Crucifix: Longing

Dear Reader...This is the second story in a three part series with the prefix title 'Crucifix'. And no...they are not OVERTLY religious, but they do have an undercurrent of it...and all the main characters WEAR crucifixes.

That in mind, should you be reading this, without having read the first story, Crucifix: Temptation, you may want to read it first as it will help to bridge some of the information dealing with one of the main characters. Oh, and if you are absolutely loath to reading stories that aren't immediately 'wham bam let's have sex again, Sam'...maybe this isn't the story for you. But if you're game...please, enjoy! Browniepoints.

{...} indicate the thoughts of the speaker.

****

CHAPTER 1. ERIN

"What's this one?" Dr. Crystina Shepherd, called out to the paramedic rushing to get the gurney situated in the trauma bay.

"Female, 22, named Erin Durant."

"In the pile up on the bypass?"

"Yes."

"Vitals?"

He looked down at the chart that lay on Erin's chest. "BP 140 over 100. Pulse 110. Thrown from the vehicle. No seat belt. Landed in the ditch. She was unconscious when we got there. Came out of it for a while, but fell back. Shallow breathing, left lung collapse. Inserted a chest tube and intubated en route. Broken right femur, left tibia. Right humorous. That's all we could see off hand, doctor."

Dr. Shepherd looked down at the thin bloodied body which lay strapped to the backboard. She called to the unconscious girl, "Erin, can you hear me? Erin?" With her penlight out, she opened Erin's eyes and flashed the bright light across her pupils, smiling slightly when she saw a positive reaction. Dr. Shepherd was surprised to see that Erin's eyes were a deep golden yellow. A color so rare she'd only seen it once before...for real that is. Crystina double checked to see if her patient was wearing contacts as they'd have to be removed. {Damn, they're real.}

Even through the broad straps, blood, and dirt, Dr. Shepherd could tell that Erin Durant was a pretty girl. And she was. Erin was about five feet nine and was barely one hundred thirty pounds and not one bit of it was fat. It was pure muscle. Her hair was a soft, wavy auburn and her skin was creamy white. She obviously spent very little time out in the sun. A plus in today's world, well, at least for those concerned about skin cancer.

"Erin. If you can hear me, I need you to open your eyes." Dr. Shepherd placed her icy cold, gloved hand on Erin's shoulder. "Erin, open your eyes for me, okay."

The shock of cold on Erin's hot skin caused her eyes to fly open. {What the Hell? What's going on? Where am I?} The harsh white lights pierced her eyes, causing her to squint. Erin tried to open her mouth to talk, but couldn't. She tried to lift her head, but couldn't. Her arms, but couldn't. She became frantic and tried to squirm free of whatever it was that restrained her.

"Erin, you need to calm down." Dr. Shepherd looked at the nurse to her side and then back down at her patient, "Erin you're in the trauma center at Grady Memorial. You were in a car accident, Erin. Do you remember the accident?"

{What in the hell is she talking about? Accident? Trauma center? God, my head. Why can't I move my head? Shit, I'm going to miss the party. I'm going to miss my own party. I've gotta go. Damn, why does my head hurt? God.} Erin stared up at the shadowy figure. She knew it was a woman, the voice told her as much, but as far as beyond that Erin had no clue. {Am I dreaming? Wake up. Erin, wake up!}

Erin started to cough, something was in her throat. It hurt. {What is that? Can't breathe. Oh, God, I can't breathe.} Her coughing became more frenzied.

"Erin, you've got to settle down. It's a tube to help you breathe. We're going to take it out in just a few minutes, okay, Erin. Just relax." Dr. Shepherd touched Erin's cheek, "You're alright. But you've got to calm down." She watched as the panic stricken girl tried to thrash herself free from the binding which held her prisoner. She knew her patient was coming to realize how badly her body hurt as a pained grimace set up on her young face.

And, dear God, did she ever hurt. It was pain unlike she'd ever felt before. Erin's chest felt like someone had stabbed her clear through to her core. Her arm pulsed with such an intensity she thought she was going to die and her head. Dear God, had someone smashed her head into a wall? {Accident? Wait. The car. James. Where's James? I hurt. Help me. Help me. HELP ME!}

The pain was so intense, Erin fell back into a blessed state of unconsciousness. The darkness that surrounded her brought with it a quiet peace. The words that she kept hearing around her swam through her dreams. {legs... James... broken ... Randy... Karen... neck...} Erin's subconscious mind sent her somewhere else, somewhere away from the chaos and confusion that clouded her thoughts....................

