Chapter 1 - 'dojo Do or Dojo Don't'

Like a bolt of lightning, pain shot through me. Accelerating from the tip of my nose towards the back of my head, slamming into my skull hard enough to make me forget who I am. For a second, my awareness consisted of nothing but the white expanse of pain and silence.

My awareness quickly escaped its paralysis, pulling back into my mind and body. I remembered exactly what had just happened, and felt a surge of pride race through me. My student, Sasha, had just hit me square in the nose and likely given me a nosebleed. Wait-had given me a nosebleed. I could feel the warm yet cool fullness slowly start to make its way down my nasal cavity, tickling my hairs along the way.

This was Sasha's first solid hit during our light sparring sessions. I had been teaching her self-defense for about 3 days a week over the past 3 weeks. This was our tenth class and she finally managed to land a solid hit on me. Of course, we were supposed to be doing "light contact" which means to touch the other person only hard enough to know the hit was successful. I have been going at 50% speed and mimicking the movements of the typical inexperienced assailant. The typical inebriated shmuck or the alleyway goon, out to get you with impure intentions.

I had aimed to grab her by the front of her tank top around her collar bone while bringing down a hammer fist from above. Sasha, out of instinct I assume, backed away during my grab so that my left hand landed squarely on her left breast which filled my larger than average hands till they made the shape you make when screwing in light bulbs...and that was while they clamped down. I have to touch myself, I mean get ahold of myself was what my brain told me as my fingers wrapped around her soft and pliable tit. Followed by the thought that whoever made pillows obviously never fondled a woman, because it was perfect against my hand.

As I tugged her towards me by her breast (I teach it's important to work through attack situations especially when the unexpected comes up during drills), she instinctively rushed forward past my hammer strike following my tugging and planted a punch upwards towards my frenulum.

I remember being so excited to see that the training was paying off. A smile pulled at the corner of my lips while I began to congratulate her,

"Well do-"

SMACK. My head snapped back.

I quickly pinched my nose and leaned forward, bringing my shirt up to staunch the bleeding, exposing my time-crafted six pack. Sasha, an apparently Russian descended girl with black hair that usually fell to just below her shoulders when it wasn't back in the ponytail she sported during practice, immediately ran over to me, her ponytail bobbing frantically.

"I'm SOOO sorry," Sasha pleaded "it was an accident!"

"Sasha," I reminded her, "we do not apologize for mistakes during practice, we get better, and that was no accident. You did exactly what we've been training you to do in a situation you've been trained to do it in." I explained.

"It was my own carelessness during our sparring that led me to...grab you indecently and you followed your training to a T. I'm so proud of you! Now could you go grab the first aid kit? I've got a date with two wads of gauze at the nostril cafe." I joked.

Despite the concern in her piercing blue eyes, they still rolled at my remark.

"This is serious Mr. Brooks, you're BLEEDING! Let me get you cleaned up, it's the least I could do."

"I told you, just call me Connor. It's important to remember that everyone is simply a person at the end of the day. We all bleed, case in point." I reminded her as I pointed at my bloody nose for extra effect.

"I swear your jokes will be the death of you." Sasha huffed as she brought over the first aid kit.

"So that's why you hit me! You're saying if I keep making jokes, you'll ground me...permanently." I said while putting my free hand up in mock fear.

"It's a good thing you're still sloppy on your groundwork! At least when it comes to fighting. " I teased, knowing she was still embarrassed about our last session.

The last time we had done groundwork, she kept overthinking what to do. I was on the bottom to start, and had turtled up (bringing my arms in close to my chest and under my chin while pulling my feet to my butt) in order to teach her how to work a resisting opponent. She had been straddling my stomach, trying to work on prying my arm off and to the side. In her frustration, she had switched tactics...and also where she was sitting.

She had spun around and pushed backwards until she sat squarely on my face. Her ass wasn't huge but you could bounce a dime off it and it created the perfect insulation around my face. I remember my nose pressing into her soft spot, the moistness on my skin refreshing as it mingled with the heat and sweat of practice.

The scent had been strong and musky, instantly fogging up my thoughts. It was the scent of an excited woman, mixed with the sweat of strong exertion. I forgot what we were doing and raised my hands to grab her thighs instinctively, feeling her soft body yield to my strong grip. She chose that moment to pounce and pinned my right arm to the ground.

"I got it! I got your arm!" she exclaimed excitedly, the vibrations of her bubbly voice reaching me through the bubble of her butt. Her moist cleft rocking against my nose and upper lip, a few drips were squeezed out of her damp spankies onto my helpless face.

I instantly recovered my bearings and swept her into a pinned position, reminding her to...use a more stable base of support next time. She blushed furiously as she realized what she'd done, especially after seeing me wipe my nose dry with the back of my hand. Thankfully I was wearing a cup that time, but I still feared she would see how strained my pants became around it from the pressure of my awoken cock beneath.

