Chris shrugged his shoulders. "Sorry buddy. We'll keep an eye out for you."
I nodded and left the room without waiting for Chris. I hope the bitch who stole my pants loses his thieving hand in a nasty way.
I was into my second week at The Good Shepherd, one of the four main homeless shelters in Ottawa, with three of them situated within a 1 km radius of each other in the downtown area, off Rideau Street. Ottawa is my home city; I was born and raised here, me and my younger brother. At the age of eleven, my parents divorced. My dad headed to Calgary to try and make some oil money while I stayed with my mom and brother in Ottawa. We moved from a three bedroom house in Orleans into a two bedroom apartment at Merivale and West Hunt Club in the west of the city.
My mom was still an attractive woman and quite young looking for her early thirties. Before long, other men noticed she was single and available; she remarried within two years of divorcing my dad. The new husband was a guy she worked with, he was ten years older and he was white. I could not see how that was going to work; especially when she became pregnant for him at thirty-five. I was thirteen years old; I called him by his first name, Kevin. He was a good guy really but had I reached my teens. I followed my peers and got a bit rebellious. I could not take Kevin scolding me or giving me any punishment. That lead to conflict with my mom, and things came to a head after Grade 12.
After one big bust up where I physically attacked Kevin, I was told to leave. I was run out of the family home, because of that old asshole. I cursed him to the ground. I stayed at a buddy's home for a few months, before finding a batchelor flat rental. I struggled to work and maintain a roof over my head. After a few years of that, I got in contact with my Dad. I was on my way to Alberta before he had to chance to know why I had called. In Calgary, I received a lukewarm reception from my dad at his three bedroom house that he shared with two other guys. He acted as if I was some zit to be erased and fast, if not permanently. He was enjoying freedom from the chains of marriage and had girlfriends coming out of his ears.
Calgary looked better than Ottawa in the summer time so I hung around, finding mostly manual work through a temping agency, then I was working with my Dad. A couple of brutal winters soon sent me running like a gazelle escaping from a lion. That and a fight with my Dad, although not before I begged some money from him, having to practically shove my birth certificate in his face to convince him, the tight asshole. I bought a coach trip to Montreal, where I had family on my mom's side. Here again, I was treated as if I was one of the ten great plagues, and so eventually found myself back in Ottawa.
With a big smile and a few juicy horror stories, I got myself into mom's good books, although Kevin was now just cool towards me and not the street kind of cool either. A month later, I had a big bust up with him and got thrown out the house again. Not even the dignity of allowing myself to leave, they threw me out. I was twenty-six years old now, so there was less guilt from my mom this time. At least it was not winter. I was out on my backside on the bare streets of Ottawa with my backpack and some clothes in a sports holdall. I let with some choice foul words towards the whole of them which insured that any chance of reconciliation was as likely as a heatwave in the Arctic.
So I slept outside, not really knowing where to go, since I had lost contact with most of my old Ottawa buddies. I slept under trees, on park benches, at bus stations and sometimes in shopping malls. It was all good when the weather was nice. It was so crappy when the rain fell and I had to run for cover.
After one night when I got so drenched after security kicked me out of Carlingwood Mall on Baseline Road, I dried off at a local sports centre and then took the bus downtown. I went to the YMCA on Argyle Street, as that was the only place I knew that could take in homeless people. They said they had no space and referred me to the Salvation Army on George Street. I was not too impressed with the Sally's drab, grubby looking building, so I was not too upset when they said they were full too. They called the nearby Good Shepherd, who said that I should call them later, around 7pm, once they had confirmed how many people would be sleeping there that night.
So I hung around downtown, becoming thoroughly bored as there was not much to the area once you had walked out the Rideau Centre shopping mall. I bought a large coffee at Tim Hortons and drunk it very slowly by the front window as I watched the Ottawa female hotty club strolling by. It was very insightful; I never realised that there were that much hot girls in Ottawa as I did on that early summer's day on Rideau Street.
By 7pm, by which time hunger was digging out my insides, I walked the ten minutes it took to get to the Good Shepherd, who thankfully confirmed that they did have a bed available: bed E28. A young, fit looking female member of staff (she had a small jacket on that said Β'staff' escorted me to my quarters, a small room with three bunk beds and six high school size lockers. Welcome to the jungle! I put the larger of my two backpacks in the locker that was assigned to my bed number, tucked my wallet in my inside jacket pocket, washed my face in the washroom, picked up my other backpack and headed out to the adjacent building on the other side of the road that served as the Good Shepherd's soup kitchen. They had a drop in centre going on in there by this time, so I was able to get some vegetable soup, some bread with butter and a hot coffee while a 32" flat screen TV showed a movie on Showcase. I thought, this shit ain't so bad. There was a fairly large cooking area where the food was prepared and handed to us over a glass counter. We sat in an extensive vinyl floored area with tables and chairs there were fixed to the floor.
The soup kitchen had a mix of grubby looking men, in various states of cleanliness. Some looked like they were straight off the mean streets, in their soiled, creased and ill fitting clothing; others were dressed in manual workfare of jeans and safety shoes and there were a few half-decent guys, who would not look out of place in a line up for Tim Hortons. There were a few dour looking females, and the odd black and Aboriginal face in the mix. At least I was not the sole visible minority in this line up of misery.
Homeless shelters. I never in my life thought I would end up in one of them. I read that they were dangerous, violent, dirty, invaded by bed bugs and polluted with the lowest of the low. I read that many homeless people would rather take their chances on the street than stay in a homeless shelter. That the staff treated you like cattle, pushing and prodding you to move that way, go this way, take that bed, take these blankets, take your possessions elsewhere, take our advice, take our shit and be grateful.
The reality; not so bad, not so good. Maybe I got lucky, but The Good Shepherd was bearable. I was thankful for a bed in a room and not a mat on the floor. The shelter held two washrooms, a shower room, a tub room, a TV room, a lounge area (just another room with a few chairs) with an attached elevated patio area for smokers. The bedding was cleaned daily in their in-house laundry and you could wash your clothes there too once all the sheets and towels were done. And there were filling meals three times a day at the soup kitchen for Good Shepherd residents.
The residents were a mixed bunch of good guys, some A plus dumb-asses, drug addicts and the mentally challenged (the loonie toonies). The shelter was a renovated old school building the size of an average grocery store, with three floors. The building itself was okay; it was the residents who decided whether they wanted to keep it clean or not. And too many times it was not.