It’s Friday night, and she’s getting out of the taxi. She’s very tired, and longs for a hot bath and her bed. The bath will have to wait. She can’t pour a tub in the middle of the night, the neighbors will complain if she wakes them up. She’s gonna straight to bed. Someone’s using the elevator. Oh, good, here it comes! She checks her reflection in the mirror as she’s going up, and makes a face. She’s tired, and she looks tired. Who knew office parties were so tiring? A lot of people getting drunk and shedding their inhibitions, doing and saying things they’ll regret on Monday morning. Maybe she’ll put on a mud mask tomorrow… The elevator doors open, and she stares at the scene in the hallway. A woman is standing on her hands and knees outside Sam’s door, scooping up things from the floor and putting them in a small, red purse. She stands up, sees Ellenor in the elevator, and her chin drops. Ellenor’s brain doesn’t want to work, it’s tired, she’s tired, she wants to go to sleep in her comfortable bed with the featherfilled bedthrows – but this annoying little voice at the back of her head is listing all the evidence; the strange woman’s cheekbones, her eyes, her adam’s apple…
“Sam?”
Ellenor steps out of the elevator.
“Hello, Ellenor.”
His voice is tense; his body’s stiff, as if he expects her to hit him.
“Wow,” she says, eyeing him. “You look good!”
“Thanks.
He’s still not sure of her reaction, she can tell.
“How about a cup of tea?” she suggests. “My place?”
“That would be nice.”
He walks with her into her apartment. Ellenor kicks off her shoes.
“What a relief!” she says. “One more minute in these and I would have had to amputate my feet!”
“Mind if I take off mine?” says Sam, and puts his red purse on the little table in her hall.
“Sure, make yourself comfortable,” she says, and walks into the kitchen.
Sam sits down at the kitchen table, is unusually quiet while she tells him about her night. Ellenor fixes tea for them. Not until they’re sitting there with their cups, does he speak.
“My name’s Samantha.”
Ellenor fidgets with her hair.
“I had no idea you liked this,” she says.
“It’s not a hobby,” says Sam. “It’s a way of life.”
“What’s the attraction?” she asks. “I mean, why do you do it?”
“I like to look pretty,” he says. “I go out with friends, we go to clubs… I want to be beautiful. I want men to look at me and think that I’m a princess! I want to feel good about myself!”
“Just like I do,” Ellenor says.
Sam nods.
“Yes,” he says. “You dress up to feel sexy, to look incredibly hot, to turn a few heads… upstairs and downstairs.”
“But why as a woman?” she asks. “You’re gorgeous as a man. Why do you want to look like a gorgeous WOMAN?”
“I like it,” he explains. “All of it. The preparations. Lotion, silk, perfume, make-up… I love it. It makes me feel beautiful, in a way that dressing up as a man doesn’t. I feel… sensual.”
Ellenor bites her lip.
“Why have you never told me about this?” she says. “We’ve been friends for 5 years, but I had no idea that you… liked this.”
“I wasn’t sure how you would react,” Sam says. “It’s happened to me before that friends have drawn away from me when they find out.”
“I’m not like that!”
Ellenor gets out of her chair, runs around the table, and hugs him.
“You’re my best friend,” she says. “What do I care if you wear pants or skirts?”
He hugs her back, hard. She sits down again, and gets herself a refill of her cup.
“I don’t know anything about this,” she says. “Do you and your friends go to, like… special clubs?”
“Sometimes,” he says. “If you want, you can come along next time and check it out.”
Yet another Friday night. Her life seems to revolve around these nights alone. Tonight, she’s accompanied Sam to his favorite club, QUIRK. She’s still not used to seeing him in drag, but she likes Samantha, she’s like a new great friend, a friend that has shared a secret with Ellenor, just like little girls do to prove that they’re indeed best friends. Apart from the dress and the hair and the make-up, it’s still Sam, though. She finds herself thinking, over and over again, “I gotta tell Sam that she said that”, and then she remembers. It’s strange. But she likes it. She likes to go out with Sam, no, Samantha! She likes it that guys are staring after them, the two pretty girls in their sexy dresses. She likes the comfort of having a girlfriend to talk to, especially a girlfriend who’s big and strong. OK, Sam’s no beef, but he’s still stronger than she is, thanks to all the workout, and that makes her feel good. They get out of the taxi in front of QUIRK, and Samantha waves at old friends while she escorts Ellenor into the club and up to the bar.
“That’s Ted, he’s an asshole, there’s Lisa and Jennifer, they got married in Denmark last year and are trying to have a baby with Fred and Ali over there. Over in the corner you have Danielle, oh my god, he’s finally got the breast implants done, good for him, he’s been waiting for that for years, oh, dear, here comes Ruby and Jake…”
Ruby’s a very tall, black, model-esque woman, or so Ellenor thinks, until Ruby opens her mouth and speaks with a deep, deep bass.
“Samantha, DARLING! It’s so good to see you!”
