She Reminds Me

Kimberly passes out on the way to the hospital. I feel helpless as the paramedics try to clean her wound. They wrap it up in white bandages but the blood keeps soaking through. My scar burns with the memory of the pain. I grab Kimberly's hand and wipe away my tears. I know I have to be strong for her, but it will be hard not remembering the humiliation and horror of those nights.

The ambulance pulls into the hospital. I'm forced out of the car as they roll Kimberly into the hospital. They won't allow me to follow her to the ER. I have to fill out a bunch of paperwork in the waiting room.

Finally, after a few minutes I see Jack walk into the room. I stand and he grabs me in a tight embrace. I sob quietly into his shoulder. He soothes me with a few words of comfort against my ear while rubbing my back.

I manage to get out, "He has Freddy."

Jack holds me tighter. "It'll be okay, sweetheart. You'll see."

I exhale shakily. "Maybe if I had been there this wouldn't have happened. He was looking for me..."

Jack pulls me back and looks me in the eyes. "This isn't your fault. Don't think like that."

I see David in the corner, talking with a nurse. He looks at me with a sad expression on his face. After he finishes his conversation, he walks over and lays a hand on my shoulder. "Evelyn, Kimberly is awake and she's asking for you."

I am led back to the intensive care unit. She's wrapped in white sheets. Her lower lip is cut and bruised. She looks at me with fear in her eyes. "He said he would kill Freddy if I didn't let him ... I didn't want Freddy to die..."

I quickly wrap my arms around Kimberly's shoulders, careful not to jostle her too much. "I know. It's okay. I'm so sorry."

Kimberly sobs against my chest. "He wanted to know where you were. I told him you were with Jack. He didn't believe me."

I smooth the matted blonde hair down Kimberly's back with the palm of my hand. She's shaking uncontrollably. "Shh..."

Kimberly pulls back and looks me in the eyes. There's no mistaking the fear I read in them. "He wants to kill you."

Before I can respond, I hear the clearing of a throat. I turn to see a police officer. "Miss Myers, would you mind leaving while I ask Miss Lewis a few questions?"

I look down at Kimberly and she nods. I let her go and walk out to the waiting room. I see Jack and David sitting together and walk over towards them on shaky legs. I sit down next to Jack. He swings his arm around me. I lean my head on his shoulder and close my eyes.

Jack asks, "How is she doing?"

I squeeze my eyelids tight and whisper, "She'll be okay." I look at the clock. It's been three hours since I found Kimberly. I turn to look at David. "When will he be here?"

David checks his phone and sighs. "He should have been here by now. I don't know what's holding him up."

I lay my head back on Jack's shoulder and close my eyes. I'm sure he'll be here soon. I just have to be patient.

****

The beach is where I always took Gerry. We would walk the beach in the moonlight and just talk. It brought back many painful memories to come back here. Liam knew it.

I pull into the beach and park where Liam tells me. He gets out of the car and walks over to my side, with the gun pointed at me through the window. He opens the door and tells me to get out.

I look up at him. "Did you know all along that we met here?"

He smirks. "Let's walk to the pier. I'll follow."

I walk slowly, trying to bide my time and come up with a plan.

Liam presses the gun sharply into my ribs. "I haven't got all night."

I wince. "Where's Fred."

Liam sighs. "He's in my car. I would have dumped him back into the house but you two showed up."

"So, he's dead?"

Liam's boisterous laugh startles me. "Nah just knocked out cold. Do you know how easy it is to knock down an old man?"

I swallow down the fear and calmly ask, "Where is your car?"

"It's parked in the house next door to Fred's."

I open my mouth to ask another question, but Liam pushes me forward. I almost lose my balance, but I catch myself before falling into the sand.

"That's enough questions. How about answering a few of mine?"

Liam pulls me close, almost in an embrace. I can smell whiskey on his breath. He looks me in the eye and smirks. "Did you know that Gerry was pregnant with my child?"

I feel like the wind was just knocked out of me. "No."

Liam's smile slowly fades and my fear grows.

"He would have been three years old."

Despite everything that Liam's done I still feel remorseful. The guilt gnaws at my stomach. "I'm sorry."

Liam smirks. "No, you're not. But you will be."

Liam shoves me away and this time I fall hard onto the sand. I'm lying on my back and I see Liam raise his shoe. I try to scramble away but the toe of his boot hits my right temple hard. I'm disoriented at first. I can't see anything but my eyes slowly start to focus and I see Liam cock his gun and point it at my face.

