Sasha

When I got back to our room, I discovered that Sasha had not yet returned. I took some time to organize my notes from my meetings and called my boss to relay the good news. He was very pleased at how rapidly the negotiations had progressed. "Great job, Hallie! We've never gotten this far with them before, until I assigned

you

."

I had to take advantage of the goodwill I had just secured. "Don, if you don't mind, I'm going to skip my courtesy calls tomorrow. I've got some kind of stomach bug and I don't think..."

"No problem - You've earned a day in bed after pulling this one off!" he assured me.

Good!

I was in the clear for my surprise trip with Sasha.

I had been able to reserve a room at the inn at Samayoko during a break in my meetings earlier in the week. I had seen this place once during a trip through the countryside years ago and had always thought it would make a very romantic destination should I ever return to Japan with a husband.

Funny how things turn out...

We would take the bullet train for the short trip north. I wanted to take Sasha to the walking trails on the base of the Mt. Fuji. It was such an important traditional destination for the Japanese who had so much respect for the spirituality of the mountain.

It occurred to me that tomorrow night would be our last night together on this trip. The prospect of parting again made my stomach hurt.

I made myself not think about it. I busied myself with some other work, then checked my e-mail. There were lots of notes from the office, but suprisingly, nothing from Dylan. I actually felt a little relieved.

I decided to get some dinner in one of the hotel restaurants, ate quickly and went back to the room.

Still no Sasha. Well, I might as well get comfortable.

I changed into my negligee, climbed into bed, and turned on the TV. I fell asleep immediately.

Through the depths of my slumber, I heard the door to the room open and Sasha's voice. "I was hoping you'd be here." I didn't move. I heard him go into the bathroom and I fell back asleep.

The next thing I was aware of was a hand moving over my arm. I opened my eyes slightly; it was dark. The hand moved down to my hip and continued over the soft fabric of my negligee. I woke a little more. I moved my hand to his chest.

"I knew I could get your attention," he whispered.

He kissed my forehead and moved slowly down over my nose to my mouth. He rolled on top of me. Our lips met in a smoldering kiss. We began to caress each other more frantically. He moved his mouth down my chin and neck and down the center of my chest.

"Let's get this off," he said, pulling my nightgown over my head.

He reached over and took a breast in each of his hands, running his thumbs over my nipples. My head fell back as I felt the erotic waves flow through me. He pushed me back on the bed and lay down beside me. I put my hand lower to stroke his erection. His hips started to rock. I felt his fingers on my stomach, moving down, encircling my clit. I spread my legs wide open.

"Take me now."

He positioned himself above me. I brought my knees up to my chest. I felt him slide slowly into me; I gasped from the sheer pleasure of the sensation. He lowered himself onto me, thrusting his tongue into my mouth. I wrapped my arms and legs around him. He moved slowly at first, building up a steady rhythm. I moved my hips and soon we were slamming our pelvises together in a frenzy, seeking our mutual release. A low sound came from his throat, his pace increased and he lifted up his head, moaning loudly. I put my hands on his chest; suddenly, he collapsed on me.

Much to my surprise, Sasha rolled off and buried his face in his pillow. He went to sleep!

At first, I felt angry -

what about me?

But in a moment, I chuckled. I guess even Sex Gods need to get off without worrying about whether they gave us much pleasure as they got! I also smelled a good deal of alcohol on his breath, so it shouldn't have been a great surprise after all.

Nevertheless, I was quite aroused and not satisfied. I remembered what was in my nightstand drawer - Sasha's little purchase from the love hotel! I reached over, opened the drawer and pulled out the vibrator. Sasha continued snoring. I put it under the sheet and turned on the switch. The low hum was hardly audible.

My mind drifted back to that night, to the sights and sounds and feelings I experienced in that exotic atmosphere. I placed the vibrator on my inner thigh. The feel of it sent a shiver up my spine. I slid it up to the edge of my cunt. I started to surge again. I placed it on my clit. It only took a few seconds before an orgasm began to well up inside me. I slipped the vibrator down to my cunt and used my fingers on my clit. I don't know how Sasha didn't wake up with the bed shaking so violently.

