In a Class of His Own

- "I want to ask your sister out." I said. "I want to go out with Sarah."

That's what I said to Steve, in our grungy little tavern. His response was not quite what I had been dreading, or expecting.

- "Finally." he said.

"Finally." he repeated. "She's only had a crush on you since she was about eleven. I

told

you that - even though she made me promise not to."

- "Wait - you're not ... mad?"

- "What?" Steve laughed. "You thought I'd be mad? Chris, we've all been hoping you'd finally open your eyes."

- "We?" I was getting more confused by the second.

- "My whole family. Well, maybe not Dad - you know how fathers are - he'd like it best if Sarah became a nun, or something. But Mom thinks you two would be great together. So does Kim."

- "Really?"

- "I just said so. Damn, Chris - what made you think that I'd be mad?"

- "Well ... I was afraid to ask her out, in case ... in case it ended badly. I didn't want things to be awkward between us. Or with your family. I love your family - you know that. I wouldn't want to mess that up."

- "You mean, like a nasty breakup?" asked Steve.

- "Yeah. Exactly." I said.

- "Chris, if you two aren't compatible, for whatever reason - and I can't imagine that, right now - don't you think that Sarah would be smart enough to see it? And if by some fluke she didn't get it - don't you think my Mom would straighten her out? Mom thinks you walk on water as it is."

- "Steve - listen.

I want to sleep with your sister

." I said it that way deliberately, to shock him a bit. I could have been even cruder - but he might have punched me in the face.

He just shook his head. "In case you haven't noticed, Sarah's no shrinking violet. She's brought a few guys over to the house. Most of them were dweebs - in my humble opinion. The idea that she was sleeping with them was enough to make me gag."

"Listen -" he said. "You shouldn't be having this conversation with me - you should be talking to Sarah."

- "I want to. I finally figured it out. I was just ... worried about how you might take it." I said.

Steve looked me in the eye.

- "Chris, I watched you with Carol, and it nearly killed me. I saw what she was doing to you, but I couldn't criticize - you would have defended her. It might have ruined our friendship."

I had to nod. "You're probably right."

- "When you came back from Europe, I was the happiest guy in the world. You seemed to finally be free of that bullshit. Then you took up with Moe."

The way he said that struck me. "I thought you liked Moe." I said.

- "Moe's awesome." he said. "But she wasn't for you. The age difference, your goals ... I couldn't believe you didn't see it."

- "What are you talking about?"

- "Chris - do you remember the face you made when Glen and Ellen announced that they were going to

do

Europe in two weeks?"

- "Yeah." I remembered it well.

- "Moe went with

them

, Chris. You want someone who'll travel with you - that's not Moe. You're not sure if you want to settle down yet - she had settle written all over her. She was on a schedule, and waiting for you wasn't part of the plan."

I couldn't argue with my best friend. He was right.

- "What about the age difference between Sarah and me? You said it was an issue between me and Moe."

- "I was an issue for

Moe

- not for you." he said.

- "When did you get so smart?" I asked.

- "I'm not so smart." he said. "You're just stupid."

- "What about Nina?" I asked.

- "Ah - Nina I really like. That's an amazing girl. You marry her, and I'd be happy for all three of us. But ... you aren't going to do that, are you?"

- "No." I said. I had told, Steve, in great detail, the obstacles between Nina and me. He understood.

- "Is this about the job?" he asked. "Because you're moving back?"

- "I don't know, Steve." I admitted. "I don't know if I got the job yet. I mean - I think I nailed the interview, but you never know. Maybe the superintendent has a niece, or ..."

He nodded.

- "But if Sarah wants to be with me, I'll move heaven and earth to get a job back here." I said. "I've been thinking about Sarah for ... since we double-dated, at least. I just didn't want to screw everything up." I said.

- "You really are an idiot." said Steve. "OK, what do you want me to do?"

***

The principal of Pearson High School called me three nights later.

- "Chris, I'm very pleased to offer you a full-time position ..."

I did a Pete Townsend windmill, and then kicked my leg forward - my slipper flew off and slammed against my balcony window.

***

I gave the Principal at Pinecrest my official resignation. By the end of the day, everybody knew - staff

and

students. I had already told Antonia.

Suddenly, the toxicity level diminished. Anna and Suzanne were prepared to gloat, satisfied with their victory - they had chased me out, as far as they were concerned.