"Liam, please. Don't do this."

"Gerry was going to come back to me. We were going to work things out. I always knew there was something going on between the two of you, but I thought you were a loyal friend so I ignored the signs."

"It wasn't like that."

"Cut the bullshit. You were fucking her. Admit it."

I nod, somewhat ashamed. "She was afraid of you."

Liam's eyes widen with rage but he doesn't pull the trigger. The corners of his mouth lift and he laughs deep down in his throat. "I never laid a finger on her."

"That night. The last night. She came to me with a bruise on her cheek."

Liam waves his gun dismissively. "She asked for a divorce. She was going to take my child away from me."

I lift up on my elbows. "She knew what you would do to her. That's why she came to me. For protection."

"Is that what Evelyn is doing now? Coming to you for protection?"

I swallow down the lump in my throat. "Why do you want to hurt her? She's done nothing to you."

Liam bends down at the waist to look me in the eyes. I can see his features in the moonlight. He looks vulnerable. "I didn't want to hurt her. She's the perfect substitute. But, she isn't enough. She never will be. Not unless I can have all of her. You ruined that for me."

"I didn't ruin it for you. You ruined that all by yourself. If you hadn't abused her the first time she never would have met me."

Liam smirks, the smile never reaching his eyes. "You're right. Everything was perfect... until she told me to stop calling her Gerry."

I watch Liam turn around and kick an empty beer bottle. The glass shattered against the fence post. He turns and faces me again. "I was paying that cunt to do whatever I wanted with her. All she had to do was lie on her back and take it like a good little whore. Who cares what I called her?"

I wince at the language he was using to describe Evelyn. I can't take his verbal abuse towards her. I realize how crazy it is to rile up a man with a gun, but I want to try and throw him off. "She's a human being, Liam. But, you treated her like a dog. No wonder she chose me."

Liam's face twists in a scowl. His eyes burn with hatred. "I don't think it's fair that you get to have her. She belongs to me. Evelyn is mine!"

I ignore the pounding in my head and kick my right foot up as hard as I can. The toe of my shoe connects squarely with Liam's crotch. He drops the gun and howls in pain.

I grab the gun and scramble to my feet. I look down at Liam curled into a ball, crying in pain. Pathetic. It would be so easy for me to shoot him. Kick him when he's down. But, I wouldn't be able to live with myself.

I shake my head. "Evelyn belongs to no one."

I grab my cell phone from my pocket and dial 911. I'll let the cops take care of him.

****

She's on top of me. Riding my cock fast. I can feel myself begin to lose control. The sunlight obscures her face. I reach up to grab her cheek. Pull her down for a kiss. She pulls away from my hand. I cry out in frustration, "Evelyn!"

She laughs. It isn't Evelyn's voice. I grab her thighs, sit up, and turn around, keeping inside of her. I feel a tingling at the base of my spine. I want to kiss her when I come. I lean my face down into hers. I study her lips, cheeks and nose. All the same. Except the eyes, full of fear and anxiety. That's not Evelyn.

I wake up with a shout. Drenched in sweat. It's been two months since Liam was arrested. Two months since I've seen Evelyn.

I begged her to come with me to Europe. My tour couldn't have started at a worse time. She needed to take care of Fred and I understood that. But, the distance was killing me.

The wet dreams were becoming more frequent and confusing. I need to get laid before I go insane.

I decide to call Evelyn on her cell phone. I glance at the clock. It's 2p.m. in London. I can't remember what time it is there. I hope she's awake. The phone rings twice before she picks up.

"Hello?" She sounds groggy.

"I miss you."

I can hear her soft laugh and it makes me smile. "I miss you too. When are you coming home?"

"If the flight isn't delayed, Tuesday."

She sighs. "Three more days."

I frown. "No, only two. What time is it there?"

She laughs again. "It's Saturday. 6 a.m."

I groan. "I'm sorry. I woke you up. I'll let you get back to sleep."

Her voice sounds earnest. "No! I love it when you call me. No matter how ungodly the hour is."

I smile. "I'm glad. How's Fred doing?"

"He's doing well. He says he hates to be taken care of, but I think he secretly loves it."

"All those beautiful girls fawning over him? It can't be that bad."

She laughs. "How are you doing?"

I take a deep breath. "I've been having those dreams again and I needed to talk to you."

She pauses for a few seconds. "Whose face was it this time?"

