Part V
Chapter 45
'I need time to think, Harry.'
'To think. Time to think.' Her words kept echoing inside his mind as she left the boarding area and walked down the Jetway, getting on a Japan Air Lines 747 bound for Tokyo.
He still didn't know what to say, what 'to think.' He didn't even know if he'd lost her or not.
The ending she'd crafted was so ambiguous and so...unfair. To both of them. Couldn't she see that? Or...was that part of the plan?
When the big Boeing left the gate he went to the end of the concourse and watched it lumber out to the runway, then he just stood there and watched as she disappeared into the early morning sky. With his hands in his pockets and his head hanging down, there was nothing left to say, nothing to do, really, but to get on with getting on.
There was one dangling thread that needed his immediate attention, however, so he left SFO and drove over to the old house in Potrero Hills. Lloyd Callahan was in the front yard, on his knees by the flower bed picking weeds, when Harry drove up in his freshly repaired Range Rover. The old man looked up when he heard the door slam, and then he stood and walked up to the porch and sat in the shade, waiting for had to be the inevitable showdown.
"Well, well, the prodigal son returns. To what do I owe the pleasure?"
Harry sat beside his father, his steepled fingers bundled on his lap. "I just dropped Fujiko at the airport. I think she'd had enough of me after a few days."
"Different life, different expectations. Their culture is based on an enforced harmony; ours on pure, unmitigated chaos. What did you expect?"
"She was always telling me to be patient, to be open-minded and willing to accept change."
"Some changes are simply too much to accept, Harry. How did she leave it? Did she break it off?"
"No," Harry sighed, "she wants some time to think."
"And she's left you dangling. How nice of her."
Harry shrugged, his shoulders sagging in defeat. "I don't know what to do."
"Stand up and dust off your britches, Harry!" Lloyd yelled. "Stop feeling sorry for yourself. You've lived the life you wanted, the life you chose, and if she can't or won't accept who you really are, then fuck it and get on with your life!"
Harry nodded. "So, how do you like retirement?"
"I fucking hate it. The company called me a few days ago, told me they'd take me back on a part-time basis if I'd just take one or two trips a year."
"You gonna do it?"
"Hell, yes, I'm gonna do it."
"What about the model trains?"
"Oh, I'll have plenty of time for all that. What about you? You're officially retired now?"
"Yeah, but one of the assistant chiefs called Frank a couple of days ago. The department wants us to stay active through the reserves. Minimal pay, but we'd keep our badges, all that jazz."
"Of course you'll do it, right?"
"With Fujiko gone, I reckon so."
"Gone? That's pretty final, Harry. What if she changes her mind, comes back?"
"Well, we'll just have to see what happens, I guess. How's the house doing?"
"Oh, fine, fine. Your contractor took care of everything, though I found some paint splatters on the dining room windows. I was thinking about gutting the kitchen next. New cabinets, appliances, all that crap. Keep it up so after I'm gone you won't have any problem unloading it."
"I doubt I could sell it, Dad."
"Well, whatever you do, don't rent it out. Renters will just trash it up, ruin it."
"Okay."
"How's Frank?"
"Starting his second round of chemo today. I'm picking him up at noon, running him back out to the ranch."
"Your new place finished yet?"
"Yup. Moved in while Fujiko was here."
"I'd like to see it someday. So, how do you like that Rover?"
"It's a tank."
"Great gas mileage, I bet?"
Harry snickered. "Nine in the city, twelve on the highway."
"Ouch. I'm gonna need to get something pretty soon, myself."
"What? After twenty years, you're going to ditch the Ford? That's a travesty, Dad. A few more years and she'll be an antique!"
"Oh, I'll keep her, but I want a pickup now. Something big."
"Another Ford?"
"Nothing but, far as I'm concerned."
An uncomfortable silence followed, then Lloyd stood. "Well, you better go get Frank. Good to see you," he said, holding out his right hand.
Harry took it, though in a way it hurt to do so. "Yeah Pops. You take care."
He drove to the hospital in silence, and Frank was waiting curbside, looking a little irritated.
"I've been out here a half hour, Harry."
"It's not even noon yet, Frank."
"Can we go down to the department, look over those reserve contracts?"
"You feel up to that?"
"No, not really, but if I'm gonna be puking my guts out for the next couple of days I'd like to have something funny to read between heaves."
"Funny, huh?"
"Yeah, same job - for a tenth the pay. Funny, Harry. As hell."
"Yeah. Well, I meet with a bunch of lawyers tomorrow morning about the helicopter thing."
"Really? Can I come along?"
"If you promise not to barf all over the place, sure."
"Cool. I hate kicking around that house all day by myself."