Alan and I were like the original Odd Couple. He was sloppy, disorganized and never seemed to plan ahead; I was a neat freak and kept my life well-organized. He was tall and skinny; I was short and stout. When we met at adjacent desks in a cubicle farm, we became fast friends, which continued even when I moved onto a better job. The fact that I was straight and he was gay never really mattered much.
In fact, that was the last thing on my mind when we became roommates. I was just getting out of a fairly long-term live-in relationship and I needed a new place on the quick. Alan lived in a big apartment on the ground floor of a century-old house. It was spacious enough, with bedrooms on opposite ends of the long central hallway. "So your sensitive ears won't be shocked when I have boys over," he said, matter-of-factly.
"Or when I have girls over," I responded.
He gave me a long, mock-comedic stare. "Yessss... I admit that's a possibility. Though you've turned into a real pussy since Denise dumped you."
I tried to look offended, but that hit close enough to the mark that I couldn't muster much outrage.
In fact, his fuck-buddies were never a problem. He was reasonably discreet about things, and except for the occasional creak transmitted through the old walls I never heard anything. His house-keeping, however, was another matter entirely. It didn't take long before he was driving me crazy with his dirty plates left unwashed on the counter (or in the living room) and I was driving him crazy with my insistence on maintaining a clean place.
The porn nights probably came about because we needed a peacemaker. One Saturday night, when I assumed Alan would be out late partying, I was settled in the living room, watching Netflix on my laptop. After my movie was over, a persistent ache sent me looking for a different sort of filmed entertainment, and I was soon lost in a porn vortex, quickly losing track of time.
Alan returned home unusually early, and with my earphones on, I didn't hear him come in. I'd been clutching at my cock through my pajama pants, but at least I was generally presentable when I heard him laughing over my shoulder.
"—t's that? Geez, she looks an awful lot like Denise," I heard Alan saying as I pulled off my headphones. My body didn't know whether to curl up or try to flee, so I ended up paralyzed in place for a couple seconds before I could flip the screen shut.
"Uh, sorry," I muttered, trying to compose myself. "I didn't hear you come in. I didn't mean to..."
Alan laughed. "Geez, bud, no big deal. I'm not your mom or anything. You know that I watch porn too."
He sat down beside me. "But not like that stuff. Let me see more!"
Our normal repartee had come back. "Really? There's terrible things in this, like vaginas."
"I do
not
get vaginas. But c'mon, let's see it."
A little amused now, I re-opened my laptop and the video started back up. A skinny woman was getting it from both ends from two guys.
"She
does
look like Denise!" Alan said in a teasing voice.
"Look, I
like
redheads, okay?"
"And I like cocks like that," Alan responded as it cut to a close-up of one of the guys pounding the woman's pussy.
The clip continued, along with our commentary back and forth. When it finished, Alan said, "let's watch another one." By that route we spent about an hour going through different clips. Because of Alan's commentary I spent way more time than I ever would thinking about the guys' cocks. And then, about 45 minutes in, Alan said, "here, my turn, let me pick one." So he navigated to a website I'd never heard of and soon we were watching a gay porno.
Weirdly, after going on Alan's dick parade, this didn't seem that much different, it was just a guy getting fucked up the ass now instead of a woman. In the middle of this parade of stuff it seemed no less weird... or arousing. Though when Alan turned to look at me, asking, "so do you like this?" I just kinda shrugged back.
Strangely, the whole thing was more a fun buddies-bonding thing instead of an awkward sexual thing, and the next Saturday night, Alan stayed in and we did the whole thing again. We made popcorn and traded riffs as we watched a couple hours of porn, probably about two-thirds straight with some of his picks mixed in.
Given that we were at each other's throats otherwise over how the place was being kept, this probably saved our friendship. And, a few weeks in, when Alan suggested that we might as well jerk off while watching the clips together, it just seemed like a natural thing to do. When we started, Alan caught me looking at how large his cock was at full erection - from my own obsessive measuring, I knew I was just shy of six inches, and he was at least an inch-and a half longer than that, and maybe that much thicker, too. "This is what keeps the boys coming back for more," he said, and we both laughed and went back to watching a gang-bang clip he'd selected.
For the next couple months, that became our regular routine. We never really explicitly talked about the fact that we were both jerking off beside each other. And then, as it slowly turned into a contest to see who could stay on the edge for the longest, we never really talked about that either. Which is good, as I would have been in for some serious razzing - Alan could almost always hold out for longer than me, and usually came after watching me blow my load.
One Saturday night, Alan did go out, and I felt a little hurt. I went to bed early, and when I heard him come in, I realized he wasn't alone. After waiting for a while for him and whoever he'd picked up to settle in, I found myself creeping down the hallway to stand outside his door. I stood there and listened, and the sounds from within connected in my mind to the videos we'd been watching. I knew Alan was a top, so I could assume it was him making the grunting, thrusting noises, and his partner whimpering as he was getting fucked. Somewhat to my surprise, I was ragingly hard, and I found myself jerking off as I listened. I stroked as quietly and slowly as possible, and when I could tell Alan was coming, I came in my hand, too. I crept back to my room and slept soundly.
The situation wasn't built to last, and as time went on Alan and I were driving each other crazy. It got to a point that we realized that if we wanted to stay friends, we couldn't be roommates. We were both doing well at our jobs, and Alan assured me he'd be fine having the place to himself again, so I ended up with my own place on the other side of town, close to my work.
For the first couple months, we still hung out together on Saturday nights, and it was fun again without the domestic squabbles. And it just seemed perfectly regular that we'd watch porn together and jerk off.
After that, a couple big projects came my way, and I switched into heavy work mode. On Saturday nights I was just wiped, and I mostly wanted to recover and sleep and not do anything else, so our hanging-out time decreased by quite a lot. We kept telling each other we'd get together soon (Alan took to sending me ironic texts quoting "Cat's in the Cradle") but we didn't see much of each other for a season.
* * * * *
As a peace offering (and because I did miss hanging out), I sent Alan a message: "Can't really do Saturday night... how about I come catch some football on Sunday?" And he agreed, so I found myself back at his place for the first time in a few months.
Just as I was letting myself in (I still had my old key), there was a strange guy on his way out. He gave me a sort of strange smile and a nod as he went past me. And when I got to the living room, Alan looked a little surprised to see me, as if he had forgotten we'd made plans together.
In an evident effort to impress me, though, the place was far cleaner than I thought it'd be (the previous couple times I'd been over it was turning into a real dump) though he was quick to disavow me of any ideas like that: "it turns out guys run screaming when you bring them back to a filthy hovel," he explained.
"Like your buddy that was just leaving?" I asked, cocking me head toward the front door.
"Ah, he was a friend that just dropped by," Alan said. He put on a football game, and we started chatting, but he seemed a little distracted. I was going to ask, but I figured he'd bring it up sooner or later.
