Demetrius

Chapter 19

When Alexis entered their apartment she was surprised to find Demetri sitting naked in the living room, staring into the darkness. She sat to his right taking his hand in hers without speaking, leaning her head against his shoulder. Their closeness was all that mattered to them at the time. They had their own thoughts and feelings to resolve; as a result, neither of them felt the need to speak. In time he told her about his dream and how it made him feel when he hated humans.

"I can't get the sound of the pitchfork out of my head, when it was thrust into you and our newborn," he said. She told him it was a nightmare and in reality no human had the ability to sneak up on a vampire in such a way.

"In addition to our enhanced sight and superior hearing we can smell them a mile away when the wind is right. You'll be able to do it soon enough I hope," she assured him.

Turning to rest on her left hip, she moved her right leg onto his lap when he felt how cold she was. He knew cold was relative but her flesh against his felt at least twenty degrees different. He knew a human would be shivering and grabbing for the blanket draping the back of the sofa but apparently she was comfortable. All the same he took the blanket putting it over them, hugging her in the joy he felt in having her there with him. Maybe she read his mind when she asked,

"Demetri when did you first begin to feel you loved me?"

He thought about it awhile, wondering how it was possible in the first place.

"I guess it was when you climbed off your high-horse and apologized for being so arrogant and superior. When I thought you were capable of loving. Or maybe it was when you apologized to me when you felt you weren't prepared to have sex with me. Thankfully you had the presence of mind to let me know my feelings mattered to you. You could've given up and stormed out the door but you stayed to explain how you felt.

"Perhaps it was when I first saw how beautiful your eyes were, how soft and yielding they could be when you wanted. Or maybe it was after the dream I'd been changed and thought your interest in me was sinister, realizing you wouldn't abandon me after all. Or maybe it was how you grabbed hold of me as though you would never let anything happen to me on the roller-coaster. And then, it could've been the night you allowed me to have sex with you completely and when you told me you hadn't been with others believing it was what I wanted of you.

"No, it was when I saw you cry for the first time. You didn't understand it and looked embarrassed. I think I knew you were humbled by the experience, needing reassurance in your confused emotional state."

Her head was resting on his chest when he felt her tears, though she quickly wiped them away. In disbelief he tried to raise her head so he could see her face but she prevented him from doing so. He also thought he heard a sniffle though to this very day, she denies it.

"I must tell you some things about my past: When I was a young boy and having seen the movie E.T. for the first time. I never knew what happened to my mother and I tried to resolve it in many ways. One way was in thinking she was abducted by aliens. I didn't think she was unhappy, I only thought she wasn't able to contact me. I remember wishing I could be abducted too so I could be with her. Having those thoughts was how I hung onto my love for her, always believing she loved and missed me as much as I did."

"But you knew you couldn't trust me due to my nature," she offered not understanding the irrationality of love at times.

"Actually I didn't trust you and didn't think I could love you at first. I thought you'd probably change me when least expected, all the while hoping you'd give me time to make my own choice. The more I found myself liking you the less I cared about what I once feared. I guess I began to trust and believe in you which are parts of what love is. When I realized my ingesting of your bodily fluids predisposed me to vampirism, I gave up. Neither you nor my mother told me what effects they'd have on me. It was the underhanded trick the two of you used. One I didn't see coming in my naiveté. I knew I'd been beaten and when I gave up, I gave myself to you in the spirit of love, hoping my love would instill love in you. I guess I hoped you and my mother had my best interest in mind. Admittedly I was adrift in life anyway, susceptible to change, good, bad or indifferent."

"It'll be okay. You'll see. Your mother and I do have your best interest in mind," she said reassuring him though he was not yet convinced.

"Let's go to bed. I like feeling your hot human sperm squirting in me, warming me from the inside out."