Leanna was indeed lying in her own bed, thinking of Trevor. He must surely have given up on finding her by now, she thought. She had remained true to her word, and she had posted a letter to him two weeks before, which had contained a petition for divorce. That had been a week before her monthly was due. Now she was a week overdue, and she knew without a doubt that she was pregnant.
Now, what was she going to do? It would be bad enough to suffer the disgrace of being divorced, but now she would be unwed and pregnant, and her baby would be born a bastard. How unfair life was! If she had known she was already carrying Trevor's child, she would never have left. For the sake of her baby, she would have stayed and fought to save her marriage, even if it ended up being a loveless marriage.
Leanna thought briefly about going back, but she rejected the idea. The divorce papers had probably already been delivered, and for all she knew, Trevor may have already signed and returned them. Surely, he was anxious to get the whole thing over with. Eliza was probably firmly entrenched in his bed by now, and they were both likely to be impatient for a divorce so that they could marry. Leanna couldn't face the humiliation of going back now. Besides, she had been gone for three weeks and had been living in another man's house. What if Trevor didn't believe the baby was his? There was no easy solution.
Her thoughts returned to Trevor. The nights were the only time she had entirely to herself, and it was then that her mind returned to her husband with unfailing regularity. She longed for him, wishing she could once again submit to his demands and offer her body for his pleasure. But of course, that was not to be.
Eventually, her thoughts turned to Neville. He had pursued her with unswerving dedication over the past several weeks, and she knew he wanted to deepen their relationship. Would she ever be able to get over the hurt of the past?
Leanna had enlisted the services of Neville's attorney. Neville was anxious to help her get a divorce as quickly and discreetly as possible. In the three weeks she had been in his employ, Neville had shown himself to be an absolute gentleman, but he never left her with any doubt that he desired her.
Leanna sometimes wondered how she would feel once she was free to marry again. Would she accept his proposal? Neville made no secret that he intended to offer for her hand once her divorce was granted. She had never lied to him, and he knew she was deeply in love with her husband. However, if he were still willing to marry her, knowing that she didn't love him, would she accept?
She had not only herself to consider, but the babe she carried as well. It would need a father, and she could think of no one better suited to take on that role than Neville. He was a doting father for his two daughters. Leanna hadn't told Neville about the baby that she carried, and she knew she would have to do so very soon. Perhaps the baby would change everything. It was a rare man who was willing to raise another man's child.
Leanna couldn't sleep, and she rose from the bed and walked to the balcony doors that were opened to let in a light breeze. It was February, and the nights were frigid, but she was in need of fresh air. Her nightgown and satin robe provided almost no warmth, and she shivered as she walked to the railing and stared up at a full moon. Leanna welcomed the freezing chill to distract her from her morose musings. She hugged her arms around herself, shivering slightly and leaned against a post as she released a deep sigh.
"You seem awfully pensive tonight," a warm, masculine voice murmured from close behind her.
Leanna jumped like a scalded cat and placed a hand on her throat as she turned to face Neville. He had obviously been unable to sleep as well, for he was dressed in a thick wool robe. The bare expanse of his chest showed, and Leanna's eyes were drawn to the rippling muscles and curly hair that was visible.
"You startled me," she whispered, her eyes finally rising to find his.
Apparently, she wasn't the only one interested in her companion's state of undress, for his eyes were closely regarding her bosom, and she looked down to see the outline of her nipples, furled into tight buds from the cold and clearly visible beneath the cloth. She released a mortified groan and turned her back to him.
"I'm sorry," he murmured, stepping close behind her and slipping his arms around her waist as he spoke over her shoulder. "I didn't mean to scare you, but when you appeared, as I had been yearning for you to do, I wasn't sure whether you were real or whether I had conjured a vision of you in my mind."
Leanna shivered, not just from the chill but from the pleasure of his words. She couldn't deny that on a purely physical level, she was attracted to him, and with the hurt she felt, she wanted someone to hold her and assure her that she was worthy of being loved. Was that so very wrong, when her husband didn't want her?
Turning back to face him, her eyes were luminous as she looked up at him, and strangely, she didn't feel ashamed or embarrassed when his eyes swept her body once more. She was, after all, flesh and blood, and Trevor had awakened cravings in her woman's body that she had never been aware of before. Those cravings were driving her to distraction, and it was only natural that she wondered whether Neville could help her appease them.
Neville stepped even closer, tightening his arms around her waist as he pulled her against the warmth of his body. Leanna braced her arms between them, keeping her breasts from making contact with his chest as she met his eyes.
"Neville, there is something you need to know." She bit her lip, worried about how he would accept her news, but determined to be honest with him. "I'm carrying a child."
Neville went completely still for a long moment, but she didn't feel him stiffen. Instead, he regarded her steadily, and when he finally spoke, his voice was low and husky.
"The thought had occurred to me that you might be. Why are you telling me this now?"
She shrugged slightly and looked down at her hands resting on his chest. "I thought you might not want me anymore, once you knew I was carrying another man's child."
He chuckled briefly before answering. "Leanna," he placed a finger under her chin and raised her face until she looked at him, "I doubt there is anything you could tell me that would make me not want you."