After dinner we all sat in the living room having what my mother liked to call cocktails. Really it was wine, beer and for my father, vodka and tonic. We were situated around the room comfortably, my mom and dad on the loveseat, my brother Brian, Diane and then Josh on the couch. Josh’s wife, Emily, was sitting in the overstuffed leather chair (on account of her bulging stomach) and Johanna and I were sitting on the floor against the fireplace, directly across from the sofa. Everyone seemed to be talking to each other and carrying on their own conversations. Josh looked at me.
“So,” he said. “How have you been?”
“Okay for the most part.” I smiled. “I see you’ve been busy.” I said nodding to Emily.
He smiled sheepishly. “Yeah, well, things happen.”
“So it seems.” I paused. “When did you get married?”
“Four months ago. It was a small ceremony, just our parents.”
I thought about this for a moment and then looked over at Emily. Well, I thought, she is more than 4 months pregnant. I looked back at Josh and he nodded his head.
“Yeah, it was a pre-honeymoon baby. Kinda happened I guess.”
“Uh-huh.” I looked down at my chipping nail polish and tried not to be hurt. Inside I was fuming, although I had no right to be, I mean after all I wasn’t here, but it still stung to see my first love married to someone else and her pregnant with his child. I sighed.
“Well, I am going to the kitchen to refill.” I said waving my glass. “Does anyone want anything?”
No one seemed interested so I stood and stepped over Johanna’s legs to walk to the kitchen. I saw out of the corner of my eye Josh getting up to follow me, but before he made it to the door, Emily grabbed his arm.
“Grab me a glass of juice would you?” She asked of him sweetly. He took her glass and nodded. She smiled and returned her attention to Jo, telling her of her baby name choices. I wanted to gag.
I made it to the refrigerator and opened it to retrieve the bottle of wine stashed in the door and I felt hands around my waist and a breath on my neck.
“God, I’ve missed you Angel.” Josh said into my hair. I stood still for a moment, deciding what to do. “I’ve missed you so much. You have no idea what it is like here without you.”
“Sure. And I guess Emily just happened to keep you company while pinning away for me huh?” I said sarcastically.
“Angel, it was a mistake. She said she was on Birth Control. How was I supposed to know?”
“Duh. Wear a fucking condom.” I snapped back, stepping away from him and closing the door to the fridge.
“I know. I know! It was stupid. I was stupid. But this happened and my mother and especially her father wanted us to get married for the sake of the baby. I didn’t want to do it. Honest.”
He stepped so he was in front of me, a hand on either side of my body, leaning on the counter. I held my glass with my left hand with my right crossed across my middle.
“Let me go.” I said
“Listen Angel, I need you.”
”What you need to do is let me go before your wife walks in here.”
“She won’t. Plus, I want to spend some time with you.”
I sighed. This was going nowhere. I had two choices: put him off or listen to what he had to say. I figured that he was going to say what he wanted anyway, so I might as well go with it.
“You never wanted to spend time with me before. I mean, all I was to you was a good fuck when you didn’t have a girlfriend and sometimes even when you did. I liked you Josh. I think I loved you at one point, but I am done now. Done. I have moved on, have my own life and you have yours. Don’t do this to me, or to you.”
“You don’t know what its like. She’s a bitch. We never fuck anymore. She sits on her ass while I work for her goddamn father. She complains and bitches about everything. When we do have sex, she’s like a fucking fish. Just lies there. I need you. I need to feel you again.” He nuzzled my ear and whispered, “I need to cum with you Angel. Just like old times.”
I leaned my head to the side and closed my eyes. God that felt good. Josh always had an effect on me, and he knew how to use his power on me. I moaned softly. “Yes.”
“Yes, Angel. You know you want me. Just like I want you. Need you.” He stressed the words. “I need to feel you.”
“Yes.” I said again, my body betraying me.
“Okay. Tonight, meet me at the old barn up the hill. You know the one. With the loft.”
“That old thing is still there?”
“Yes, Meet me there at 11. Don’t tell anyone you are meeting me. Just be there.” He kissed my mouth hard, darting his tongue into my mouth swiftly. “Please be there.”
“What about her?” I asked, nodding towards the living room.
“She’s asleep by 9 for sure. I’ll stay up doing some work I brought from the office. I do it all the time. She won’t have a clue.”
I bit my lip for a second and then took a swig from my glass. I sighed. “Fine.” I said, “I’ll be there.”
Josh’s eyes lit up. “You won’t regret it, I promise.”
He turned back to the fridge and I walked to the living room, reclaiming my seat next to Johanna. I never regretted being with Josh and some small part of me wanted to be with him again.
Before it got to late, Diane Hart left with a promise to stop by tomorrow to take me and Johanna shopping for some ‘real’ clothes. Obviously our city clothes weren’t to hip in our small town in PA. Moments later Josh and Emily rose and headed for the door as well.
“It was so nice to meet you finally,” Emily said to me after she gave me a hug good-bye. “I have heard so much about you. Angel this and Angel that. Its nice to put a face with a personality.”
I smiled, not sure of what to say. “Same here.” I said, because that was the first thing to pop into my head. She walked out the door ahead of Josh and when he hugged me goodnight he whispered again, “Be there.”
