to the fact as it was told, he just like to lick the juices from the spouces getting it on without ever really participating in the act itself.

At that time, I had the thought of what's the point of that? But, to each their own. I must have had a look on my face when he finished spinning his yarn because he left shortly thereafter and I never saw him again. And believe it or not, this was just another day at the dapper dong of destiny shop...

***

To my credit, yes, I had one hook up while I was the manager there. Six months in and I was already over the novelty of the things I dealt with day in and day out. Very quickly, even for a sex depraved, currently reformed, addict, things stopped surprising me in the least. Some things still impressed me, like the lady that bought a three-hundred dollar ass modeled off a pornstar to give her trucker husband to stay away from lot lizards out on the road. Or, the lady that "bought" a very expensive evening dress, wore it for one night, then brought it back wanting a refund. The ovaries on that lady even in the face of ten differently placed signs saying no refunds and all sales are final to demand her money back was amazing. The perfume she wore was expensive and wafted off of the once used garment. But I guess keeping your money is still better then spending it on a one night stand regardless of how well it went.

She eventually got Dave to okay the refund, but that didn't stop a variety of other women from trying to return various toys of dubious unused or used status. Like look, even if Mother Theresa herself came in to return a Magic Rabbit vibrating toy saying it was never opened, it's not going to happen. It just wasn't. Now, we did have what we considered the professionals, shop at the store because we were close to the strip joints on the east side of Indy.

And say what you will, but waiting on them was always much easier then dealing with a sexually frustrated wife that wanted more dick then she was currently getting and we were the final stop before she looked some place other then her husband for it. A dancer that had been around long enough quickly learned what made her money or just as fast she went back to nursing school full time and slept with the professor for better grades. They knew time was money and they were the most decisive clients I had on a regular basis. I have the utmost respect for anyone that knows the what, how, and why of what they're after. I will help those who are less experienced to the best of my ability but to have a stripper tell me the shoe upc number and the size she needs from memory without missing a beat is rather refreshing.

So, yes, I did mention a hookup. And as you might have guessed already by the direction of things, it was with one of the dancers that had given off a vibe to me the first time she had come in the store for some boots for work. Alexis, still not sure if that her real or stage name, was about five six, a hundred and ten pounds soaking wet, deep blue-green eyes that held a sharpness to them, shoulder length brown hair, and had a body that was lean, trim, and I dare say most men's ideal fantasy.

Entertainers are a unique breed. With them, especially at their club, you have to take everything they do with a pinch of salt. Afterall, the more money they can separate from the poor bastards they see night in and night out, the more they make. And some girls are by far better then others in the land of make believe. Like I said, Alexis was a smart girl. She knew what she wanted and how she wanted to get it. I can imagine as stone cold gorgeous as she was, being told no wasn't something she was used to.

I'm sure some of you are pointing out at this point there's nothing wrong with her career chioce and from a morality standpoint I'm not one to be throwing stones. Hey, I'm not unaware that I would need a battalion of priests, working in shifts, to take my first confessional if I ever became Catholic. My dear father didn't want me in his own church for fear I would spontaneously combust upon entering and burn the damn thing down. I even agree that work is work and doesn't necessarily define who you are outside of it. But when she looked me dead in my eyes and asked if I wanted to go get coffee after work, I still politely declined. The look she flashed me for a split second waa as if she saw a mythical creature for the first time and that this wasn't the end, not by a long shot.