Chapter 4: Let's Spend the Night Together
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"Tomorrow, we're going to have to get you some new clothes and shoes, my lady. These, I'm sorry to say, are pretty well done with. That's too bad, I really liked this skirt. Maybe we can find similar ones?"
He carried me over to the elevators and carefully pushed for the 12th floor. Holding me firmly, closely, gently, easily... he waited for the doors to close.
This feeling I had for him, he couldn't hold me closely enough. He made me all warm and God, I wished it would last forever... I was falling in love with him and we just met... is this what happened to my mother? Is this why I was so sad my entire life? My thoughts of my mother's life came together and I finally understood the depression the woman had lived with since that deadly day so many years ago. Is this how Jimmy felt when Miriam died? Would he ever feel this way about me?
"It's pretty late so here's my idea. You can bathe and spend the night here with me and tomorrow morning we will get you some new clothes."
Yes! Yes! Yes!
"I hope you trust me by now. My suite upstairs has two bedrooms."
Oh. Wasn't expecting that...
He noticed a sudden look of disappointment and knew what I had been thinking. "You know, I haven't even asked you when you can leave for Los Angeles with me."
I looked at him with a smile, my lips so close to his. "Trust you? I trust you with my life forever. I've been ready to leave since this morning when we spoke on the phone. My house can take care of itself for a while. I just would like to say goodbye to Kevin, please."
"Don't worry, that's fine. We can take care of that easily enough."
Even in the elevator, he continued to hold me in his arms; I felt my heart beating rapidly, the heat of his body raising my own as we went up to the 12th floor. Setting me down for a moment in the hallway, he used his key card; he picked me back up and we entered the room. He pushed the door shut with his foot, carried me into the middle of the suite and carefully set me down.
Just like newlyweds! Is this what it would be like, having my lover carry me into our bedroom? How much have I lost waiting for the perfect man to come into my life? ...and, yet, here he is... oh, God, please, let it be him.
"Oh, what a beautiful room you have!" I twirled around on the plush rug, taking it in all at once then sat down on the sofa and took off my shoes. "I've never stayed in a real hotel before. We stayed at Motel 6 a few times while my father would look for old ghost towns and stuff in the mountains, but that was all.
He liked to build model trains and old buildings. He said that his own father was a Pullman porter after the War and had traveled across the country with Santa Fe."
Jimmy opened one of the doors, making sure that it was ready and motioned me in. My stocking'd feet left deep footprints in the thick, soft teal rug.
"Each bedroom has its own bathroom and there should be a robe in there also. Your dress... I don't think there's much we can do. I'm really sorry about that. Tomorrow, when we go shopping, is that all right?"
"Why, yes, that is very thoughtful of you."
I entered the bathroom and a few moments later, opened the door a crack and handed out his sports coat. The tattered skirt and blouse stained by brick and cement dust I threw into the trash. I closed the door and turned on the shower, watching as the room filled with steam.
While in the shower, though, the day's events finally came home and I realized that the dream handed to me in the morning almost disappeared forever in the afternoon. Tears flowed heavily as I slid sobbing to the floor of the tub, the warm water hitting my bowed head, my hands wrapped around my knees.
I could hear him talking in the other room. "Housekeeping? Yes, this is Jim Crowell. Please send someone up to get a sports coat cleaned. Thank you."
A short while later, there was a knock on the door and Jimmy opened the door and spoke with the woman, giving her his coat. "How long will it take, do you think?"
"We've been told to get it back as soon as possible... two hours..."
"I tell you what, it's pretty late. So, bring it back tomorrow morning, say around nine o'clock."
At the time, I didn't know it but he had taken out his Colt .45 automatic from the room's safe and kept it close to him.
I heard the start of water in the other bathroom. A short while later, I discovered that Jimmy shaved and showered, trying to remove any trace of the afternoon's fight.
The water ran for a long time in my shower. He walked over to the bathroom door and carefully knocked. "Kaylyn, is everything all right? OK, I'm sorry... that was a stupid question."
The water stopped and I opened the shower door. There was the rustle of a towel and the loud whirr of a hair dryer which seemed to answer his question for I could hear him leave the room. I finished drying my curly hair and wrapped the towel around me, carrying the bathrobe. On the bed, I found his slippers, T-shirt and other underwear he had left on the bed. Dressing with just the T-shirt, I put on the hotel robe. The robe, so soft and thick against my skin, tickled my nipples and my thighs.
"I'll be out in a minute, uh... Jimmy." I had never really called a man by his first name in such an intimate situation. Life was moving so quickly and after almost being killed, I decided to just flow along with it. The day's events had convinced me life was too short and too dangerous to hesitate anymore, waiting for the next day that may never arrive.
I opened the bedroom door opened, and dressed in my fluffy white bathrobe and his slippers I walked back into the living area.
"Uhhhh... would you like something to eat?" he asked. "I know we can't go downstairs to the Bistro, but, perhaps something here? I can call room service and get whatever you want."
Thoughts raced through my mind as I realized where I was and how I was dressed. 'If he's trying to get me in bed with him... Why do I keep thinking about sex with him? I've never done anything like in the taxi. I don't know what brought that on. His dark red hair reminds me of that one photo I saw of my father before he was killed. Is that it? Am I looking for my father? God, I hope not. I want someone for myself.
I don't really know... maybe, I don't want to know... part of me wants to finally feel like a woman, part of me wants to thank him for everything he's going to do for me... but, part of me is still saying 'no', not now, not yet, not here. I'm so confused...
God, what should I do? I'm just going to let the evening work itself out. Whatever happens with him... happens. I'll wait for him... I don't want him to think I'm a slutty tramp, especially after the taxi ride...'
