Wednesday morning my phone rang at my bedside. It was Kim, Dr. Kim Geiler-Callaghan, my research partner and mentor. The clock read 8:38 a.m.
"Good morning, Sunshine," she said far too cheerily.
"Mnng Km," I mumbled. Hey, at least I recognized her voice.
"Ah, I've obviously awakened you," she said observantly while stifling a chuckle.
"It's time I got up anyway," I said a bit more coherently. "What's going on with you?"
"I called and talked with Jamie last night. I had a couple thoughts about the prosthetic phallus. I also asked her what she had in mind when she offered us the guided tour of her lab."
"So, what did she say?" I asked.
"Well, she knew that would get our undivided attention while still sounding perfectly normal and professionally acceptable to the others at your thesis presentation.
Actually, she would like to talk with both of us soon, today if possible. Since you're finished with classes, I wondered if you would be free sometime today to meet."
"I've got an appointment this afternoon," I said, "So it would have to be this morning if it's going to be today. I'm open all day tomorrow and Friday, though."
"I can do 10:30 today," Kim said. "Let me call Jamie back and see if that works for her."
Five minutes later Kim called again.
"Meet me at 10:25 in the reception area of Jamie's lab."
I rolled out of bed, fixed some breakfast, and got dressed. On the way to Jamie's lab, I dropped off my one and only business suit at the dry cleaners. Monday afternoon with Kim had definitely taken its toll on my suit.
When I walked into the reception room of Devlin Laboratories at 10:25, Kim had just arrived. Barely a minute later, Jamie came to get us and take us back to her private office.
"First of all, Tom, I apologize for catching you off guard on Monday showing up for your thesis presentation. Judging from the comments of your committee members and the guests, they were blown away by your thesis and the discussion of it. They're really impressed with the planning you both have done for your joint research. I was, too, but knowing you both as well as I do, I wasn't surprised.
Which brings me to why I'm glad the three of us could talk privately today.
Tom, while you're working on your PhD dissertation, I'd like to offer you a job as a consultant here at my lab.
After reading your thesis and having to do a lot of research into nanotech in hopes of catching up with you, I better understand that the nanotech interface between the human living body and the mechanical world is going to exert greater influence on prosthetics design and function for the foreseeable future.
What I'm proposing is that for some amount of time every week, you'll assess the lab's operations and design with the idea of identifying where we need to not just catch up but lead in the application of nanotech to prosthetic design and application.
In addition to compensation for your time and knowledge, you'll be getting some practical work experience in a functioning lab. And beyond that, you and Kim will have access to the lab's facilities when you need 'hardware' and a place to conduct your research and experimentation."
I started to speak, but Jamie held up her hand to stop me.
"Tom, I don't expect or even want you to answer today.
Obviously what I'm proposing would be beneficial for Devlin Labs and for the University, both the double-E and medical programs. However, there are some ethical and intellectual property issues that play a huge role in determining if and how we can properly do this.
This is a fairly complicated proposal, so what I would like to do is set up a meeting among the three of us with Drs. Keller and Klein. As a starting point rather than anything close to a negotiation of details, I'd simply like to have an informal talk among all of us to see if and how this can be done ethically and lawfully. Your personal and professional reputations, my lab's reputation and continuing eligibility to bid on government contracts, and the university's reputation for the highest integrity in research and medical development are too important to put at risk."
Kim and I talked with Jamie for a few more minutes, then concluded that we should all talk as Jamie had suggested. Overall, Kim and I were generally enthusiastic.
Kim headed back to the hospital, and I drove back to my apartment. When I arrived, it was past the time the mail is usually delivered, so I checked my box. The usual junk mail was on top of one of the package box keys. I retrieved the package and took it inside my apartment. The junk mail made it only as far as the green recycle barrel next to the mailboxes.
The package was my order from the condom company Kerri Kavanaugh had recommended. I opened it to quickly check and make sure I had received everything ordered and paid for on my credit card. Everything was there exactly as ordered, but there were some extra condoms with different numbers than the ones I had ordered. There was also a letter of transmittal.
"Dear Mr. Connors:" the letter began. "Thank you for your order.
Your first-time order was completed with condoms selected based on measurements you provided. Because the measuring process can be a bit tricky and because we want your complete satisfaction with our product, first-time customers also receive extra condoms that are one size larger and smaller in both length and girth. Of course, there is no charge for the extras.
Before you place your next order, please try the additional condoms we've included just to ensure that the ones you order will fit you perfectly. We also urge you to check your measurements al least twice yearly to ensure proper fit and your continued satisfaction.
If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to call me or a member of my staff.