Can the Phoenix Rise

This is Fiction. This means it probably would never happen in the "real" world. It does here or else there would be no story.

This is the story of a marriage blown apart due to the pressure predators placed on the wife as well as other women at that firm. Her conflict affected their family life, left them on the precipice before they split. When the truth is finally revealed can they overcome the bitterness and anger. There was no adultery yet can they overcome this and rebuild better. There is some violence but a lot of loving.

Is it a RAAC, I don't think so by my definition.

It all started at a dinner party at my wife's colleague Nancy's home. There were twelve of us. Nancy and her husband Julian have a lovely house. All the couples had a good life. We were all professionals, in different areas, but our incomes were such we could afford a lot of life's luxuries. We all hosted parties roughly every second Saturday. The number of couples could vary from five to ten depending on what activities the children were attending.

My wife Samantha had returned to the workplace after our children had grown enough they could be left to fend for themselves safely for a short period after school. She was a graphic designer. We'd met at university as I was studying engineering. We shared a few classes as some elements of each course met. I'm Ben.

Over a few weeks we met at classes and spoke. She must have seen I enjoyed our little talks. As a result, she asked me to be her date to a party as she didn't like being set up by her friends. I agreed but blindsided her by asking her out on a proper date to compensate me for her friends. She was laughing as she agreed.

At the party I confirmed what I had already thought. She was highly intelligent, funny and had a zest for life. Okay she's pretty, in the girl next door style with a very good body. I loved how her eyes gave you a true insight to what she was thinking. I'm more a closed personality. I'm average I'd say. I do listen well and can be humorous but mostly, I'm shy unless I know you well. I'm fairly laidback. Sometimes that gets mistaken for being docile but I will stand my corner and fight back.

We dated for a while before I first experienced her breasts. They are the best I have ever experienced. She didn't like them as her nipples grew so much when she was aroused. I did though my eyes were caught quite a few times. Our sex life varied over the years. She was involved but reticent to explore more. It led to more than a few quarrels.

Fast forward twenty years and we're sitting around the dinner table after the meal. The drinks were flowing though I seldom drank. I stuck mostly to soft drinks. (My late dad had been an alcoholic as was his father. It had ruined my sister and I's early childhood. I never wanted that to happen to our three children. My step dad, "dad" is a wonderful man and grandfather.)

Over the course of the meal there was an underlying current that I couldn't fathom out. While on occasion there could be some discussion on sex it wasn't often and normally because something had been in the news. Tonight, there were a number of references to flirting at the office, about workplace romances and how some men undressed the women as they looked at them. How some men were pests.

I laughed as I nodded in agreement. They looked at me so I explained, "I had a bruised hand because one of my colleagues was harassing one of the women. He wouldn't take no for an answer. He never tried it again. There is no excuse for that behaviour by either sex."

Nancy was laughing as she said, "Sam, have you told Ben you have the hots for the new manager?"

I looked at Sam who was blushing. It takes a lot to make her blush. She'd never mentioned anything about a new manager let alone a hot one. I watched her carefully. Her body language was off when she spoke. She tried to laugh it off, "Nancy, you put all you fantasies onto the rest of us. He's okay, not hot."

Nancy was laughing, "Everyone heard you have an orgasm in the ladies after your meeting with him. He's clear he wants you so why not have a little fling."

Sam was beetroot. I was breathing hard, my anger levels cranking up more than a notch. I was aware the others were looking at me. My face must have shown my anger.

Julian whispered in Nancy's ear and she looked at me. "Ben, I'm only joking. We love winding her up as she can be so uptight."

I looked at her, my voice was angry, "Nancy, don't lie! You both planned on ambushing me with this. If this was to tell me she was fucking him or that she wants to fuck him, this wasn't how to do it. Let me say for the avoidance of any doubt. If Sam has already or does fuck this new manager or anyone else, we'll be divorced as soon as possible afterwards."

Sam looked shocked at my outburst. The others didn't know where to look. Nancy and Sam were looking at each other in a way which told everyone this had been set up. My reaction hadn't been what they expected.

