Rebuilding Faith

Faith's eyes popped open when male laughter rumbled up from downstairs and woke her. Searching for Bill, she rolled over and found the bed empty. The blanket and sheet seemed to have fallen off. A chill shivered through her, as she turned on the bedside lamp.

"Bill," she hissed, thinking maybe he was in the bathroom, and then realized the laughter from sounded like his.

'Where are the sheets?' she wondered, kneeling on a bare mattress. 'How could they be stripped off without waking me up?'

A man began talking -- low and indistinguishable. He seemed to go on at length about some incoherent topic until she heard her name spoken, "Faith is..." followed by more unintelligible words.

Her heart pounding, she wondered, 'Who could Bill be talking to?' and searched on the floor and under the bed for her flannel nightshirt. Giving up, she tiptoed to the closet for a robe, only to discover it was empty. Not even hangers were on the metal rods.

Anxious about her nudity, she hurried to the dresser, yanked open the drawers and found them all empty. Panic reached an almost uncontrollable level, when she looked at the half open bedroom door. On the inside knob hung a familiar white negligee, it had been a gift from her husband for their first anniversary.

"Wear this at your own risk," he'd warned. The filmy lace was practically transparent in normal light, and had always been Lou's favorite come-and-get-me tease.

A little better than nothing, she cloaked herself in the mid-thigh gossamer and crept to the top of the stairs to listen, forgetting about the loose board on the landing. All conversation stopped when the squeaky wood tattled under her weight.

A familiar voice said, "Faith, are you awake?"

Afraid to be seen and fearful of what she might see, Faith turned to dart into the bedroom and bolt the door, only to find it already locked. Running frantically down the hall, she pushed on all four doors and every one was locked. Confusion and disbelief weakened her legs. Stumbling backward for a supporting wall, Faith bumped a family portrait, sending it crashing on the floor.

"Don't be afraid, Faith. It's just me and Bill down here." After a short silence, he continued, "Don't you want to see me again, after all these years, Sugar?"

Worried about her sanity, she thought, 'How could it be Lou? Lou's dead.'

"I've come back one more time to see you, Faith," the disembodied voice answered.

Timidly clutching the wispy garment closed, Faith stepped down the stairs just far enough to bend at the waist for a quick peek. Standing next to the couch was her husband, Lou, looking young and strong in a green polo shirt and tan pants.

"See, Sugar," his voice said, "It's me. And Bill's here too."

Bending a little farther, Bill's white socks and navy sweatpants appeared, standing in front of the chair directly across.

Lou turned in Bill's direction, and said, "She's embarrassed. Can you believe it?" Shaking his head, he added, "God I've missed her so much."

Backing away, Faith tried to yell, "I'm not decent," but no noise would come from her mouth.

"Faith, I know you're wearing my anniversary gift. I put it there on the door. Let me see you in it one more time. Please, Sugar?" Then as an afterthought, he added, "I know you've slept with Bill. I'm cool with that. Hey, I've been gone for over six years. And I know you can't live your life on a memory." There was a brief pause, and then, "Bill and I have been talking about you. And, from what he tells me, you've got him hooked pretty deep, Sugar. He won't admit it, but I know he'll worship you from now on, just like I did."

Heart pounding in her ears, she tentatively moved down the stairs, shyly hugging herself while staring at her bare feet. The silly thought, 'I wish my toenails were polished. Lou loved red toenails,' flashed through her mind.

"I loved your body any way I could get it, Sugar. You know that," Lou said in answer.

Shocked that even her thoughts were not private, she felt totally exposed and a heat began rising in her face. A furtive glance into the room, as she descended clumsily, revealed Lou's beaming face, a soundless fire, and Bill, standing with his back turned, staring into the dancing flames.

Compassion for Bill pained her, knowing how awkward he must be feeling. She wanted to apologize for adding more stress to his already confused life.

Lou followed her thoughts and looked at Holder. "From what I'm hearing, Sugar, I think you've got it bad for him too." Turning back to face her again, he added in a tone of sadness that pulled at her heart, "Bill is here for you... the way I wish I could be."

From the bottom step, Faith rushed into Lou's open arms, and felt his nearly forgotten love close around her. Nestling against his chest, memories flooded her mind. Warm and pleasant shared times. Moments that should have been repeated for a lifetime were gone in one muzzle flash. Tears dripped from her cheeks.

Lou stroked her hair, and said, "You're so amazing, Sugar. We had some great times, didn't we?"

She nodded into his chest, inhaling deeply, trying to remember what he smelled like but couldn't, which brought more tears.

Lou scooped her up and sat on the couch.

Faith, unable to relax, continued to hug her chest with eyes shut tight, and pressed a damp cheek into his shirt, legs stretched out across the cushions.

"I'm proud of our kids, Faith. I wish I could tell them. They've turned out to be good people, thanks to you." Then kissing her hair, he said, "And I'm so very proud of you."

Sobs wracked her body, as she wrapped her arms around and squeezed him tight. Gentle hands stroked her hair and he kissed her face until she was drained of emotion.

"Shhh, everything will be all right," he whispered. "Bill's gonna take good care of you."

Comforting warmth washed over her and she calmed into a serene stillness.

