XXXVII
"No! No!"
Some girls stood out, however. One was Tammy, whose cheesy name had led me to assume she was American, but who turned out to be English: from Billericay, of all places. She was a state-school girl who had got swept up in one of Oxbridge's occasional (and unconvincing) efforts to demonstrate that it is not the preserve of the middle and upper classes but will take people from Essex council estates too. The girl had character, I must say; her overwhelming craving for me vied with an equally powerful need to know what on earth was going on, and for a few moments the latter even got its nose in front. When I kissed her she responded with passion then seemed to force herself to pull away.
"What's the matter?" I demanded impatiently. I had a schedule to keep, after all.
She gulped in several deep breaths as she struggled to contain her obvious desire to throw herself back into my arms. "Oh, James, I feel so -- James, I want you so much -- but --" she stammered before blurting out, "What the fuck is going on?"
"Don't worry about it," I hazarded. It was worth a try, but she was not to be so easily fobbed off.
"But I'm so confused," she wailed. "I've never felt this way before, not about anyone. And Emma and Sara, downstairs, I could see in their eyes that they're the same. And the other girls I've seen here, the redhead that showed me up here, and the girl that gave me a lift from the station -- you must know the one I mean, she drives like a lunatic --; they're beautiful and they're yours, too, aren't they?"
I admitted it.
"And I saw some others, a couple of black girls, Elspeth from Uni -- all yours, too?"
Again I admitted it and she gasped. "But how many --? I mean, how do you --? All of us..." she trailed off helplessly.
"I just seem to have this effect on beautiful women," I told her modestly. "And you are lovely, Tammy," I went on, taking her in my arms. She was, too; she had big brown eyes in a bright (but currently troubled) freckly face; her auburn hair was cut quite short, not something I usually like but it suited her. Above average height with particularly good legs, she was generally trimmer than I prefer (but that, I thought, will soon be taken care of) and, crucially, she had a very nice pair of tits.
She flinched as if thinking of again pulling back but her urge to be close was too strong to resist and she put her arms around me. She had not finished arguing, though. Even as I ran my hands over her body and she writhed with pleasure and desire, she leant her head against my chest and whispered, "But ... but ... James, I want you, I need you, but ... but ... you're just inviting me to join your harem, aren't you? That's all it is; your own private harem."
I remembered the note she had written me at the garden party. "Tammy, Tammy," I murmured, "I thought you wanted to give me every hole you've got, and then some."
She hugged me even tighter. "Oh, James! You remembered. Yes, yes, that's just what I want. Ever since I first saw you I haven't been able to think about anything else. I've had this feeling, all the time ... I don't know how to describe it, it's just an endless aching lust. It's like my insides are tearing themselves apart. But," she went on, finding from somewhere the resolve to pull away again, "I -- I'm frightened, James. I don't understand what's happening."
With a little forcefulness I could, I knew, have taken her with only token resistance, but I did not want her that way. "Tammy, I'm not going to hurt you," I said soothingly.
"Look," she said, abruptly getting a grip of herself, "I'm no innocent. I fuck around a lot, I know I do. And why shouldn't I? I like it. And more holes is a big fantasy of mine. I mean, there just aren't enough, are there?"
I was taken aback by her sudden crude frankness. "Well," I thought to myself, "you can take the girl out of Essex, but you can't take Essex out of the girl."
"I've been around," she continued. "But I've never heard of anything like this. That's what scares me. You've done something to me, I don't know what, and I don't know how to escape."
"Would you?" I asked. "Escape, I mean. If you could?"