I let them enjoy their triumph. Meanwhile, I completed some unfinished business.

First, I cornered Louise.

- "You're a lovely girl." I said. "I was going to ask you out - before Chantal, before Suzanne, because you're the sweetest girl on staff. Do you want to know why I didn't?"

- "You wanted to ask me out?" she said.

- "I most certainly did. But I couldn't, because someone else had strong feelings for you. Louise - Nelson has been in love for you for

years

- he's just too shy to tell you. Go out with him, or let him down easy, but this is something the two of you have to deal with."

Second, I asked Liz if I could take her and her girls for ice cream. Teachers aren't supposed to 'fraternize' with their students, or the students' families. Do the suits and their lawyers even know what 'fraternize' means? Google it - I dare you.

Marianne and Claudia thought it was funny - and cool - to be out with their Mom and their teacher. We had a remarkably good time, before I dropped the girls off at home, and took their mother out for a late dinner.

- "You're amazing, Liz." I told her. "And I don't mean just the sex that we had.

That

was incredible. I just wanted you to know that I really like you. I enjoyed all of the time we spent together."

"If I was going to stay in Pinecrest, I would have had to re-evaluate my relationship with you. I would be really tempted to ask you out. I love your daughters. I'm not sure that I'm ready to be a father - but when it comes to you and your girls - I would have been sorely tempted."

Liz reached across the table, and squeezed my hand.

***

Antonia and I ate several pounds of wings, and watched an utterly forgettable baseball game. We had a few pints, as well.

She wanted to know - so I told her. I described Moe, and related what she had told me. I told Antonia about Nina, Celine, and Karen. I had to back up, of course, and relate my experience with Carol.

Antonia let me talk for a long time. She listened to my ramblings, without criticizing or judging. When I had finally told her about Sarah, Antonia smiled.

- "Just so you know." she said. "It was painful having to watch you throw yourself at every single female on staff here."

- "Sorry." I said.

- "No - it was entertaining, in a weird kind of way. I kept hoping that you would succeed, but you went from train wreck to train wreck ..."

- "Chantal was no train wreck." I said.

- "Fair enough." said Antonia. "But your other mistakes were

very

entertaining. Worth the price of admission. What the heck were you doing?"

- "Learning." I said. "Tell me this, though: if you had been single, would you have gone out with me? Because you would have been my first choice."

- "You're such a dog." she said, laughing. We had a very good time together, even though the Blue Jays lost. It would be a few more years before they put it all together.

***

I wrote a long letter to Nina.

***

Two weeks after my interview, I drove home again. On the Friday night, Steve and I had a couple of beers.

- "You set it up?" I asked him.

- "Yeah, yeah. All done."

On Saturday, I went apartment hunting. If a decent place was available for the 1st of July, I was ready to grab it. No such luck.

That evening, I drove over to Steve's parent's house. His Mom met me at the door, and enfolded me in a pretty serious hug.

- "We're

so

pleased for you, Chris." she said. "Congratulations."

- "It'll be great to have you around more often." said Steve's Dad. He shook my hand.

Sarah gave me a big hug, too, and a kiss on the cheek. "Congratulations." she said.

I took a step back. "Wow." I said. She was wearing a black dress, with a white stripe. Her long black hair cascaded over her shoulders, to rest on the upper slopes of her generous breasts.

- "What? Too much?" she said. "The Bell is an upscale kind of place."

- "You look wonderful, sweetheart." said her mother.

- "I have to agree." I said.

- "Don't be too late." said her Dad. It sounded like something he had been saying since she turned 14.

In my car, on the way to the restaurant, Sarah told me the bad news.

- "Julia pulled out of our trip." she said.

- "Oh, no. Why?"

- "Her parents had a meltdown. Said they hadn't paid her tuition all those years so that she could 'waste' her money on an expensive vacation."

- "Waste?" I said. "Vacation?"

- "That's what they said."

- "I'm sorry, Sarah. That's too bad."

- "Yeah. So now I have to find someone else who wants to go - someone I can stand, preferably - or go by myself. I know you travelled by yourself, for a lot longer ..."

- "But it's different for girls."

- "Joe Jackson thinks so." she said, with a smile.

When we got to the Bell restaurant, and I gave my name to the hostess, she said "Table for two - right this way, Sir."