Sam looked at me. I'd never seen that look in her eyes. They were cold, dark and gave off a foreboding of doom I'd never have dreamt she contained.

She controlled her voice but we all saw the effort. She was mad. "Ben, you don't own me. I can make my own choices. I can fuck who I like."

Nancy smiled. I saw it and glared at her, "Nancy have you told her to fuck this man? Do you fuck around on Julian?" That one got a response from her that Julian didn't like.

I glared at Sam, "Sam, I don't own you but you don't own me. If you fuck around, I'll deal with it in the way which suits me. You obviously have no consideration about how it would affect me. I would never show you such disrespect by raising this in a setting like this. All it's done is to show how little you care about me. I always consider your feelings yet as far as you're concerned mine don't count. How will the kids take to their mother being a whore?

"Have I ever fucking known you!"

I hadn't realised I was screaming as the room went quiet.

For the next five minutes Nancy and Sam tried to give reasons why I should be happy about Sam rediscovering her sex drive. It just drove up my anger levels to beyond nuclear!

I laughed, "I've tried for years to get her to be open to play, only ourselves. The lack of sex is due to her turning her back to me all the time. She's refused all my efforts to have counselling even seeing a sex therapist. Julian may be happy to have sloppy seconds but I'm not."

I looked scathingly at the others who had been quiet as we openly rowed, "If any of you knew about this and failed to tell me, don't think we can be friends moving forward."

"I doubt I have a marriage at all after tonight."

I stood up and walked out. I walked for miles before returning to what I had thought off as a happy home. Now, it was just a house. I had a rough plan. I needed to know. I wasn't going to be lied to or try and forget what had been said.

Sam wasn't home. I went to bed. I hoped I'd be asleep before or if she came home. Our discussions weren't over and I'm sure she knew that.

When I awoke she wasn't in bed. It was seven am so I got up. She wasn't on the couch. The kids were still sleeping. Probably played computer games with their pals half the night. I went to what I laughingly call my home office. It's what they termed the fifth bedroom. It wasn't big enough for a bed; at least a full size one. It was a slightly larger cupboard than normal. Eileen's room wasn't much bigger. I powered up my computer and set to work.

What are the divorce laws? In Scotland, it seems simple. I went through the various sections and made notes. Most were covered by irretrievable breakdown which includes adultery, separation for a year or gender change. Proof would be needed for adultery. As we had three children the court would need to approve the proposal for looking after them. No matter the cause of the breakdown, if all things agreed then it could be done within six months.

I looked at the various financial scenarios shown and noted those which would apply to me.

Our financial assets and debts. We both earned good salaries so had stocks and shares, savings accounts. We had a fund for our children's university education. The main debt was our mortgage. I'd need to have a valuation done. On a cursory look, Sam could afford the mortgage on her salary as we'd been paying more to rid ourselves of it. It would be on what basis we divided everything. Knowing her, I think I'll be co-mortgagee until the last child goes off to university in six years. In that case the house would be sold and we'd share the profit.

Once I had my spreadsheets done and saw what it would be like, I sat with another coffee wondering, what did I want? I had been so shaken by that ambush, I had just let rip. What did I want?

Did I still love Sam? I wasn't sure. I hadn't asked myself that question in years. I was the dutiful father, attending school plays, sports, driving them to after school activities. Sam was the same until relatively recently. Should I have taken more interest in that? We'd had more than a few discussions about her failure to attend the kids events. I realised we seldom spoke about ourselves, it was all about the kids.

As I reviewed everything, I saw the time we spent on us had been declining. She'd read for an hour in bed instead of playing with me for an hour. Our sex life had become very poor. She seldom bothered about my pleasure anymore. If it was once or twice a month, I'd probably be exaggerating.

Did I want to get back to those days we could discuss anything? Would she have told me about Mr Hot?

Would counselling help? I'd suggested it on occasion and her anger was such I feared suggesting it again but it seemed like we were at the last chance saloon.

It was now after ten am and she still hadn't appeared. Maybe she was fucking Mr Hot so she knew never to come home.