"Gerry's" I know she doesn't like it when I talk about her. "I'm sorry... I don't want to hurt you."

"You're not. I just want you to be comfortable with me. If you keep having those dreams that's going to be difficult."

"I think I'll stop having them when I'm with you."

"I hope so."

I have to say it again. I never really said it to Gerry and I regret it. "I love you, Evelyn."

She is quiet. I believe she's thinking about saying it back but thinks better of it. "I know. Come home soon."

I hear her hang up and sigh. I thought she was going to say it back. I know I have to be patient. She's been through a lot. I don't want to rush her or worse pressure her. It would kill me if she said it and didn't mean it.

It's Sunday and I have the day off. I would rather be drowning myself in work than killing free time. I decide to sit down at the piano and write about my feelings. After a few hours, I start to feel better. The music and lyrics come to me easily.

My muse is only happy when I am not it would seem.

****

I wipe the tears off my cheeks and take a deep breath. I'm confused. Why can't I say it back? I know I love him. I know it hurts him when I don't say it back. He's been so good to me. I know I shouldn't feel obligated to profess my feelings, but I feel like I owe him something.

Maybe when he gets back I'll be able to say it. It's so much more powerful when you say it in person.

I chuckle to myself. I never would have thought in a million years that I would be in a relationship with a former client. Maybe that's why I feel the need to hold back.

I look at the clock and realize I've been talking to myself for two hours. I need to talk to Jack.

He picks up immediately. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. Sorry to startle you. I just wanted to talk to someone who knows how I feel."

Jack laughs. "A pro's opinion?"

I smile. "Something like that. Have you told David you love him yet?"

Jack sighs affectionately. "Yes. He told me he loved me and it just felt right. Is this about..."

I bite my lower lip. "He said he loved me the night Liam was arrested. I was confused and scared for Fred. I couldn't say it then. He's said it about three more times since and I just can't do it."

"You do love him. He knows that. I'm sure you will find the right time and the perfect reason to tell him."

Jack sounded calm and confident. So sure of my love for him. How could I be so hesitant? "You're right. Thank you. Say hello to David for me."

"I will. Bye, Ev."

Jack hangs up and I feel better. I know I just have to trust myself and let it happen.

I get dressed and walk downstairs to the kitchen. Fred is already up, sitting down at the kitchen table and drinking a cup of coffee. I walk over behind him and wrap my arms around him. Kissing his cheek, I ask how he's doing.

He pats my arm affectionately. "I'm fine, sweetheart. Kimberly made the coffee."

I unwrap my arms from around him, and walk over to the coffeepot. Kimberly walks in wearing shorts and a tank top. I see the scar on her thigh and it makes my stomach churn.

"Good morning, Evelyn! I was going to scramble some eggs if you're interested."

I force a smile and take a sip of my black coffee. "No, just the coffee is good. Thank you, Kim."

She smiles and gets out the skillet. The phone rings and I immediately reach out to answer it. Freddy frowns at me. I've been answering the phone ever since he got hurt.

"Frederick's. How may I help you?"

The voice on the other line is a deep baritone. He chuckles deep in his throat and breathes into the phone. "How can you help me, sexy?"

I smirk and wink at Freddy who eyes me suspiciously. "Jonathan! So soon? You called only last week. Don't you want to give Natalie a break?"

As if on cue; Natalie walks into the kitchen, her raven black hair a tangled mess. Her dark blue eyes are bloodshot. She mouths to Kimberly to hand her the pot of coffee. As she pours, I talk a little louder.

"I'll let you know if she's available, Jon. Goodbye."

Natalie stops mid pour. "Was that Jonathan?"

I hang up the phone and nod, taking in her disheveled appearance. "He wants to see you again. Should I call him back?"

She resumes pouring her drink. "Sure. I'll see him tomorrow night. At the usual place."

There's no mistaking the grin as Natalie lifts her coffee cup to her lips.

I smile knowingly at Freddy. "Good. I'll call him right back."

Fred stands up and walks over to me. He grabs the phone. "No, I'll do that. I need to get back to work."

I smile and kiss Fred on the forehead. "Okay." I start to walk out of the kitchen but Fred stops me.

"Evelyn, I appreciate you helping me get back on my feet, but I'm much better now. If you wanted to take a vacation, I don't know, in Europe? I'd say you deserve it."

I laugh softly and hug Fred. "Thank you."

****

It's Monday. The final performance in Europe. I'm nervous and excited that this is finally over and I can spend some time with Evelyn.

