[December 2019]
The pharmacist avoided his face before answering. Her pause made her awareness clear. The silence between them palpable despite the surrounding ambience of shoppers and registers. Spencer could tell that the older brunette employee knew full well why he was asking about the accuracy of their pregnancy tests. Even if she hadn't been inquired about the product, her first glance into his gaze was enough. The face of a new man. Her eyes again looked moist as she looked up all the way into his and advised that they had a ninety-eight percent accuracy.
Spencer stood there in his leather jacket over sky-blue sweater with hood down on his shoulders and thanked her very much while grinning serenely. As he made for the front registers she quickly wiped her eye with a fingertip and smile. Waiting in line to pay he glanced left to the liquor store archway, recalling the back of a curious little lady.
He drove from the mall in his spotless jeep with a few groceries in the back and the little package on the passenger seat next to him. His eyes kept returning to it, and every time a wave of emotion flooded his system. Clenching the wheel to stop his hands shaking, he noticed he was passing the street Morris lived on. Spencer's face fell, but only marginally. The pent up aggression he had taken out on him. In the name of protection and vengeance, sure... but it had been more than that. An external release for an internal turmoil.
The vehicle rolled on, and soon brought him to another line in the drive-through of a coffee and donut shop. He purchased a bundle of both and tipped the cute girl with freckles generously. His mind noted the similarity to Zoey and lingered there as he pulled out back onto the busy street. Spencer remembered waking after that night of partying. All four of them in the bed had been jolted awake from a tirade of anger from the second Zoey. The two began verbally fighting over Zoey cheating on herself. The three guests escaped and found Jack in the kitchen downstairs cooking a monstrous breakfast for everyone. During eating they discussed and laughed about the night before. Spencer had asked Zoey how she became friends with Jack, whom did a strange thing and shut his eyes and turned away. Zoey said she knew him well from back in high school. Spencer frowned then, having no recollection of having ever seen her before in their school.
When leaving, Spencer walked back from the car alone to Jack and the Vivians at the front double door. He knew it wasn't his business, but couldn't stop himself from asking about the daughter he had given away. Jack's eyes had closed for a second time and he only said it had to be done, and that the goth girl was in decent hands. Spencer had felt his hand forming a fist then. The twins' eyes flared in interest. How Jack looked like he wanted the hit. Spencer seen then how impossibly tired and penitent he was in those grey eyes and gave him a quick hug instead. After a comforting word, he drove out of the long driveway, feeling in his heart he would never see his old friend again.
The jeep parked in front of the fire department and he walked inside with the treats. He was greeted with grateful calls as his friends each took a pastry and coffee. Spencer had become a volunteer firefighter to avoid stagnation, and to give back to the community. It felt right after getting so much out of the blue, driving him to help others where possible. After half an hour of their company he drove to the local bank and took a minute to contemplate before walking inside.
He waited in yet another line, listening to the hum of low voices and keyboard clacking. To his left a pen fell on the floor from the adjacent line. The man in front of the woman who dropped it scooped it up and passed it to her kindly. She thanked him. Spencer slowly turned his head at that voice. There she stood, looking slightly stressed as adults tend to, brushing a wavy blonde bang over her ear and checking her cell phone. Since he last seen her slam the door she had changed. She looked gaunt, with new crow's feet now near her eyes, and noticeably paler without makeup. No ring was on her finger. He blinked and felt like he was leaping over some chasm. That still, suspended moment precipitating a choice. His ex-wife remained oblivious as he waited for some influence to strike him, to make him lean towards a yes or a no. He remembered the petty fantasy he had in the lab. Well... it was just that. He let sleeping dogs lie, and decided the errand here could just as well be done tomorrow. As he turned away to leave, he saw her look to him from his peripherals. He heard her make some noise or soft inquisitive call, but let the heavy door close behind him as he walked out onto the slushy sidewalk.
Behind the wheel again he was idling, waiting for the construction worker to turn the sign from red to yellow. Spencer sighed, and turned off the radio, disliking the pop song repeated every hour it seemed. His mind wandered to her back in the bank. How dishevelled and lonely she seemed. He felt a concerned pity, despite what she did to him. His eyes met themself in the rear view mirror as he waited. Spencer regarded the face that drove her to take everything, except the shards of his heart she left for him to sort through. His sprawling scar like twisting roots. The left eye a misty grey from the cataract. Contemplating, he wondered whether it had been the job offered at the last minute he took, the lightning bolt that struck him, the resulting scar after surviving, her own pettiness or even his temporary dark habit of stalking that contributed most to his current life. The life more fulfilled and happy than any she could have provided.
A tiny sharp cry snapped him out of thought and he watched a mother tugging her daughter's arm to hurry as they jaywalked past his hood between traffic. A flash of resentment shot through him at this needless danger she put them both in. An indication of a poor mother. The sign turned to yellow, and the vehicles slowly moved on. He observed the two for as long as he could, then shook his head. Negligence on her part. Then with a flurry of mixed emotions, he remembered Katherine's mother. Not only her abuse towards her daughter years ago, but her recent unwelcome visit to the duplex. A dry mirthless grin lasted a few seconds as he thought.
Both Katherines and he had been home at the time. He was washing dishes after they had finished a home cooked smoked salmon pizza. He heard them both give a loud scared gasp behind him and he turned instantly with eyes alert and one dripping fist clenched. He caught the last visible second of someone passing the front window in daylight, and the girls scrambling over the back of the couch and running to him in fear. He felt them shivering against him and he stared in confusion before an annoying knock on the door. Only one person in the world would have this effect on them. Spencer had felt a broiling anger rise in him then as the knock came again louder and a shriek called her daughter's name. He raised their chins with gentle fingers and his expression calmed them. After a kiss to both their heads, they followed his instruction to go upstairs. Spencer stood still before the door, glaring at it for a few moments, listening to the mother's shuffling, pounding and yelling on the other side. The word money was hollered more than once.
"Don't you DARE ignore me you fu-" Her screams ceased as the door opened and she seen Spencer calmly standing there in a plain white long sleeved shirt with rolled up sleeves and jeans. Her eyes roved over his damaged visage in clear repulsion. She was slightly hunched, in a fake fur coat with small tears and holes, knee high boots, and too many rings. Her face was very lined for her age and seemed permanently afflicted with an expression of skittery disdain. The hair around it looked dry and wispy. "And who the hell are you?!" She demanded.
"Spencer Malone."