I got up early the next morning, smiling with the realization we were about to embark on a romantic adventure. I moved quietly around the room, packing my suitcase. Sasha continued to sleep and I thoroughly enjoyed the opportunity to look at him in the morning light. Even with his disheveled hair and the shadow of a beard on his face, he looked stunning!

About an hour later, I decided it was time to wake my man. I quietly straddled his hips, bending over to plant a gentle kiss on his lips. He stirred and frowned.

"Oh, Jesus, my head hurts!"

"Well, that's what you get for going out and having a good time without me!" I lightly stroked my fingers on his chest. "And -- that's what you deserve for getting me all horny and not making sure I came!"

He opened his eyes wider. "Oh, sweetheart, I'm so sorry, it's just that..."

I silenced him with a kiss. "Don't worry, I'll make sure your punishment is fitting." I lifted myself off him and let him sit up.

"You know," he said, "I had the strangest dream. I was dreaming there was a horrible earthquake..." He stopped, a confused look on his face. He had his hand under the blanket and he withdrew it, holding the vibrator. His face broke into an enormous smile. "Well, this explains a lot of things!"

I lunged across him to grab it, but he quickly pulled his hand out of reach.

"I think we experienced a

very

localized earth movement; no casualties, no damage!"

"But there may a danger of aftershocks!"

"We'll just have to ride them out! Now where's the coffee - and the aspirin?"

I stood up to fetch them for him.

As I was coming out of the bathroom, he suddenly exclaimed with a note of concern in his voice, "Hey, why is your bag packed? Where are you going?"

I decided I was going to tease him for a little while longer.

"Well, Mr. Sex God," I began with a serious tone, "I can't believe that you would fuck me and not make sure I didn't scream to the heavens every time. I'm leaving you for -- Yaguda-san! He appreciates me! He adores my huge American breasts!"

I couldn't maintain a straight face and burst out laughing.

Sasha reached over and grabbed me around my waist, pulling me close with my boobs in his face. He rubbed his nose in between them, then slipped the straps of my negligee off my shoulders.

"

I

am the one who adores your huge American breasts!"

He pushed them together with his hands and nuzzled my nipples. I grabbed a handful of his hair, yanking his face away.

"That is good, but we don't have time."

"Don't have time for what?"

"Well, I called in sick, so I'm done with my work here in Tokyo."

"But you're not going home, are you?" He sounded genuinely alarmed.

I slipped off his lap and sat down beside him.

"I have a surprise. We're going on a little trip to the countryside near Mt. Fuji. We've got a room in a romantic inn...."

He interrupted my explanation with a very passionate kiss.

Within a few hours, we were watching the city speed away outside the window of the famous bullet train. It is a wonderful way to travel; clean and comfortable and always on time. White-gloved attendants take your tickets and show you to your seats. The lounge car is spacious and elegant. I felt very pampered.

Our journey was not far, so we did not spend a long time on the train. We alighted at our stop and took our bags through the small station building. The town into which we emerged was a different world from Tokyo. After the controlled chaos of the big city, it was pleasant to be in a small town.

We found a taxi and I gave the cabby the name of the hotel. The cabby looked over his shoulder at us and said, in English, "Honeymoon!" I laughed and nodded. Sasha looked confused.

Our driver took us further and further away from residential areas. Small farms comprised the landscape; terraced rice fields decorated the hillsides.

"So where's Mt. Fuji? I thought we were going to the district." Sasha inquired.

"Under the clouds, of course."

It obviously had been raining before our arrival; low clouds hugged the hilltops. It was actually a rare day when the sacred peak could be seen clearly. I hoped we would have the opportunity during our short visit.

We arrived at a beautiful wooden building standing in a small clearing in a thickly forested area. As we got out of the taxi, a small, stooped old man hurried up to the car to collect the bags. A woman emerged from the front door, wiping her hands on an apron. She bowed to us and announced in heavily accented English, "Welcome to the inn! I am Mrs. Murada. I have been expect you"

I bowed and replied in Japanese, "Thank you for your gracious welcome, Murada-san. We are honored to visit your beautiful inn and your beautiful countryside."

Her eyes opened wide at the realization I spoke Japanese. She smiled broadly and bade us enter. We removed our shoes at the doorway and went in.