The concert is packed. The songs fly by and I'm enjoying the crowd as I perform. Their energy lifts my spirits up.

Before I start my final song, I dedicate it to Evelyn. Even though she isn't here, I have to give her the recognition.

After I finish the song, I notice there are tears in my eyes. I blink them away and clear my throat. I thank the crowd then I loosen my tie and throw it out to them.

As I walk to my dressing room, I feel a sense of apprehension knowing Evelyn won't be there.

I open the door expecting to see her in that short silky red robe, but she isn't there.

I grab a bottle of water and down it quickly. I wipe the sweat from my brow and neck with a clean white towel then decide to leave for my hotel.

The driver is very quick and I'm there in a matter of minutes. He opens my door for me and I walk to the entrance of the hotel. The door attendant lets me in without question. I walk over to the penthouse elevator and slide my key in.

I look at my reflection in the brass walls on the way up. I look depressed. I force a smile and it comes across as fake and almost scary. I exhale and bang the back of my head against the wall. The doors slide open and I walk out, heading for the bar. I pour myself a whiskey and lay down on the couch. I glance over at my bedroom and notice the light's on. I shrug it off; thinking the maid must have left it on when cleaning. But, my curiosity is piqued when I hear a faint thumping sound.

I get up and walk slowly towards the room. "Anybody there?" No answer. "Hello?" I enter my bedroom and look around, finally my eyes land on the bed. Evelyn is spread out like a centerfold. She's wearing the red robe but its opened, fully exposing her milky white skin. My mouth waters and my feet inch closer of their own accord.

I look at her hair: which she is letting grow out in soft curls down her neck, to her heaving breasts to her quivering stomach to her mound, which she is touching with her right hand. She's playing with the folds of her sex, driving me crazy.

"I thought you didn't like to do that."

She laughs breathlessly. "I've been doing this a lot since you left. I just couldn't help myself. I wanted to show you how desperate you've made me."

I smile down at her wickedly. "I would much rather show you how desperate you've made me." I reach down and take her right hand. I bring her fingers to my lips and suck them into my mouth. I can taste how close she is. I look down at her eyes. She's breathtaking. I give her back her hand and start to undress and pull out a condom. "How did you get in?"

"Do you really care?"

"No. I don't."

She laughs and I cover her with my naked body. I pin her arms above her head and kiss her mouth hard. She whimpers into my mouth and I can feel my cock grow with every muffled moan.

"Evelyn." I breath out her name against her neck. I kiss and nip with my lips slowly down her body. I reluctantly let go of her arms and grab her hips. I tilt them up and grab the back of her thighs, leaning down to lick her opening with my coarse tongue. She squeals in surprise. Her arms are still raised above her head, hands holding onto the bedrail tightly.

"I'm so glad you're here. I missed you so much."

She smiles at me affectionately.

I hook the back of her knees onto my hips and plunge deep into her. She shuts her eyes tight and cries out, "Oh, fuck!"

I stay inside of her waiting for her to open her eyes. I gently sway her to get her attention. "Baby, look at me."

She opens her eyes slowly and they lock with mine. "I want to really see you when I make love to you. Please, let me see all of you."

She nods her head. I pull out slowly and begin a slow fuck. She whimpers softly, her lips pressed tightly together. Her hazel eyes look golden.

Her hands reach up and touch my chest. She rubs them up towards my neck and down to my waist. I moan every time her fingernails catch on my nipples.

I want to take my time but I feel the urge to come overwhelm me. My hips start to buck a little faster. Evelyn holds onto my waist tight and moans in pleasure. Her face screws up in the most erotic way before she comes. She lets out a high-pitched wail and squeezes around me with every thrust. It doesn't take long for me to follow her into ecstasy. I lean down on my elbows and cover her body with mine. The aftershocks are still pulsing through the both of us. Her eyes are filling with unshed tears.

"Did I hurt you?"

She cries out with a half sob half laugh. "No, you could never hurt me."

I smile and cup her face with my hands. "Then what's wrong?"

Her breath hitches and she wraps her arms around my back. "I love you."

Words fail me, so I lean down and kiss her. She clings to me with desperation. I try to calm her down with whispered murmurs and kisses but she's still sobbing. "Please don't cry, Evelyn. I love you so much."

"I love you too." She shocks me with a burst of laughter. "I'm so happy I can say that back!"

I look down at her face. Through her tear filled eyes I can see how happy she is. "Oh, baby. Me too."