This is my sixth chapter of my first loving wife story. Chapter 5 brought in some comments, and I appreciate them. I will try in this chapter to address several of the comments and the criticisms of the last 5 chapters. It is always risky to do this because you may change your original intention a little and may go overboard in trying to justify what you have written before. However, I could not resist explaining in more detail, the motivations, and reasons for Anne's actions.
In this chapter for those of you looking for sex unfortunately, I hate to disappoint you, but there is no sex in this chapter. Instead, I focused on unraveling the motivations and reasons behind the behaviors of the characters. Hopefully, I manage to do it in a way that is still entertaining and not too pedantic.
As always, no one under the age of eighteen is depicted as having sex in this story. Furthermore, this is truly a work of fiction and there is no character based on anyone from real life.
6 The second chance: Chapter 6 Anne is reborn.
The two months I spent in and out of the rehabilitation hospital marked the beginning of a new chapter in my life. When the hospital finally released me, they had changed me into a better woman both physically and mentally. Physically, I felt like the fittest I had ever been in my life. The limp I had when I first started walking was gone. I had worked hard to not only regain my former strength and endurance, but I even surpassed it. All the exercises and weight training had made my muscles stronger and more toned than ever before. It was a combination of determination to get well and more time than I had ever had in my life to focus on my body. It is amazing what you feel when you are thin for the first time in your adult life.
I must admit I have always been a little chubby. My work as a nurse practitioner left me little time to go to the gym or work out. Often, we would eat in the hospital and the food was "junk food "which we all knew we should not eat but we were so tired and exhausted we tended to eat it anyway.
But now, without any distractions, alone and recovering from a devastating accident, I was able to slowly get back on my feet and rebuild my body. The nutritionist had me eating well and the physical therapist encouraged me to move. After being able to eat solid food, I was able to recover some weight and muscle, but I was determined to stay thin and never become chubby again. I stopped gaining weight when I reached the same weight as my cheerleader days in high school.
I was visiting many different doctors. I had a team of plastic surgeons who never seemed finished with my face. Dr. Fine was the specialist in maxillofacial plastic surgery who did my jaw and cheek bones. I also had an oculoplastic surgeon for my eyes and one who did my nose, not to mention my oral surgeon who repaired my teeth. Dr Fine was an older man, in his mid-60's but he was well groomed and looked good for his age with a short white manicured beard and a full head of grey hair. He looked very distinguished. From the first visit he seemed incredibly happy with his initial results.
"Anne, this is looking exceptionally good. How are you feeling?"
"I am feeling much better thanks to you."
"I understand that you're concerned about the scars under your chin."
He lifted my chin up to the mirror and looked at the thin lines of pink scar tissue and spoke,
"Notice how I used Z-plasty below your jaw. It is a technique that involves repositioning the scar so that it follows the natural lines and creases in the skin. This can help to camouflage the scar and make it less noticeable."
He looked at me and smiled, "I will show you how to cover them up until they fade away."
"Yes, that's good Dr. Fine because they are still noticeable," I said expectantly.
"Well, it's normal for scars to be more visible during the first few months after surgery, but over time they should fade and become less noticeable."
"That's good to hear. Is there anything I can do to speed up the healing process?"
"Yes, there are some things you can do to help reduce the appearance of scars. One of the most important things is to keep the area clean and well-moisturized. You should also avoid exposing the area to direct sunlight and use a high SPF sunscreen if you need to go outside."
"Okay, I will make sure to do that. What about makeup? Can I use it to cover up the scars?"
"Yes, you can use makeup to cover up the scars once the incisions have fully healed. Just make sure to choose a non-irritating and non-comedogenic product."
"Alright, that makes sense. How long will it take for the scars to fade completely?"
"It's hard to say exactly, but most scars will continue to improve for up to a year after surgery. However, some people may have more noticeable scars than others due to differences in skin type and healing ability."
I continued to visit the plastic surgeons after my discharge as an inpatient from the rehabilitation hospital. On my last visit to Dr. Fine before leaving the rehabilitation hospital, Dr. Fine took another close look at the scars under my chin. "Yes, these are healing quite nicely," he said.
"It's only really noticeable when you look at me with my head up. "I said studying the thin line of pink along each side of my jaw in the mirror."