Never having really acknowledged out loud what happened, being reminded of it now only served to make her blush furiously again. Her hands shook slightly as she dabbed the blood up from my face. In her nervousness, she began to jam a cotton ball into my nostril.

"Woah! Careful, you gotta be more gentle when shoving something in another person. How would you like it if I did you that roughly?" I said, instantly realizing my mistake as the words left my mouth. She jumped in shock and moved her hand away from my nose, resting it on my stubble covered cheek.

I saw the previous blush deepen into a rosy red, blooming across her face and neck, outlining her tank top. She swallowed loudly and licked her lips, I couldn't see her eyes as she looked down...was she looking at my abs? Not possible, she just had to be too embarrassed to make eye contact.

"When you trust someone, you let them hurt you if it makes you both feel better in the end. Just like in practice, pain is something to be enjoyed because it's a sign you're growing closer to the self you want to be. Someone stronger and capable of things you never thought possible, but fantasized about secretly...right Mr. Brooks? That's what you taught me." Sasha whispered, her hand still holding me softly, her thumb absentmindedly trailing across my cheek.

She looked up at me with half-lidded eyes, her pupils large pools of darkness and desire, pulling me in. Pulling out of me the primal desires that were-

"YES, er, yes, that is correct." I said suddenly, aware that if I didn't snap myself out of it now there was no turning back. We were the only ones left in the studio I rent to teach self-defense in, everyone else had gone home early for the holidays.

Typically I teach from 4 PM to 7 PM with an extra hour somedays for the Advanced Class. However, even my advance students went home at 6 PM so they could eat Christmas Eve dinner with their families. I wasn't sure Christmas Eve dinner was even a 'special' time, but I let them go anyway wishing them all a Merry Christmas and to stay safe! They all cheered and said goodbye, promising to be careful even though we all knew half of them would be sloshed by tomorrow. My classes were for adults, after all. Though, most were 18 years old to their early twenties. Sasha likely one of the 18 year olds.

After seeing everyone out, I had begun to put the striking pads and practice weapons away when I felt a tap on my shoulder. I instantly grabbed the wrist and spun, preparing to handle whoever was behind me, when Sasha yelled

"Stop! It's me Mr. Brooks, it's Sasha!"

I immediately let go and made sure she was alright.

"You scared me Sasha, remember the rules? Always announce your presence to someone before approaching them from behind. We can't take chances." I scolded her gently.

"I'm sorry Mr. Brooks, I just wanted to ask if you had to go home, or if we could continue to practice?" Sasha said while looking up at me, a small pout on her lips while her ponytail bobbed hopefully behind her.

"Why, of course! I just thought everyone had gone home for the holidays. Are you not wanting to get home to your family?" I asked while halting my unpacking.

"It's...complicated Mr. Brooks. My family agrees that I should focus my time here on learning how to defend myself as quickly as I can." she said, with a smile that I knew worked against a weight of worry. Her eyes were closed as she said this, a telltale sign of a disconnect between expression and inner feelings. I decided I'd look more into this later.

"That's fine Sasha, I'm happy to continue practicing. I'm glad your family values you and supports your being here. A lot of students face ridicule at home or with friends about learning 'violence'." I said while putting on a set of MMA gloves and beginning to do light dynamic stretches, swinging my limbs gently through their ranges of motion.

"I'm also glad to have you here. You give great effort and passion when we're together, makes me want to give you my all as well, no matter how hard it is." I said while thrusting my hips to their full extension, feeling a deep stretch. I saw Sasha's eyes drift down me and settle at a spot between my-

"OH! I mean, what I'm saying is, even if there's some challenges along the way we can push through it together. We'll have you on top in no time. No, that doesn't...anyway, let's start some basic attack and defense drills, shall we?" I said sheepishly, knowing I was digging a hole the more I opened my mouth.

"....yes Mr. Brooks, thank you very much. Please don't bang me up too badly, I'll need to walk home after this." Sasha said, her eyes never leaving the increasingly hard spot between my legs.

Unlike last time, I hadn't brought my cup as today was focused on basic drills to keep the students from regressing over the break. Unfortunately, this meant that my progression was growing more evident by the minute, starting to form a clear 7-inch tent under my sweats. It didn't help that this full lipped vixen was watching, I knew things would get a lot harder if I didn't keep things moving.

"Well Sasha this will be a basic attack and defense drill, I'll try to grab you while throwing some strikes coming from above. Do your best to avoid and block me, feel free to throw in counters when appropriate." I instructed, hoping the stern and educational tone in my voice distracted her from my less than academic urges towards her.

Perhaps, it was also to distract myself...if I didn't know any better, I swear I could see the fabric of her tank top protruding from two points jetting proudly out her chest. Was she also feeling this draw towards the unthinkable? While I liked to be comfortable and friendly with my students, at the end of the day this was a job and I had to keep my professionalism. I was likely around her age if not a couple years older, but right now I was her instructor. That meant a level of trust and vulnerability that she was giving me, willingly putting her safety in my hands, which was not to be taken advantage of.

