JAKE's DESIRE: Chapter 2
ALONE WITH HER THOUGHTS
Standing at their upstairs bedroom window, Ann watched her partner walk down the sidewalk with that unmistakable spring in his step. She'd seen it on other occasions and knew exactly what it meant. Jake was under the spell of another woman, and she had a good idea who it might be.
Word travels fast through the couple's tightly bonded neighborhood. So, when the news of Mrs. Clayton's granddaughter's summer stay first caught Ann's attention, there was little doubt that it meant trouble.
She was far from oblivious to the problems in her relationship with Jake. It's just that she couldn't see her way clear to try to fix the situation. It was a multi-faceted problem that required a lot of unpealing.
Relationships with men had never been easy for Ann. From the early childhood memories of an older cousin who "played doctor" a little too intimately, through a series of bad dating experiences, to life with an abusive first husband; she had experienced far too much of men's "bad side" and next to none of the good.
Jake was the lone bright spot. He tried to make her happy. She believed that he'd always loved her, but she also knew his sexual appetite wasn't being satisfied with her feeble attempts. He'd been patient and taught her a lot of things he liked sexually.
It's just that every time she tried to please him by doing favors for him in bed, those old dark memories of too many bad experiences came rushing back. At those times, she could sense Jake's frustration over her inability to be free and easy in casting her inhibitions aside.
Lately, sex was a rarity. When it did happen, Jake seemed more and more detached, as if he were thinking of something - or someone - else. She was walking a dangerous tightrope with their relationship - she could see herself soon losing.
She just wasn't able to initiate intimacy. Whenever she tried to convince herself it would be all right, maybe even enjoyable, visions of her cousin's surprise ejaculation in her mouth came to her mind, even as she began caressing Jake's erect penis. She was afraid it would happen again as it did in her uncle's garage all those years ago.
Date rape wasn't the term for it in her teens. But memories of her clothes being torn from her body in the backseat of some boy's car remain fresh in her mind. The pain was inflicted by his thrusting without making any effort to ensure she was wet enough to accept him inside her. Jake wasn't like that, as he always takes his time to make sure she's ready. If she could only stop herself from tensing up.
