Nature or Nurture

Afterwards, they lie still, spent, holding each other close and wondering. How can such passion have taken so long to come out and finally show itself? Why haven't they felt this way before? They have done virtually everything together since the day they got thrown together, have shared every experience. And now, suddenly, something has changed.

The next day, they go about their tasks and habits with a delightful new awareness of the other. Of course, most new lovers like to spend as much time together as they can, but they already know each other so much better than most lovers do, that only the thing that is new, the passion, stands out like a beacon. They know the doctor will spot the difference in them immediately, and hope he will not disapprove.

But when the doctor comes in around midday, he is himself so full of something that he doesn't really see his protegés. He cannot wait to share it with his friends, and hands them a bundle each.

'It's evening wear. It's time you both get out of the house, get to know the world. We're going to a play tonight, in a theatre closeby, where they stage simple tales that start with love and end in buckets of blood. I've taken a private box, you need not face too many people at once.'

After trying on the new clothes they enjoy a meal together, and then talk away the rest of the afternoon until it is time to go out. Adison is looking forward to going out for the first time in months, but she is also anxious about Vincent. He has never been outside the house, and then go to a public place? Why not a park, or just a quiet block around the house?

As if the doctor can read her mind he shows her he is not concerned at all.

'I know it is frightening to see him exposed to people for the first time in what seems to be a very public place, but try not to worry too much, Adison.

I think that people in a theatre are less aware of people around them, and too busy with how they look themselves and the entertainment to pay close attention to others.

Besides, I'm certain Vincent will love the theatre, he has such a way with language and acting, he could be a professional actor himself. And we're always talking medical talk, I thought he'd appreciate the occasion. He certainly seems happy to see you in that evening dress, I know I am.'

Of course Adison has noticed Vincent looking at her with even more interest than usual, but what does the doctor mean by his last remark? Feeling a bit self-conscious, she quickly returns the compliment.

'You don't look half bad yourself, Victor, in your lovely suit. Though you are a handsome man in any outfit, this really brings out the best in you. You clearly have great taste in clothing!'

It is true. Not only has he guessed their sizes just right, Adison's dress makes her look not only beautiful, but she also feels very comfortable in it, not too exposed and not too conspicuous. And Vincent looks just stunning dressed up: his raven hair framing his pale face, his suit cut to accentuate his broad build without taking away size, the blue colour in good taste but bright enough to take away some notice from his intense yellow eyes. Adison can hardly keep her eyes off him, and she really looks forward to going out with two such handsome men.

The trip to the theatre is uneventful for Adison, but to Vincent it is a road of wonders. The streets are filled with people, animals, children. The sounds and especially the smells assault his senses. The laundry hanging over balconies, people talking, shouting, arguing. He takes it all in, Adison hopes he'll have some space left in his head for the play.

Adison mainly watches the reactions of passers-by to Vincent, and she is amazed to see that nobody seems to really notice him, he is just one of the many townspeople out on the street. This is a great relief to her, she has no idea what to do if someone would mock him of even threaten him because he looks different. But looking about her, she sees a lot of people who look 'different'. People with scars and rashes, with flamboyant or threadbare clothes, misshapen people, very tall or very short people. She has never seen them until now, which is probably exactly what the doctor meant. Relieved, she starts anticipating the theatre with more enjoyment, and watching Vincent discover the world outside, with the friends he loves and trusts on his side, dressed to within an inch of his life, suddenly becomes one of the nicest things she has ever done.

To Vincent, the evening is one big wonder. Though the play is clearly not the best ever staged, overstuffed with drama and soaked in blood, the theatre makes a lasting impression on him. The stage with its great lights and the scenes taking place on it, though not on a par with what he has read from the great poets in the doctor's library, still evoke great feelings in him.

This is what he wants, pleasing the admiring crowd, reciting the beautiful lines, expressing the drama.

On the way back he is even more quiet than usual, trying to sort out his feelings. They have been stirred a lot the last few days, and he needs some time to think things over. Adison looks lovelier than ever, in the gorgeous dress the doctor has chosen for her, with little blushes of excitement over the play on her cheeks, and in delighted conversation with the doctor on their way back.

Vincent has seen many admiring glances thrown her way, a lot of them from the doctor. Should he be jealous of the doctor, or glad Adison has chosen him? He can't decide, and the feeling that he needs to do something with his newly awakened love for the theatre keeps interfering his thoughts.

Back home they change and sit together for a while, talking about the evening and the play. Adison and Vincent are sitting close together, as ever, but their closeness does not exclude the doctor. As the excitement of the day fades a little, their elation over one another returns, accompanied by anticipation of the coming night.

The doctor, observant by nature and a trained spectator by profession, notices straight away. 'Something has happened besides going to the theatre, you two look different somehow!', he says. Immediately afterwards exclaiming, 'You're together! You're in love! Just when I was planning to spend more time together, get to know Vincent better.'