"I'm going to come now, are you ready?" I said, preparing my attackers stance.

"Yes, give me all you got Mr. Brooks!" Sasha said defiantly, raising her hands in preparation.

And that was the start of this ordeal, after awhile of basic exchanges I went for a grab and ended up coping a costly feel. But, if given the chance to go back, I wouldn't change a thing no matter how many times I paid that price.

I gently pulled Sasha's hand from my blood stained face, letting her hand drop from my grasp while I coughed nervously.

"I can take it from here, Sasha, uh, thank you." I managed with military intonation.

Sasha looked at me as if she had been the one who was injured, pulling her hand back and away. I saw her magnetic blue eyes grow moist with sadness, the tears threatening to spill over and follow the same path to the floor my blood had taken.

"Sasha, what's wrong?" I asked, concern coating my voice. I reached out a hand and she swatted it to the side.

"Mr. Brooks! Do you...do you not like me? I feel like we really connect sometimes and then all of a sudden you become cold and, and you treat me like I'M an assailant! And now I've hurt you and I feel horrible. It feels like the only way I'm able to touch you, is in a way that causes you pain." She let out, the anguish clear in her voice. Her eyes two wet pools of hurt and hunger.

I reached out my hands to comfort her and suddenly her hand shot out as fast as a snake striking its prey, grabbing my hand and bringing it swiftly to her chest. Smooshing my palm against her breast, her interwoven fingers forced me to grab her breast firmly and fully.

"See? This time I'm not trying to hit you, that was out of reflex before! I feel comfortable with you Mr. Brooks, I feel safe. Safe to open myself up and do things I wouldn't normally feel comfortable doing with anyone else. I want you to see me as just another person like you always say. Not as Sasha the student, but as Sasha the woman!" she cried, continuing to hold my hand to her breast while she pushed forward until our hands were trapped between us. I could feel those hard nubs from earlier attacking my bare chest and my senses.

I knew this was wrong, I knew I had to stop this and terminate the contract she had with me. But I also knew that that wasn't right to her, she had a right to learn how to protect herself and had done nothing wrong. I should have been more careful with my actions and...if I was being honest with myself, which I always am as part of the survival mentality I teach, I wanted to treat Sasha like the woman I was drawn to, the woman I saw her as. I hadn't controlled my urges, instead choosing to toe the line, and this was the result. But I was still going to try to talk her out of it, let it be her choice at least.

"Sasha, I will admit I do see you as a woman and...I have feelings for you that only a man can have for a woman. I apologize for the situation that has caused, but between the hours of 4 and 7, I am your instructor and you my student. Do you understand?" I said, putting my hand on her shoulder as I looked into her eyes with firm resolve. I prepared myself to handle the coming cries of protest.

She stared back unflinchingly with those sad blue pearls, a puzzled look on her pained face, when suddenly a smile broke through the tears.

"Yes, of course I do." She said as she sprang forward and kissed me. Her lips slipped around my own, my eyes open in surprise as her tongue darted out and began wrestling with mine. It was as if she were trying to tie my tongue into the classic cherry's knot. Her hands leveraged the back of my head so she could press her oh-so-suckable lips tighter against me, tasting my mouth like it was an oasis discovered while in the middle of the desert.

I blinked in confusion,

"Sasha, what..."

"Always be aware of your surroundings, that's what you taught me in our first class together Mr. Brooks. Like you said, you're my teacher from 4 to 7 but...the clock behind you says 7:04." Sasha proclaimed proudly, an impish smile painting her cheeks.

I was stunned! Even in that emotionally charged situation, she had kept her wits and her awareness. Finding the loopholes in my words while making the most of her surroundings. I smiled back at her, unable to help how impressed I was with my student, no, with Sasha.

"I was worried that this tension between us was keeping you from developing to your full potential, that's why I keep a strict teacher-student relationship. But despite all these...distractions, you've still been able to progress amazingly. How?" I asked skeptically, knowing my concentration slipped many times with Sasha, evident in my current nose injury.

"It's simple, my attraction to you keeps me so aware of everything you do and say that I can't NOT listen to you. I want to impress you Mr. Brooks, to show you how strong of a woman I can be. And I want you to guide me along the way." She said, lazily tracing my lips with the tip of her dainty yet firm pointer finger.

"I'm impressed Sasha. You know if I wasn't sure that you were telling the truth I would stop this right now in order to ensure your self-defense journey and thus your safety wasn't compromised. But I can read body language better than any book and I feel your honesty radiating off of you." I said, cupping my hand around her waist and pulling her tight against me.

"You are a beautiful and fierce woman, and the progress you have been making is clear to me today! But you know there's still one area we desperately need to work on." I said, a smirk stretching the corners of my mouth.

"It's time for the last lesson of the day Sasha and it's your favorite. Groundwork."