I've been working on a novel--of sorts--and I wanted some feedback on a particular scene I've been struggling with. Please keep in mind this is a singular scene so character background is not present. Thank you all for reading and for your feedback!
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The early morning light peaked in through the plastic shades and lit up a corner of the hotel room. The bed in the center of the room was still shaded except for a small sliver of light which landed in Claire's eyes. Squinting, she slowly opened them, lashes peeling apart from falling asleep without rinsing her face. Blinking a few times the room began to make sense to her. It was all coming back.
Last night was a whirlwind of fucking. After Vince and Patrick fucked her as a team she was given a short break before they took turns fucking her. Every one of her holes was stretched and filled, over and over, throughout the night. Looking at the clock radio, Claire realized she'd only slept a few short hours since Vince forced her to masterbate in front of them while they stood on either side of her and jerked off before coating her face and hair in cum. She didn't know it was possible for men to have that much stored away in their sacks. If it wasn't for their exhaustion, she may never have gotten any rest.
Vince was curled up and facing away from her in the bed, his side rising and falling as he breathed. Patrick however had his arm curled around her stomach with his head resting on her left arm. Reaching down she gently unwound Patrick from her body. Her efforts were slow and tedious since she didn't want to wake either of them. The muscles in her arms were sore and tender as she slid slowly from the bed. The position the men were laying forced her to crab walk down the mattress until both her feet touched the soft carpet of the hotel floor.
Standing up straight had never been more difficult in her entire life. The pain she felt between her legs and in her ass was paramount. No matter how hard they both had fucked, her body took the abuse.
Letting the hot water pour over her flesh, Claire exhaled slowly, knowing a warm shower was in order. Her skin was coated in cum and the bruises were already forming on her inner thighs. As the warm water ran over her face she used her hands to rinse the evidence of last night down the drain. The water gave their deposits a fresh slimy texture as she continued to run her hands over the areas on her body where they smeared their juices.
Knowing what she'd allowed them to do was a revelation to her self-esteem. She acted like a whore for them, giving them her body openly and wantonly. Claire had never felt more desired and doubted the feeling would leave her memory any time soon. She had zero regrets except for lying to them about her name and who she really was. These two men weren't complete strangers, but she knew the truth wasn't a part of what they had done last night. It was animalistic and savage. Claire couldn't wait to let it happen to her again. These acts were certainly giving her several ideas for her novel.
Lathering up a soft rag with a soft citrus soap she took in the aroma while running the gentle material across her skin. Eyes closed she washed her body, avoiding the tender spots and rinsing away any evidence of last night. Goose pimples began to form on her arms despite the steam building up around her. With her eyes still closed she suddenly felt someone kiss her right shoulder. The kiss was so soft and tender she could have imagined it if it weren't for the hard poke she felt on her ass cheek.
Patrick was very gentle with her and made her feel like a woman who was desirable. He was always doing sweet gestures in her presence regardless of their arrangement. He paid her to spend time with him, but each time they were together she knew he was falling more in love. It wasn't easy keeping him grounded, but she managed by keeping it professional and strictly sexual.
"How did you sleep?" He asked, his hand caressing her ass cheek.
Hearing the familiar voice Claire turned and stared into the mischievous eyes of Vince.
"You're not Patrick." She replied, forcing her body to be slightly defensive and rigid.
"Correct."
"What do you want from me?"
"It's not what I want from you, it's what I want to do to you." He replied sensually. Both of his hands reached out to lift each of her perky breasts. His thumbs ran over her nipples forcing them to stand up and harden. A gentle gasp escaped her lips as Vince brought his broad body in closer. "Why did you think it was Patrick?"
"He's always been so gentle with me." Claire replied, small bolts of pleasurable electricity traveling from her solid pink nipples to the center of her slutty core.
"It's true. I can tell he wants to only pleasure you and give you what you desire. However, I have a different theory altogether."
"Oh really? What would that be?" She asked on a sigh, his fingers never missing a beat as they pulled and twisted on her flesh.
"You're the type of woman to be romanced. Flowers, wine and the whole charade. Secretly, you desire a man to treat you like a whore. You crave pleasure and want your every hole filled. I want to be that guy and I'll let Patrick treat you like a princess, as he should, but I'm going to be the master of your body." He replied flatly.
Taking her tits, one in each hand, he turned her body away from his. Her warm skin was pressed forward against the cool shower tiles as Vince held her still with his large form.
"What makes you think I'll agree to that?" She sternly asked him as her body started to warm again, her core starting to drip from intense arousal.