Once my eyes adjusted to the dim light, I saw a delightful, traditionally decorated country inn. Mrs. Murada led us into the living room. Sasha walked around the room admiring the pictures and ceramics decorating the shelves and walls. Mrs. Murada excused herself and returned shortly with a teapot and cups. We sat on the sofa and sipped the fragrant beverage.

She addressed Sasha. "Please forgive, my English not so good for big talking. May speak Japanese to your wife?"

Thankfully, he did not correct her, and nodded his agreement.

She turned to me. "How does a beautiful English girl like you learn to speak our difficult language so well?"

"My parents were in the Foreign Service. I learned to love traveling and learning new languages at an early age. But when one discovers a culture as old and as fascinating as yours, learning the language becomes just a tool to facilitate such study."

She took my hand in hers. "Your husband is very handsome. I think you have come to the right place to enjoy him!" I lowered my head and blushed. She stood up and said in English, "So you must rise to your room now and see it is good for you."

She beckoned us to follow her up the stairs. She led us to a room on the top floor and opened the door. Tatami mats covered the floor and a large futon with a beautiful quilt occupied most of the space. However, the great attraction to the room was a large window and a padded window seat.

"Come look," she told me.

I knelt on the pads to get a better view. From such a high perch, one could see the surrounding farms for miles, and the base of the mountain.

"That's Mt. Fuji there" she exclaimed, "but the clouds have surrounded it. Perhaps tomorrow you will have a look. Sunrise is very beautiful."

I turned and translated what she said to Sasha. He stooped down to catch a glimpse.

"Do you wish to eat anything now? We will be serving dinner at 7:30 if it pleases you."

I asked Sasha, who declined. "What we'd like to do, Murada-san," I explained to her, "is to take a walk on the mountain. I have been there before, and even in the clouds, it is a beautiful place to be."

She agreed. She brought out a map and showed me where we should go. "My gardener will drive you in the car." She also brought out some ponchos for us to bring in case of rain. "Put on a sweater; it is much colder here than in Tokyo!"

Although Sasha didn't understand the words, he must have understood the tone. He bowed low and said, "Domo arrigato, Mama-san!"

She beamed, squeezing his face lovingly between her bony hands.

We sat in the back seat of the small, old Toyota and watched the passing scenery as we drove to the mountain. Sasha held me close, resting his cheek on the top of my head.

"I love you for bringing me here," he said softly. "You do know how wonderful this trip has been, how happy I am to be here with you."

I sighed with bittersweet contentment.

The driver stopped at a trail that would take us around the foot of the peak to the western facing side. Cars filled a small parking lot. We saw people of all ages starting out from the gate that marked the trailhead. I told the driver we would return by 6:00. He said he would wait for us.

The path led through a forest of small pine trees and lush undergrowth. "I guess we're not the first visitors!" Sasha pointed to the center of the stone path worn smooth by countless pilgrims' feet over the centuries.

The trail rose gently along the base for more than a mile, and then became steeper. Stone steps and handrails were built into the black volcanic soil in places where the pitch was difficult. We had plenty of company on the trail; it was crowded with families and couples.

We reached an overlook after two kilometers. People posed for photographs along the railing or sat on wooden benches. I looked at a map display.

"Let's try to find a way that's not so crowded," Sasha suggested and I agreed. I spotted one marked "Difficult."

"That ought to give us some room."

We found the sign that marked this trail and began our ascent. There were far fewer steps on this trail and we often had to scramble on our hands and knees to get up the slippery rocks. The trees began to thin out and we could see we had climbed into the misty clouds.

After about 30 minutes, I wanted to find a place to sit. We looked around and spied a ledge that looked comfortable. Sasha put the ponchos on the damp rock and we sat back to enjoy our solitude in the mist.

"You know tonight's our last night." Sasha said softly, turning to me and taking my hands in his.

"Yes, I do," I responded. "I know I can't avoid talking about us any longer."

He looked at me expectantly.

I took a deep breath. "You know, I am still very confused and uncertain about how to resolve my dilemma. It has caused me a great deal of anguish. You brought such a new dimension to my life, yet I can't deny the cost of continuing to enjoy it." Sasha frowned slightly.