That's when Sarah looked at me, and said: "Two? What about Kim and Steve?"

- "Sarah, I have to apologize. It's just the two of us." I said. "I asked your brother to set this up."

- "You did?"

- "I wanted to have dinner with you alone."

She was far too polite to make a scene, and curious enough to want to know why we were here. She just gave me a calm, appraising look. Then she followed the hostess, and we sat down. It was dark, inside the restaurant. They kept the lighting low, and had candles on the tables.

- "Is this about the stagette?" she asked.

- "The what?"

- "Your idea for Steve's stag. If you combine it with Kim's, we can't call it a stag. She thinks it's a great idea, by the way."

- "Good. That's good. But, no - that's not why I asked you to come here." I said.

The waiter came to introduce himself, and offer us drinks. Once he had gone, Sarah grinned at me.

- "Technically," she said, "you didn't ask me. You lured me here under false pretences."

I had to smile. "You're right. OK, the reason I lured you here under false pretences ... I wanted to ask you a question ... well, two questions, now."

- "I'm definitely curious." she said. "Go ahead."

It's easy to rehearse what you want to say, driving your car down the highway. If you strike a false note, you just start over. But I had to get this right the first time.

- "Sarah ... would you go out with me?"

I can't quite describe the look that passed across her face. A cautious smile? Sarah looked ... happy - but careful not to celebrate too early.

- "Meaning?" she asked.

- "I want to go out with you. Dates. A relationship. I want to be your boyfriend."

I want to make love with you

, I thought - but I didn't say that.

- "Whoa!" she said. "How about one date at a time?"

- "You're right. Sarah - would you go out with me - once?"

- "Aren't we already out?" she asked. Now the smile was a real one, full bore. Sarah had excellent teeth. "Although maybe this doesn't count, since you tricked me into coming here."

- "That's why I'm asking." I said. "Sarah - could this be our first date?"

She smiled again, but a tear trickled down her cheek.

- "I waited a long time for you to see me, Chris. To notice me." she said. "What happened? What changed?"

- "I saw you a long time ago, Sarah." I said. "You've always been lovely, and smart, and kind ... only a fool wouldn't have noticed that."

- "Lovely?" she said. Sarah wasn't fishing for compliments. She had been something of an ugly duckling, in her early teens - overweight, crooked teeth, lacking confidence. Braces had helped, quite a bit.

But when she lost weight, and started attracting attention, Sarah had blossomed.

- "You're a beautiful woman." I told her. "And the beauty you possess is so much more than skin deep. You're the kind of girl guys dream about."

- "Thank you." she said, quietly.

- "I mean it."

- "I know you do." she said. "That's why I'm crying."

The waiter chose that moment, unfortunately, to arrive with our drinks. He had the good sense to realize that we weren't ready to order, and left us alone.

- "What changed?" she said. "If you saw me so long ago?"

- "I was stupid. I was afraid that if we dated, but then broke up, that Steve ... your parents ... that they'd be angry. That I could screw up some of the most important relationships in my life."

- "They would never have held that against you, Chris." she said. "Well, Dad, maybe. But my Mom and Steve ..."

- "There was you, too. I didn't want to hurt you."

- "By going out with me, and then having to break it off?"

- "It may sound stupid. But my only experience of breakups, for a long time, was being on the receiving end."

- "Carol?" said Sarah.

- "Yeah. And Moe - twice." I admitted. "I couldn't envision doing that to you. The only way I could imagine not hurting you, and not ruining my relationship with your family, was if we got married and lived happily ever after."

- "You imagined yourself married to me?" she asked.

- "Yes. Just ... in my daydreams."

- "That's ... " said Sarah. "But you haven't answered my question: what changed?"

- "Honestly?"

- "Of course, honestly!" she said. "What happened to change your mind?"

- "We painted your brother's apartment."

- "What?" She was curious again.

- "You didn't try to boss me around." I said. "I didn't have to tell you what to do. You just knew - or you followed my lead. We worked well together."

- "Really?"

- "Plus you looked incredibly hot in those shorts and that halter top."

She laughed at that. "Seriously?"

- "I've heard from professional painters - the last thing they want to do is paint their own homes, or put up wallpaper, with their wives or girlfriends. Apparently, it's a deal breaker. I was a bit freaked out - when I found how much I enjoyed working with you."

Sarah smiled. "That might be the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me."