"Do not worry Anne, your scar is already blending into your face nicely and in time I have no doubt that it will fade. I used the tiniest of sutures. If it does not fade completely, I can always use laser. In the meantime, you could cover it with some make up. Choose a concealer or foundation that matches your skin tone and apply it over the scar, blending it well with the surrounding skin."
He gave me the makeup kit and asked me to do it and I dabbed some of the base on the scar and applied it. "Oh, that is much better." I said admiring how well it hid the thin scar.
"The other scars are above your scalp line and your hair has grown back and is covering it up well." He said spreading my hair to look where he had made the incision."
"I cannot thank you enough doctor for what you have done for me. It is nothing short of a miracle."
Dr. Fine smiled at me and then said, "I was hoping that you let me use your face to show other patients what can be achieved. When they see your image before and after the accident, they will all be amazed."
He went over to his computer and pressed a few keys, then he showed me a picture of my old face in the operating room. I stared at the picture with a look of horror. I had not seen it before, and it was unrecognizable as human. I felt nauseous looking at my misshapen face. It had a sunken mandible and crushed nose, and my cheeks were smashed flattening the front. The surrounding area was all swollen, black, and blue. I looked like a living replica of the man on the moon.
"Oh my God I was in such a wretched state. I cannot believe you were not only able to fix me, but you gave me a look even better than before the accident! I'm so grateful for all that you did for me."
"Of course, I would like a picture of you before the accident so I can show my patients not only how much I was able to repair your face given the extent of the injury, but also how I created a new improved one given that the accident literally wiped your old face away."
"I do not mind at all Doctor Fine. But can I ask you to wait a couple of months? I have some things to do, and I need to maintain my privacy."
"Of course, take as much time as you want. You can just call me when you are ready and all you must do is sign some paperwork. However, you do not have to worry about being recognized. I will keep your name confidential, and I can block out your eyes to reduce the chances of anyone recognizing you."
It took a long time before my mental condition improved during my stay in the rehabilitation Hospital. By the time I left Columbia, I was no longer suicidal; time and the medication had alleviated much of my depression. In some ways the exercise and focusing on my body took my mind off my troubled marriage during the day.
But at night I was haunted by recurring nightmares of men all vying to have their way with me while I just did nothing, passively allowing them to do whatever they wanted to my body. I kept awakening in a cold sweat. Occasionally, I dreamed of Robert with Stacy or other women. I just watched helplessly as they made fun of me. I kept asking myself why? Why had I been so naive? Why had I not told Robert the truth from the beginning about the girl's night out? Why had I let myself be abused? Was I really a victim or really a slut?
I kept reliving in my mind the sequence of events that happened in the strip club and why I had not fully grasped what was going on. It was hard to remember my state of mind other than the tremendous guilt for what I had done. Maybe had I confessed to Robert we might have gotten past it.
I was feeling depressed, mostly upset with my own mistakes. I was being consumed by a mixture of grief, anger, and guilt that I had betrayed myself and my marriage. If I were left alone my thoughts would inevitably drift back to my sexual assault. I felt apprehensive and anxious around people especially when alone with a male stranger. I was literally going insane.
Until they unwired my jaw, I was unable to speak to the psychiatrist. However, once in the rehabilitation hospital and able to speak, the psychiatric care became more intense. Dr. Lambert was the psychiatrist that my medical doctor recommended to treat my depression when I got to the rehabilitation hospital. He was a good-looking man in his early forties. He was dark-haired with a full beard and slim build. I learned he was happily married with two daughters in high school and a wife who was a stay-at-home mom. He was very nonjudgmental in his manner and a good listener.
He made me confront the trauma of my sexual assault. When I was able to finally speak about it, I confided in him. I told him everything that had happened to break up my marriage. He was so easy to talk to. He managed to disarm me and then he slowly unraveled the feelings of helplessness and anger I had pent up inside me.
"Hi Anne, thank you for coming to see me and taking the time to talk with me. I want you to understand that I am here to help you and that whatever you tell me is strictly confidential. I understand that you have had a difficult experience before your accident that left you estranged from your husband. I am here to listen and support you. Can you tell me a little bit about what happened?"
"It is a sad story doctor. I cheated on my husband not once but twice."