The kids were now up. They made their breakfasts like normal. Eileen, our youngest saw her mum wasn't home. She asked and I decided to tell them all the truth, a bland version. I didn't say their mum was a whore just we'd rowed very badly over something very important and she didn't like my response. She hadn't come home.

I was honest with them as Eileen asked, "Are you getting a divorce?"

I told them "I don't wish to but it may come to that. Hopefully, your mum will realise what she will lose and we can get help to be better together."

Eileen lost it and had to be consoled by her older sister Judith. Our son, Mark just looked astonished. His eyes were wet.

When they were all settled, I went back to my office to try and work out how I could find the evidence I needed. I was going to be proactive not reactive. If she did commit adultery I wanted to know and act as soon as she did. I checked her company's website. They had highlighted their senior staff. One I didn't know but even his photograph showed he thought himself superior to anyone. Simon Dewar, he was the new boss for Sam's department. I couldn't see what Sam would see in such a superficial arsehole.

I needed more information on him. How to collect that and how to know what Sam was up to? I researched home bugs and office bugs. I wasn't equipped for this. I needed professional help. I called a friend Mike, who was a former police officer who'd retired as he had terminal cancer. He and I grew up on the same street, played football together. I went to his home twice a week to annoy him. He loved I wasn't maudlin waiting for him to die, I tried to get his mind off it. He'd done the surveillance courses. Mike had joined Tayside Police originally posted to Arbroath but moved to Dundee where he worked both uniform and CID.

We'd kept in touch and frequently had met up as a foursome before his ex-wife Molly decided she couldn't take the strain of wondering if he'd come back through the door at the end of his shift anymore. He'd been badly hurt a few times. She found someone to keep her safe. It took him a long time before they could speak calmly. She did come round and helped tend to him. He liked to wind her up saying, "Are your blowjobs still as good? I can give you an answer if you want to try." To my knowledge she never did.

Mike pointed out the bugs to buy for the home and her handbag. He finished, "if she's going to a hotel with him or a function, you'll need help to get the evidence." He gave me a firm run by a former colleague Jennifer. I ordered what he said and had them delivered to his house.

I was just clearing away my lunch plates when Sam stormed into the house. I'd seldom seen her as angry. She launched her attack as she was yards away from me, "What the fuck! Why are you telling our kids that we're divorcing? You're a fucking moron!"

I smiled, though I wanted to wring her neck, "Good afternoon, dearest. Did you have a nice evening? Did you go and fuck that bastard, last night, this morning? Is your guilt preventing you from seeing that your kids saw you weren't at home. They asked and I explained, blandly, we'd fought. Eileen wanted to know if we would be getting a divorce and I said it was possible.

I added more firmly, the anger clear, "Just because you don't consider others, I do. It was better coming from me that we were in trouble than some of their friends saying we saw your mum with another man. Actions have consequences.

"Now you and I do need to speak, clearly so there is no ambiguity. From what you said last night, our marriage is seriously broken. The question is whether you or I have any reason to fix it. If you want a divorce say so. Don't fuck around until we do as if you do, I'll go nuclear. I'll give you the absolute minimum. I'll make sure his wife and all your colleagues know about you both.

"If you want to save our marriage, you'd better have a plan because the status quo isn't going to work either. I deserve far better than you've been treating me for months. The ball is in your court!"

Her fury was building at every word I said. As I finished she threw her bag at me before charging up the stairs to our bedroom. The door may need new hinges.

I heard the bedroom door open and Judith's voice, a timid husk of her normal tone, "Mum, are you alright?" I presume she went into the room. I went for a walk. It didn't settle my mind. I couldn't see what I wanted as I only felt the anger. I looked at the way my life was. Professionally, was it time to look ahead if we did divorce? I decided to look around and see what other opportunities there were. I'd moved to Dundee as she was from here. Did I want to return home? Move further afield? Decisions.

I returned in time for dinner. Sam was still in the bedroom. I couldn't be bothered making anything so I ordered in pizzas. It would annoy her but what the fuck! When they arrived, I shouted everyone.

