Author's note: Hey friends. First off, thank you so much for the support thus far. The comments from those of you who are enjoying this journey have been thrilling.
The book still isn't done. I have a rough structure for how the last 30-50% of this book is going to wrap, but I'm still jostling ideas around in terms of what directions I want certain characters and plots to take.
But full disclosure: I started writing this book about a year ago, and since then my wife and I have had a baby. She's 9 months old now, wonderful in every way, and predictably quite a drain on our time. My wife is my first-line editor (I originally started writing this for her to serve our mutual kinks and storytelling interests) so my pace of publishing has been governed by my bandwidth for writing and her bandwidth for reading my chapters, masturbating to them occasionally, checking them for grammar mistakes, contrivances, and downright biological inaccuracies. God bless her.
So: What you are about to read is part TWO of chapter 19, because in my eagerness to publish more content for you guys, I published Chapter 19 in an unfinished state.
Thanks for being patient during the lapses in publishing. Chapter 20 is coming hot on the heels of this installment. I will finish this. I love these characters and I love this book, and I will see it through with all of the focus and passion it deserves.
Note on the last installment: I referenced Tad having a Jamaican accent, even though I clarified far earlier in the series that he is Haitian. I was more than a little embarrassed when I noticed that mistake. Sorry.
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"Good flight?" Crew Cut asked her as she joined their group, trouncing down the steep hill toward the smoking mess hall.
"Uh, yeah..." Ellie trailed, still dazed by the unexpected coitus she'd barged in on. Then her surroundings came into clearer focus and she stopped in her tracks. "Wait."
A middle-aged man behind her nearly collided with her and he swore, startled. Ellie didn't apologize as he routed around her.
"This is..." But while she struggled to produce words, her head shook back and forth involuntarily. "This is nuts, I don't know what I'm doing here. I need to go to the clinic and talk to Hannah. Can you help me get back to the clinic?"
Crew Cut looked slightly alarmed. "Uhh... Well... Okay, first..." And she seized Ellie's arm. Ellie nearly pulled away before she realized Crew Cut was just pulling her to the side of the pathway, out of the thickest of the moving crowd. Then she sat Ellie down on a rock, who took the proffered seat without protest -- her legs had begun to destabilize.
"Yes," Crew Cut answered, once Ellie was safely planted, "we can go up the hill and see Hannah, but..."
Ellie shot Crew Cut a glare, daring her to continue with an unwelcome counterargument.
"BUT," Crew Cut insisted, "I think you owe it to yourself to give this a few hours. That's it. A few hours. Think about it:" Ellie chewed on her tongue, wringed her hands, and stared at the ground being currently trampled by hundreds of feet while she listened. "You already gave up your life. You gave up your job. You gave up your ... wherever you lived, I don't know."
"This supposed to be helping?" Ellie snapped.
Crew Cut threw up her hands. "Nobody's gonna stop you if you want to leave, and they'll give you plenty of cash to help you out, but all I'm saying is that that's a whole lot of stuff to rebuild after coming here for twenty minutes and then bailing."
And this, Ellie acknowledged, she hadn't considered. The damage was done. Everyone she knew, including her family, had been told she was gone. How insane would it look if she popped back into existence in less than 24 hours with the task of explaining away the whole "Department of Defense" thing? Her job was gone, too. She'd already thoroughly fucked her relationship with Kathleen to come here. That which she had to lose was lost.
In the summer after sixth grade, Ellie's parents sent her to camp. She had asked to go -- begged to go -- and her parents, with their tight budget, acquiesced.
They drove an elated Ellie two hours north of Phoenix to a youth campground with no air conditioning, bathrooms that had no mirrors, showers that had no curtains, and food that wasn't any better than her school lunches. She didn't know a single one of the hundred other kids attending. Her cabin was supervised by a woman she'd never met. There were so many rules that she didn't understand.
On the very first evening, a sobbing Ellie begged to call her parents on the cafeteria phone so that she could ask to be picked up. She remembered realizing that this was what homesickness felt like. She had stayed nights at friends' houses, sure, but never two hours away. And never for three weeks. The distance and time felt like an infinite chasm, and it overwhelmed her.