******

....................The sound of applause filled Erin's ears and the sight of the audience standing as they brought their hands together in appreciation and admiration of her performance was staggering. She graciously took one of the lavish bouquets from the stage manager. Erin inhaled the fragrant flowers and beamed at the crowd which rewarded her hard work with their smiles, claps, and shouts of 'brava'.

As Giselle, she'd moved them. As a dancer, she'd arrived. As a woman, she was in love. She looked over at James as he stood in the wings applauding her. Erin could think of nothing but the moment. The joy.

The curtain closed for the final time and Erin turned to her fellow cast mates and beamed. Karen ran onto the stage, "Marvelous! I can't believe it. You were awesome!" Karen grabbed her little sister around the waist and squeezed her. "I'm so proud of you! God, you were so good!"

"Thank you, Karen. Oh, thank you!" Erin spun around on her pointes and felt like she could fly. "I can't believe it. It was amazing, wasn't it?" She looked once more over at James and then back at her sister, "Sorry, Karen." She ran to him.

Karen shook her head and remembered how silly she was when she and Randy were getting close to their wedding date. {Ah, youth. A couple of years and a couple of kids and that'll slow down.}

James shook his head too, only it wasn't in recognition of Erin's youth, rather it was to prepare himself to catch her. No, he wasn't a dancer, but he definitely spent his fair share of time dancing with her, so to say. He held his arms open and felt her jump into him. As her legs wrapped around his midsection, the intense passion he felt while watching her perform and having her so close to him was overwhelming. And, God, she was so light. He imagined holding her must be like holding a fairy. "God, Erin, you're magnificent."

"Thank you, James. So are you." Erin looked at him and could see the love he held for her burning behind his inky black eyes. She felt him pressing against her. Erin smiled and whispered in his ear, "James, I think you're feeling very good. Right?"

"Yes." He grinned at her, "I can't help it. It must be your costume. Maybe it's your hair. Or maybe, I'm just fucking in love with you Erin." He pressed his lips tenderly against hers and felt her lips part beneath the pressure of his.

His silky tongue mingled with hers and she could taste a hint of bourbon. "Let's go with that last one, James...I like it best." He was divine. And she was swept away in the moment. The applause, the adoration, and those eyes of his made her want to feel him in her. "God, James, I love you so much." Erin wanted to push him into a darkened corner of the theatre and let him kiss her from head to toe. She started to tug on his tie. "Let's go. Right now. Please...please."

"Erin, settle down, baby. You've got to go to the party and say your 'thank yous'. And when you're done," he kissed her earlobe and sucked on it a little, too, "I'm all yours. I promise."

"Oh, you're no fun! Come on, James. I know you want to." Erin whispered in his ear. "Please. I'm begging. Please." She slowly sucked on his earlobe in return for his kisses.

"Jesus Christ, Erin, please don't do this here." James could fall headfirst into her golden eyes when she begged. And he could feel her slowly moving her hips against him and it was driving him crazy. "Damn, damn, damn." James turned and headed toward her dressing room.

Randy Chambers, Erin's brother-in-law, unexpectedly interrupted the couple in the dimly lit corridor. "Erin...James. Oh, shit. God, I'm sorry. I...uh...I," he was at a loss for words. He looked at Erin and was rapt in her beaming smile. Something about Erin always made him a hot and watching her leisurely rocking her hips against James was making him hurt. {Goddamn, why can't Karen do that?}

"Oh, Randy," Erin grinned at him, "did you need me?" She knew he'd wanted her since the first day he'd met her and she always made him suffer for it, too. While she adored him, he was a great husband and a superior father, she did get a kick out of seeing him squirm. And was he ever squirming.

Randy looked at his feet and then back up at her, "I...uh...sorry, Karen wanted to know when...," he looked at James and then back at Erin, "you know, I'll just tell her you'll be a few minutes." Randy cleared his throat, "Or...maybe longer. Yeah, longer. I'll just tell her that." He turned quickly and started off in the other direction.

James could hear Erin giggling, "Erin, you're going to kill him one day! Poor guy's gonna just have a fucking heart attack." But deep inside, James loved it. He loved knowing that she could make Randy, who had to be stuffiest banker in all of Atlanta, so hard he could barely walk. James especially loved knowing that she was his and no one else's. "Ok, you win, Erin. Let's go have some fun." James set her down and almost stumbled himself when he realized how hard he'd become as she pulled him toward her dressing room.