The two lovers, afraid of rejection, are silent. The doctor, suspecting that Vincent still doesn't quite trust him despite his efforts to make up for his failure just after Vincent's birth, suddenly starts to feel fear. His, 'You won't leave me, will you? We'll stay friends?' explains his seeming dismay at the new development. He is too focussed on his research to fall in love or get married, but having tasted friendship, he is no longer willing to live without it.

Adison quickly assures him that they have no intention to leave.

'Dear Victor, where would we go? Without you, I'm only a young nurse, or a minor nobleman's daughter with no polished manners, and no marriage prospects. I want to be a doctor and you are willing to help me become one. I like you, and I like working with you.'

Vincent bows his head and adds, ' And to the world, I don't even exist!'

Adison finds he looks pretty normal now, with his hair nicely combed and his manners, well, docile might be the best word to describe them. He still looks different though, even tonight in his fancy clothes. His white, nearly translucent skin and the lack of a stubble make him look soft, even weak. But his yellow eyes betray him, this is no born victim but a wild creature keeping a careful hold on himself. Letting him loose in society without thorough preparation could be very dangerous, especially for him, but also for anyone who'd think him easy prey. The thought of Vincent out on the street alone, with no skills to make a living, and no experience with people besides her and the doctor, upsets Adison immensely.

She pictures him roaming the back streets of the town, shunned by decent folk, cast out for his strange looks and abused until his control breaks, leading him into violence. Seeing her apparent distress, Vincent touches her face, bringing her out of her thoughts.

'You're doing it again, thinking too much.'

He has no idea that it is him she is thinking too much about, but the doctor has also pictured Vincent out on the streets, and both he and Adison feel a need to watch over him, as if their wakefulness will keep him safe from the world and his own temperament.

Vincent is unaware of their bleak thoughts, his mind is still occupied by an image of himself, in a beautiful costume and stage make-up, bringing the attentive audience his lines of Shakespeare.

After all the excitement of the evening, the doctor reluctantly heads for his lonely bed. The other two move as one to a room of their own, the attic left for the mice and the ghosts of the past. The doctor has no experience with what the young lovers will do in their new room, but he has an imagination, and he would give much for a chance to try some of it himself. Of course it never interested him much before Adison came into his life, and he isn't eaten up by jealousy of Vincent even now. But sometimes he feels it would be nice to share his bed with someone warm and caring.

Far from suspecting any of these thoughts, Adison is checking out their new room and bed with Vincent. They are still very excited about the evening behind them, it is clear they will not find sleep for quite awhile yet. They sit on the huge fourposter bed, amazed at how their life has changed in a day.

'The doctor was admiring you an awful lot tonight, Adison,' Vincent says, 'do you suppose he is in love with you too?'

He doesn't seem upset about this observation, so Adison tries to answer him in the same calm way, even though she hasn't seen any of those looks from the doctor herself, and the idea of the doctor admiring her does upset her. She is afraid of complications and jealousy in Vincent, she knows the doctor's possible interest in her is not serious, he will not claim any woman for himself or he would have married or taken mistresses long before today.

'I didn't see it Vincent, but if he is, would you mind?'

Surprising even himself, Vincent has to conclude that he doesn't.

'I suppose he really likes you, having the same interests as him, being able to talk to you as an equal. You also helped him save me, he was so scared that night, it must have ended in tragedy. I could have killed him, or grown to hate him.'

Stunned, Adison exclaims, 'So you remember the night of your birth?'

Taking her in his arms, he replies, ' Every single agonizing minute of it.

He rejected me in fear, and you accepted me, having seen what I am capable of.'

Adison is touched, but still.. 'You were not threatening him Vincent, you were in great pain and need. I have never feared you. I understand his reaction and have forgiven him, but the only one who suffered was you.'

Vincent's remembering the night of his birth is a shock to her. She'd hoped that horrible night might have been wiped from his memory, the pain of it never to be relived. Feeling comforted by his closeness and lack of tension, she concludes his distrust of the doctor must have come from those memories of rejection, but it seems he has now forgiven the doctor for his arrogance in creating him, then abandoning him in his moment of need.

'I have grown to like the doctor for his actions since then, and I think I could even love him, but he is not the kind of person to love unconditionally, like you and me. We are one.'

'We are one,' he confirms, ending all conversation by kissing her with all the passion of the night before. They could spend the whole night talking about his memories of the night of his birth, and he hasn't told her about his newly found ambition to be an actor yet.

But there has been enough talk tonight, his love will now take a physical form. And when they have explored each other's bodies all over again, finding known and new stimuli, and Vincent's tongue and nimble fingers have taken Adison to new heights of passion, she tempts that place again where the beast waited last night. But this night it is not at home, or fast asleep, or chained with an even stronger chain.

And they end their loving with the same intense coupling, but more tender this time instead of in a frenzy of uncontrolled passion. After that, sleep comes quickly for both. Adison relives the night of Vincent's birth many times in her dreams, but he sleeps like a baby, and vivid dreams of beautiful plays and fame stay with him, strengthening his resolve to discuss his chances to become an actor with Adison the very next day.