Seems I was eating alone! After I'd eaten, I returned to my office. I called another friend from the pub quiz team. I told him what was happening. He gave me the name of a counsellor as I had to let go of my anger before I could see what I had and what I'd potentially lose. He'd gone through a divorce as his wife had discovered she was a lesbian after all. She thought she was bi. He still missed the threesomes with her and her partner.

I watched some television but I would be lying if I said I paid it any attention. I tidied up as it was time for bed. I put the uneaten pizzas into the freezer.

I went into the bedroom. Judith was holding her mum. Sam was holding Eileen. All had been crying. From their looks I was public enemy number one. I picked out my clothing and stuff I needed for work before going to the couch which was also a sofa bed. I was mad at my kids for seemingly picking sides. I wasn't going to put up with this level of anger in the house for long.

I was up and away early. I had decided on a course of action which could go both ways. I wanted a resolution, one way or another. At lunchtime, I was standing, in the shadows, near the entrance to Sam's work. I knew she and Nancy often lunched out and I expected after the last thirty-six hours they would need to talk. I wanted to try to find a place we could speak not scream at each other.

My intentions went out the window as arsehole and Sam came out together. I stormed up behind her, my words seemingly shocked her. "Is this the little arsehole you're fucking?" She was white when she turned to me. He turned, a supercilious grin on his face. Their co-workers were looking on with smiles at the spectacle in front of them.

I let rip at him, "If you fuck her, I'll remove your little dick and shove it up your arse. Your balls I will shove down your throat. I'll make sure your wife knows why. I'm sure she'll love to use a fucking strap-on on your new cunt! I hate those who prey on junior members of staff."

He wanted to punch me and I was all for it. He'd find out my muscles were toned by hard work not just lifting weights. He moved aside slowly. I turned to Sam but still had eyes on arsehole in case he tried anything. My glare showed him how much I wanted to beat the fuck out of him.

I just contained my voice though my anger was clear, ""Sam, you're using up all the goodwill you had made over all the years we've spent together. I warned you, I will not be a party to you fucking around. If he's using his position to intimidate you into fucking him, we'll take him down and feed him to the sharks. If you want to dump me, then tell me. We can divorce before you fuck little dickhead. If you do before we're divorced, I'll go scorched earth on all of you.

"You'll throw away our future for a pathetic fuck."

Someone must have called the security as two approached me. I shouted at them, "This is a public street. Touch me and I'll show him what he'll get if he continues to try and fuck my wife!" They backed off. The others around were astounded at my level of anger. I took one forcible step towards him and he ran into the building. There appeared to be a large wet patch spreading on his trousers.

I turned to Sam, "It's time to make your mind up Sam. Your marriage or him?" I walked away. My anger evident to all. As I did I saw a colleague of hers, Susanna hold her hand to her ear showing "call me!" She and her husband were also part of our group though hadn't been at that party. I nodded.

Once back to my office, I called her. She texted me his name and address. He was married. I was late home as I staked out his house to confirm it was his. It was.

I would like to say my homecoming was greeted by tears, apologies and promises that she'd make it all up to me. I'd be lying. Just walking into the house felt like entering a freezer.

Judith spoke firmly, "What did you do? Mum's beside herself. She's been crying all afternoon. She was here when we came home from school. She doesn't like you at all."

I looked at her. She was worried where this was heading. I couldn't sugar coat it, "Judith, your mum with Nancy's help decided she wanted to fuck her new boss, a supercilious cunt. They ambushed me on Saturday night at the dinner party. When I wouldn't agree to allowing your mum to fuck around, it all went downhill. Your mum was screaming at me, "it's her body she decides who fucks her."

"I agree but she wouldn't accept that if she did it would have impacts on me, on all of you. Her attitude is wrong on so many levels.

"Before we were married, your mum and I talked about things that could happen. One thing we did agree on was that adultery was wrong. Your mother has changed her mind. I haven't.

"Let's take you, in a few years, you may have someone you love and he starts to play around. It's just sex. He loves you. You put up with it because you love him. How do you feel when you have to go to the STD clinic as he's given you a disease? Is he showing you any love? Is he considering your feelings? How soon does your love become hate? Hate for him and hate for yourself putting up with him, hoping he'll change. He has no reason to.