"Just a hunch." He whispered, reaching between her ass cheeks and cupping her pussy. Sliding his fingers between her folds he felt her need increasing. Two fingers slipped easily into her heat while his thump popped its way into her ass, the warm water providing excellent lubrication.
Claire was soaring. Vince had barely began to touch her when her body responded urgently. She had never felt such a strong sexual pull towards any man. Her body was acting on its own, separate from her better judgement. The steam in the shower was clouding her judgment, the heat making her body sweat. Just then, she realized Vince had increased the water temperature, allowing for a steamy camouflage. He had even closed the bathroom door to prevent an interruption in his plans. Turning her head to the side she saw her skin was a dark pink from the scalding water running over her flesh, but she barely felt it since Vince was slipping a third finger into her hole and finger-fucking her like a god.
He curled his fingers up and spread them apart allowing for several pleasure spots to be caressed. Claire pressed her ass back towards him forcing his thumb to dig a bit deeper. He was holding her body as if he was carrying a bowling ball, his fingers inserting themselves rapidly into her heat.
Vince was barely managing to keep himself in check with his new whore. He kept asking himself why he felt such a strong need to pleasure and fill her with his cock and seed. Last night was the best night he had ever spent with a woman. She let him coat her body with his cum and fill every hole. Sharing her with Patrick was absolute agony because the guy only wanted to make love to her and give her pleasure, but Vince wanted to use her body. It was his ass on the line and he would certainly get his moneys worth. Allowing her to take their money in exchange for sex could get him into serious trouble with his precinct. Try as he might, he knew this wasn't the last time he was going to pay her.
Her body opened up under his touch, literally. Her pussy began to leak and pulse around his finger tips. His thrusting had become desperate, like his thoughts, but Vince barely noticed she was about to teeter over the edge. Focusing on his movements he pressed his body against hers more and drove his digits into her heat, forcing her body to quake, her mouth to moan.
Vince let Claire ride out her orgasm as he kissed her passionately. She bit his lip and felt her body shake in his arms. Their tongues crashed together, desperate to be inside one another. Pulling his fingers free from her body he brought them up to his lips and sucked on them. Claire watched him with pure lust as she reached back and began stroking his cock.
Vince let his head fall back at her touch, a groan escaping his lips. She had the hands of an angel. Soft, supple and quick. Her strokes were expertly timed and it wasn't very long before Claire had Vince moving his hips in time with her tugs.
Vince growled from her touch. "I'm going to fuck you until you overflow with my thick cum!"
Instead of responding to his comment, Claire pressed her tits and stomach against the shower wall. The tiles had grown warmer in the hot bathroom, the steam almost choking her as she prepared herself for Vince.
He gripped her ass cheek roughly, no doubt bruising them more, as he lined up his cock for her ass. In one quick motion he surged forward and buried himself to the root in her tight hole. His cock could feel the tenderness at the entrance from last nights fucking so he took his first thrusts into her very slowly.
The pain Claire felt was quickly dissipating as his cock resumed it's position in her ass. Her hole was still stretched and sore. The muscles in her legs were on fire as they adjusted to her standing position. Her legs didn't really need to be spread apart since he was up her ass, but it didn't stop him from reaching around and furiously rubbing her clit. His thrusts were slow and steady, but she wanted him to fuck her harder. "You're acting like Patrick." She heard herself say as he buried himself inside of her again.
Despite the heavy steam, the air in the room changed. The next thing she knew Vince rained down hard aggressive slaps on her ass. He pulled back and held her hips keeping himself inserted as he slowly began to bend her over. Claire had to reach out and place her palms on the tile walls to keep herself steady while he continued his blows.Yanking back on her wet hair Vince pulled her body back against his and continued to fuck her. His thrusts were hard and painful. Claire was regretting her words as his angry fucking went on for several minutes. Claire felt him desperately give her body pain to establish dominance but she only felt pleasure. His grunts and unsteady motions indicated his approaching release. She prepared her ass to get flooded with cum by letting her muscles relax and her body open up to his needs.
Vince took her submission as defiance. He felt his juices begin to travel up the shaft of his cock when he quickly pulled free of her ass and tugged her hair down, forcing her to her knees in front of him. Pulling her hair again, he turned her face towards his raging cock and rammed it between her lips. "Swallow all of it!"
Claire was scared. Her knees stung as she fell to them without warning. Her hair was pulled so tight from his grip tears were forming in her eyes. Suddenly, her mouth was filled with a slick cock pulsing Vince's load of ropey thick hot cum down her throat. He was defiling her mouth and she loved it. This feeling was absolutely unheard of for her and she wondered how she would ever be able to describe it in words.