For someone so very tiny, Erin certainly was one strong girl. She practically dragged him down the hallway to the room and slammed the door quickly behind them. "Damn, girl, slow down." Erin tugged on his belt and fell to her knees. "Erin, calm down. Baby. I'm not going anywh...hey! Hey, what are you doing?"

James knew exactly what she was doing. And he fell into the wall when he felt her lips on his hot head. "Holy shit! Oh, my God, Erin." He could feel her giggling through his shaft. She was amazing. And she was all his. James leaned back more, relaxed against the wall and let her have her way with him.

She ran her tongue up and down his hot cock and then kissed his aching balls. James tried to speak, but had to wait for her to slow down a bit. "Goddamn, Erin. That's so good." He could barely catch his breath as her tongue lovingly tortured him.

Erin stopped her assault and looked up at him. "You like it? You want more? Baby, you want more, don't you?" She gazed up at him with her wide, innocent looking eyes on an even sweeter face. Then she put her finger to the tip of his cock and lifted up a drop of his silky precum and put it to her lips. Then she licked her finger tip as though she were getting the last taste of some tasty dish. "Tell me, baby, you want more don't you?"

James looked down into her stunning golden eyes. He couldn't believe how astonishingly beautiful she was. He could barely whisper the word, "Yes." Then James inhaled deeply and felt his own eyes closing as her lips reclaimed him.

Erin started to suck on him and could feel all the muscles in his legs tense up with her gentle motion. She milked him so softly he wanted to cry. He placed his hand lightly on her head, stroking her silky hair, and could feel her moving over him. God, he wanted to cum in her so badly. But he wanted it to go on and on, too. It was truly the most magnificent anguish any man would dream to endure.

And through it, James tried so hard to not grab her hair and force her head down further on him. He knew she hated that. Erin had one rule, 'she was in charge...until she let him be.' It was such a delightfully simple rule, for such a delightfully intimate thing. It was as though she could hear is soul crying out for more. Erin relaxed her neck. And he started to move her as he pleased. James couldn't imagine there was anything better. Well, maybe being inside her. Yes, that was amazing to, but on a wholly different level.

He wove his hands within her hair and started to push and pull her back and forth. And she never stopped moving that amazing tongue of hers. James closed his eyes and let himself fly away. He was soaring and it felt so good. James could feel her sucking him with greater vigor as he came in her loving mouth. She was drinking him, taking him in like a glass of sweet brandy and he couldn't believe how long his orgasm lasted within her brilliant mouth.

When she felt that there was no more of him to swallow, Erin gently stopped sucking him and looked up into his eyes. She slinked up his torso and kissed him, "I want you in me, James, now, please."

The taste of him on her lips and in her mouth made her weak, "Yes, baby, yes." He put his arms around her and together they started to remove her bodysuit which clung to her every curve like some amazing second skin. "I need to be in you."

Erin felt him sucking on her exposed breasts and wanted to cry out in utter joy. But all she could do was whisper, "God, James, I want you in me...I do, I do." She felt his hands tug the suit down further.

"Yes, baby, yes." James grinned up at her and slid the costume down her hips. He could smell the wanton lust that came from her most delicate, most treasured center and he had to have a taste. He put his lips to her and gently licked her. She tasted divine, angelic. And he wanted more.

Erin laid back and relaxed. She felt his tongue glide across her. She ached for him, and God it felt so good. So good ....................

***

.................... Erin could feel someone or something jostling her. {Stop. Stop! STOP!} She felt a sharp pain rip through her arm and wanted to scream. But she couldn't. {What's happening to me?} She opened her eyes and could see that she was inside a huge machine. {God, what's going on? Where am I?} Hot tears streamed down her face.

She heard a soft male voice calling to her, "Erin." He sounded miles away. "Erin, you're going to hear some loud clicking. You're going to be alright. Just breathe and try to stay still." She tried to squirm herself free but the pain and restraints kept her from moving more than a hair.

Erin heard his voice once again, only it was stronger and must more authoritative, "Erin, you have to try and be still. I know you're in pain. I promise that we'll be done soon. We just have to check your chest and abdomen."