"Last night, before you came back to the hotel, I went to the Imperial Gardens and had a long talk with myself. I realized that it was a rare thing indeed for someone to marry his or her perfect mate. If we all waited for the ideal one to sweep us off our feet, very few of us would marry and the human race would have died out a long time ago. So, I guess, the compromises I made when I agreed to marry Dylan seemed acceptable - at that time. Until I ran into you, I didn't realize how painful those compromises could be. I didn't realize how much I'd given up until you showed me what was possible between two people"

My emotions welled up in my throat and I couldn't speak for a moment. Sasha stroked my hair. "Go on..."

"So I tried to analyze my dilemma logically, weighing the pros and cons of staying with my husband or starting a new life with you. I want you to think carefully before you answer a question for me. If I asked you to describe us in ten years, what do you see?"

He turned his face away and stared out into the white, foggy distance. After a moment, he looked back. "That's a harder question than I thought."

"I thought so, too. You know why? Because we've never had anything except head-spinning lust and a fantasy voyage as the basis for our relationship."

"I know what I would

want

us to be doing," he insisted. "I think that after we traveled and saw as much of the world as possible, we would have a family and probably be settled in the suburbs."

"But that's a beautiful

dream

, not something we can easily do, in reality." I interrupted. "I have a job that I love, and so do you. I already have a house in the suburbs and a husband who is ready to start a family. I know I'm being way too practical, but is it the best thing for me to give up the things I've worked so hard for, to abandon my marriage because

we

enjoy fucking so much?"

Sasha's face clouded with an angry look. I wished I were able to take back my last words. He turned away.

He still didn't look at me when he next spoke, in a dejected tone. "Although we have had some great 'fucking,' what made it so fantastic was that it was based on love - for me, at least. Sure, we started out really fast, but is it possible for you to believe that it was never

just

about physical sensation?"

I didn't know how to answer that.

"I've been hoping, praying that you felt the same way. What can I do to explain it to you?"

"But I do believe you and I do have the same feelings! But I'm not the type of person who can throw away a husband because something better has come along. I can't imagine you respecting someone like that, yet that's what you're asking me to do."

He looked at me again, his face softened a bit. "Let me ask

you

a question now. If you weren't married, would you hesitate if I asked you come live with me after what we've done together in last month?"

"Not for a minute."

"Well,

that

makes me feel better." He managed a weak smile. "Now, I have another question. Why does your happiness have to be secondary to Dylan's? Why is it so hard for you to believe that you deserve to be happy, that someone else's welfare doesn't always have to come first! It's not that you didn't make your marriage vows sincerely, but perhaps when you agreed to it, you did it under false pretenses to

yourself

."

That statement stunned me. I'd never considered that my happiness might be more important than Dylan's. I thought about it for a minute.

"Look at it this way," Sasha said. "If you decide to stay with him, all three of us will end up unhappy. If you come with me, Dylan's the only one who won't be happy. One versus three."

"But I just can't stand the thought that I was the source of the unhappiness." I looked down at my hands. "The worst part is, no matter what my decision, someone is going to be hurt. I just don't think I'm ready to do that."

We sat there silently for a few minutes. I glanced up and was surprised to see the clouds had cleared considerably. The sky had turned yellow as the sun started to descend. We watched as the sun got lower, and bigger and redder. As it reached the horizon, it was a perfect circle of red, exactly like the Japanese flag. I reached for Sasha's arm to hug. He let me take it, but didn't return my embrace.

"Come on, it's getting late. We need to get back."

As I stood to leave, Sasha jumped up beside me, spun me around and grabbed me hard by the shoulders.

"Oww! That hurts! Let me go!" I cried.

He loosened his grip slightly, but the expression on his face alarmed me. "This is not fair to anyone. You

have

to make a decision! Please!"

I pulled away, angry that he was continuing to press the issue.

"I'm trying to! I'm not there yet! Don't pressure me like this!"

I turned abruptly and started down the steep slope, tears in my eyes. A few yards away, I turned my ankle on a loose rock. I pitched forward and fell down hard into the mud along the side of the trail. I rolled a few times before I could stop myself. I felt a pain in my ankle, and my chest where I hit the ground.