Life slowly got back to normal after the death of my best friend. Well I had the fast growing bump to consider, and then it decided it wanted out a few months later, a week earlier than it should. Now I had calmed down since Maria had died, my swearing had been curbed, because I didn't want my kid yelling 'fuck off' as it came out! But I was bang on form in the hospital, swear words and things just flowed non stop. I mean this little thing was in such a hurry! Martin sat there going green and trying to wipe my brow, I mean how fucking useful is that! Finally I felt it ease out. The midwife got hold of it and started rubbing it with a towel, then it cried, so did Martin, and so did I.
"It's a girl, it's a little girl," he whimpered through his tears.
I know these days you get to know before the baby is born, but Martin and I made it clear we didn't want to know early on. So we had a daughter, Kelly Maria, Kelly after my granny, and Maria, well you know. I did clear it with Maria's mum first if it was a girl. She was quite emotional about it. But she smiled and said it would mean a lot to her.
So it was all shitty nappies, and feeding for the first few months. I never went back to school, apart from showing Kelly off once. So things really were set up and I had calmed down. Sex was something Martin and I did now and then, and I thought this was my lot. Wrong!
Little Kelly was 16 months old, and I had dropped her off with my mother in law. Oh yes, Martin and I had married just over a year ago. So there I was at home alone when the door bell goes. I stood there and just looked at him.
"What the fuck do you want?" I spat.
"Can I come in?"
"Kicked you out has she? I bloody well knew it, still it serves you right."
He walked past me and stood waiting for me to shut the door.
"Gina, I've come to try and patch things up. Please, she misses you."
I was in the kitchen by now banging cups around, and waiting for the kettle to boil.
"You know mum is bloody livid with you, still," I mumbled.
"Well she dumped me, she wanted the divorce," Andrew snapped.
"Yes, but you didn't have to go round flaunting your tart in her face did you?"
We just stared at each other for a few moments.
"Look, I told her it was an accident bumping into her like that."
I narrowed my eyes, "Oh yeah, you took that thick shit to mum's favourite restaurant on her birthday. Do you know just how bloody humiliating that was for us?"
I slid the cup and the sugar bowl over to him.
"Where is, Kelly?"
"She is at Audrey's, while I catch up around here. And don't change the subject."
"Gina, she needs you, will you please speak to her? We are splitting up."
"So why didn't you phone? Why did you have to come round here?"
I turned away from him as the tears started to flow.
"Gina, it is you I want. I guess I always have," he mumbled.
"Oh you bastard, I'm married now, fucking hell, you really do pick your moments?"
"Look I'm going away, come with me, leave him a note."
"Yeah, why not run off? Hi Martin, your tea is in the oven, I've ironed you shirt, and by the way I'm fucking off with Kelly and going to live with my ex stepfather!"
He looked down at the cup and back to me.
"Do you know I came to your grotty little flat once? Kelly was just two months old. I had packed enough feeds for her for a few days. I saw Lucy's car outside so I looked down from the street into your basement flat. She was bouncing up and down on your dick like the slut she is."
"Jesus, why didn't you call me?"
"Because I felt a right bloody fool, and I was jealous."
"I'm sorry, I didn't know," he said, rubbing his hand across his brow.
"Well don't worry. I just made it home before Martin. Then I was told she had moved in with you, bloody hell, I just couldn't believe it."
He looked down at the floor.
"So where are you going?"
He shrugged and shook his head, "Just away from here, I don't know."
"So why all this shit about Lucy needing me?"
"Because she does need you, if you don't want to be with me."
"I can't believe this, you always kept me on my feet, and if it was me planning to run off with you, you would tell me not to be so stupid."
I watched him move to the door, he looked back at me.
"Do you love him?"
"I can't just leave Martin, he needs me. I'm his wife and the mother of his kid."
"That wasn't the question," he said, giving me one last look.
As soon as the door closed behind him, I sunk to my knees in tears.
Lucy phoned me a few days later. We talked a little on the phone, I was a little guarded at first, she had hurt my mum and me by shacking up with Andrew, but I guess I needed a friend, but it still took me a while to see her without picturing Andrew fucking her.
So I guess having a kid at 19 I fell out of my youth too quickly. While Jackie and the rest went out dancing and clubbing, I was sat at home looking after Kelly. It wasn't long before they stopped calling me, and I got used to being a housewife. Martin was glad I was friends with Lucy again. Lucy wanted me to go clubbing and it took me a few days of her pestering me until I agreed.
For the first time in ages I did myself up like I used to. I even had to buy new makeup. Martin bought me a new dress, a tight purple mini dress that showed off my curves. Martin's mum had Kelly for the night so he could join us later. Martin was off out with Billy, Kevin, and Scott. Scott worked with Martin, and he was around 27 and so bloody sure of himself. But Martin liked him, and so did Jackie.
"You look bloody gorgeous," Martin said when he saw me in my dress and black high heels.
I pushed him away as he went to kiss me.
"Don't you dare smudge my makeup, wait until we get home. Martin, this is really short, are you sure you don't mind me wearing it?"
"Nope, besides I'll see you in the nightclub. Are those tights or stockings?"
I looked down at my black nylon clad legs.
"Tights, I can't wear stockings in a dress this short, I'll have men coming onto me all night," I said with a giggle.
"Just like you did when you were younger then," he said with a grin.
Lucy came round to get me and we went out. Now I used to be able to knock back the vodka with no trouble. But I knew I would have to take it easy, it didn't stop Lucy egging me on, but I held out. I was tipsy and happy by just after 11, and the constant flow of men we had to fend off was just like old times. We went onto the club in a happy mood. When we entered the bar we saw the boys eyeing us up. Scott was standing there eyeing me from head to toe, like he wanted to eat me.
"Well don't you look hot all scrubbed up?" he whispered in my ear.
The bloody nerve of the guy! His hand was around my waist and he was pulling me against him, hip to hip. I twisted away from him, and I then saw the same devouring look on Billy and Kevin's face.
"Where is Martin?" I asked.
Kevin just grinned and pointed over to a drunken looking husband, who was sat chatting to a couple of plain looking girls.