With her eyes closed and tear streaming down her face, Erin tried her best to relax. But the sound from the machine was deafening. She was in so much pain. And her throat hurt so badly, like someone had shoved a burning pipe wrapped in sandpaper down her throat then yanked it out of her with little sympathy. But at least she could breathe easier, even if it was painful. {Mom? James? Somebody? Please tell me what's going on?} She closed her eyes to the sound and the pain....................

*****

.................... "Come on you two." Karen said loudly as she knocked on the door to Erin's dressing room. "We've got to go. They're waiting for you at the party. You can do whatever it is you're doing later. Erin, really, Mama and Daddy are at the restaurant already. I'm sorry. Please..."

James rolled off of Erin, shook his head, sighed and started to button his shirt. "Sorry, Baby. Your public awaits." He got up off the floor and looked down at his beautiful, sexually charged fiancée and sighed once more, only much deeper.

"I don't care about my public." Erin rolled her eyes and looked dejected. If they just had fifteen more minutes, she could have had him in her, had him pound her mercilessly. He could have filled her. But no, not now. {Damn it!}

"Yes you do. You live for them!" James laughed as he grabbed his somewhat satisfied cock and slid it back inside his slacks, "And as for me, I live for you, Erin." He reluctantly zipped up his pants and reattached his belt.

Erin stood there before him almost completely naked, save her tights and pointes. Her breasts, which had been pressed so tightly against her body in that damn suit, practically screamed to be caressed and loved. "Shit! I've been waiting so long!"

James laughed, "Long? You call a day long? Baby, there are people who go for months, nay, years even without having sex. I should amend that and add, sex with other people that is. Masturbation, while not the desired route for many, is the only path they know."

Erin laughed at him and pulled off the rest of her suit. "Nay? Amend? Who the hell says 'nay', James? And the masturbation thing...that's pretty insightful. Geeky, but insightful."

"Well, call me a geek if you must. I am an English professor, remember? We geeky profs love to use words that sound amazing but really don't mean much more than the shorter, less geeky words you know. Or did you forget that little fact about my career choice, baby?" He kissed her forehead as she started to undo her pointes.

"Yeah, yeah!" Oh, she knew exactly what he did for a living. After all, she'd been his student. She'd never forget how stunned she was when she walked into her Modern Literature class last year after missing the first two classes and saw Professor James Richmond standing at the front of the room.

He was an absolute dream. Dark hair, dark eyes and olive colored skin. And he was so tall and slender. She loved that, especially since she was fairly tall herself. And besides, Erin absolutely hated dating 'regular' college guys. They were always so immature.

However, when she saw James, her heart skipped about five beats. He was forty and she'd just turned twenty two. And her whole life was devoted to dancing; so, 'other' things sort of fell to the wayside. But Erin needed to pass this class and missing the first two sessions was not a good way to get an 'A'. She had to graduate or she wouldn't get her trust fund until she was twenty seven. Goddamn Great Aunt Lavinia!

In a fit of desperation, Erin decided to use the grace that God gave her to her advantage. She might not get an 'A' but she sure as hell was going to smile, wink and giggle her way to a 'C'. If she worked at it, maybe she could pull off a 'B'. And Professor Richmond definitely deserved a few smiles, winks and giggles.

On that first day, when she took a seat right in front of him, Erin knew that she had an effect on him because he tugged at his collar and cleared his throat every time he looked at her. Yes, she decided right then and there that she'd not miss anymore of this class.

And she didn't. Not one single class. In fact, she showed up early on many occasions. But it didn't really help. Erin was totally lost. And no amount of studying or reading was going to help her. She just couldn't get the whole concept of modern literature. She didn't really care who influence whom or whether or not they are 'valid' sources for current writers.

Sadly, no amount of flirting with the teacher seemed to really help, either (or so she thought). Oh, there were guys who had wanted to help her study, but that's not what they really wanted to 'help' her with. God, they were all so childish, too, with their stupid come-on lines.

But, as she sat there staring down at her test paper, she wanted to just offer herself up to Professor Richmond as a sacrificial lamb, maybe he'd show mercy and pass her that way. {Come on Erin, think. Think!}

James sat on the edge of his desk and watched two more students leave the room. "Miss Durant?" He looked down at her, waiting patiently for his last student to finish the test on Fitzgerald's influence on current trends in literature. He knew she was totally lost and he wanted to help her so badly. {God, James, just stop the poor girl} He spoke up again, "Miss Durant...Erin?"