Loudly, Lou asked, "You're gonna take good care of our girl, right Bill?"

Another flood of tenderness enveloped her as she basked in their combined protection.

"Bill, stop bein' a statue and sit down here with us," Lou commanded. "Faith move your feet so Bill has room."

Once again, Faith tensed. Keeping her eyes shut tight, she curled her legs and felt the cushions sag under the added weight.

"Holder, rub her feet. Her body's as tight as an oak knot."

Warm hands lifted her unresisting ankles and placed them on firm thighs. Knowing fingers worked pleasantly on her soles and she floated with the pleasure.

"Holder." Lou said the name like he was trying it out. "That's a good name, Faith," his fingers lightly massaged her shoulders. "If you married him, you'd be Faith Holder. Now that's a very cool name. It sounds... spiritual."

The comment forced a smile to her lips.

"That's better, Sugar. You're beautiful when you smile. Isn't she, Holder?"

Apparently, Bill's voice was absent as well, and she had to force her eyes open to see his reaction. When their eyes met, the smoldering passion in his gaze was overwhelming. Her heart beat wildly and she pressed her eyes shut against a new rush of affection.

"You're just as beautiful as the day we met, Faith," said Lou, as she felt his hand slip into the opening of the translucent fabric covering her breasts.

When she turned her body into his chest to prevent embarrassment, he whispered, "Sugar, let me have a peek. It's been too long." And then, "Bill look away. Give us a moment."

Cracking open an eyelid, Faith saw Bill's head turned toward the stairs and she relaxed against the arm of the couch. Lou untied the bows and then parted the fabric to expose her flesh. She shyly closed her eyes tight, once again.

Loving palms cradled her breasts, while thumbs and index fingers toyed with the nipples, "She's a fantastic lover, isn't she Holder?" Lou asked, in a tone thick with wanting.

There was no verbal response, but the man under her feet shifted, and she knew Bill was looking at her. Nervously, she waited for a hint of what was next, part of her excited and part of her appalled by this taboo behavior.

After an interminable wait, Bill's gentle hands began ascending her legs as Lou's hands slipped down her stomach. The soft fabric sheath tickled, as it fell to her sides, opening her body to full view. Faith pressed her face into her husband's side, trying to hide from the thrill she felt from the caress of the two men she loved.

'Love?' she wondered at the thought, 'Do I love Bill?'

"I think you do, Faith. It may be just the beginning, but it's there. I can tell by how you act around him," Lou said, persuasively.

"Yeah, she does have nice legs, doesn't she," Lou said, apparently in response to one of Bill's thoughts and then to her, added, "I'm sorry about the scar, Sugar. But someone's gonna burn in hell a long time for that. Believe me."

Bill's hand slid over the scar... at least she thought it was Bill's. She began to lose track of which hands belonged to which man, as the pleasurable sensations grew into an indiscernible bliss. Someone's fingers firmly gripped her ankles and forced her heels flat on the cushions, pushing them toward her bottom. Unresisting, she let her knees bend up and spread open, revealing her sex. Faith pressed her face harder into Lou's shirt, as the increasing contradiction of shame and desire heated her body.

"There's my pleasant valley sunshine," Lou quipped.

Faith grinned at the remembered allusion to her moist, pink nether lips. A shudder was triggered as someone's fingers began exploring between her open legs. Progressively, charming touches were everywhere and she lost all reticence, but still kept her face buried with eyes closed. Manly fingers toyed and pleasured her in ways both familiar and imaginatively new.

"Faith?" she heard Bill say, in the distance. Then loud and urgent, "Faith... FAITH!"

Bolting upright, in the black coolness of the bedroom, she felt Bill tossing under the covers beside her, his foot kicking her.

Cradling her hot face, she discovered, 'It was all a dream,' and rocked back and forth while her confusion and frustration diminished.

Bill's nocturnal anxiety became increasingly physical, struggling harder against some nightmarish vision.

Wanting to soothe him and sate her own need for loving contact, Faith lay down and rubbed his back, whispering close to his ear, "I'm here, Sweetie."

With surprising swiftness, he turned and wrapped her in his arms, quieting down while pressing against her, seeming to want her as close as she wanted him.

The heat of dreamed passion still burning through her, Faith played with his hair, rubbed his back and pressed her pelvis to him, needing completion. Deciding the dream was a fundamental clue, and that she really did feel a growing love for this near stranger, Faith found his mouth and pressed hers to it passionately, dropping a hand to squeeze his bottom.

Bill's lips came alive when he woke to this tempting reality. His response increased with his alertness.

The dream may only have been an emotional transference from the past to the future, but Faith decided to test what her heart implied by using her body. Relaxing her muscles, she fell back onto the bed.

Without coaxing, Bill rolled on top. The power of attraction seemed to propel him, and she wondered what he had seen in his dream.

He toyed with her body, until, driven by carnal desire, she returned the pleasure.

Animalistic want and groping hands guided and prodded to a quick and needful insertion. The joining of their flesh became a mutual act of aggressive lust that ended with screams of satisfaction.

Afterwards, crying into Bill's shoulder, she heard him whisper, "Faith, I love you."