- "You did it again, when we helped Steve move into his apartment. And they wouldn't be getting married, if it wasn't for you. You had the right idea, to get them over their shyness with each other."

- "That was both of us." she said.

- "Mostly you, with an assist from me." I said. That's what I mean, Sarah - we work well together. I respect your ability, on top of everything else."

- "Everything else?"

- "As I've said: beauty, brains, kindness ..."

She blushed. One of Sarah's most endearing qualities was how unaware she was of her own loveliness. I don't mean to suggest that she didn't spend time on her makeup, or that she never primped in front of a mirror.

But Sarah just tried to make herself look better - she didn't believe that she was the hottest woman in the room - and she certainly never acted that way.

The waiter had held off as long as he could. He showed up next to me. "I'm sorry - but I don't want you to pass out from starvation. Can I get you something to eat?"

- "I'm sorry." said Sarah "We haven't even looked at the menu."

- "Can I order for you?" I asked her.

Sarah had just picked up the menu, but she was willing to indulge me.

- OK - let's see what you've got."

- "We'll share a large Caesar salad." I told the waiter. "The lady will have the grilled calamari, and I'll have the mussels - with fries."

When the waiter had left, Sarah laughed. "You didn't even look at the menu. How do you they even have that stuff? And who told you that I like calamari?"

- "Your brother." I said. "We came here last night, to scout the place out."

- "Sneaky."

- "Could we discuss our second date?" I asked. "I was thinking Dim Sum - Chinese breakfast. Tomorrow morning, before I drive back."

Sarah looked thoughtful. "How much of this is about your job at Pearson?"

- "A lot." I agreed. "But I made up my mind before I knew whether I was going to get it, or not. If it fell through, I was going to ask you if we could have a long-distance relationship, until I could find a job back here. Believe me, I would have tried everything to get a job here."

Sarah nodded. But she still seemed to have something on her mind.

- "What is it?" I asked.

- "Forgive me if this is rude." she said. "But ... are you over Moe?"

- "Long time ago. She's married, and pregnant. And it wouldn't have worked out between us, in the long run. I'm pretty sure of that, now." Steve was right about that. I told her what her brother had said.

- "And Nina?"

- "Honest answer?"

- "Yes, please." she said.

- "If Nina lived here - or even close - I would have asked her to marry me two years ago. But both of us have deep roots, in very different places, that are too far apart."

- "Thank you." said Sarah. "I shouldn't have asked that. But ... if you want to be my boyfriend, I have to know that you're over your ex. Exes."

- "I am. I wouldn't be asking you to go out with me, otherwise." I said. "How is it that you know me so well?"

We somehow got to talking about Steve, Kim, and her family. I didn't notice the passage of time, until the waiter returned, with our salad. We ordered another round of drinks.

- "Can I ask my second question?" I said.

- "That's right!" she said. "You said

two

questions. Now I'm really curious."

- "I ... " There was no smooth way to say this. "Could I go to Europe with you in August?"

- "What?" This time she was definitely caught off guard.

- "Since Julia backed out ... and because I'd really like to go back to Europe with you. I think we'd be excellent travel partners."

- "That's one heck of a 3rd date." she said. "You're serious?"

- "Yes."

- "This is ... a lot to take in, all at once." she said. "I mean - I've been hoping, for a long time, that you would ... but this isn't the way I expected it to happen ..."

- "I'm sorry."

Sarah reached across the table, and took my hand. "Don't be. This is

better

."

- "Oh."

- "You've made me very happy.

Very

happy. I want to jump up and high five the waiter." said Sarah. I want to jump in your lap and kiss you -"

I got up from my chair, and slid onto the bench beside her.

Our first kiss was a little over-energetic - she might have bruised my lips when she slammed into me. Kissing while smiling does have its perils. Our arms went around each other, and she squeezed me tight. When I didn't pull away from her embrace, though, Sarah settled down, and our kiss became something different.

It was a kiss of affirmation, then a celebration, and then, finally, a first sensual exploration. We had to stop, before I started groping her in the restaurant. It was dimly lit, but it wasn't

that

dark.

When we finally broke apart, we could hear the other restaurant patrons applauding.

- "First date." said Sarah.

We were both blushing, a bit, after that.

It was harder, afterwards, to talk of inconsequential things. Sarah wanted to talk about Europe, but I forestalled her.