"All extremes of feeling are allied with madness."
-Virginia Woolf, "Orlando"
***
It was sundown. The carriage reached the cottage on the cliffs. Porphyria followed the path to the door, but hesitated before knocking. Maybe I should go back, she thought. Maybe I should just throw myself off the cliffs instead. That would be better.
But she knocked, and when the door opened she went in without waiting to be invited or greeted. She had to duck a bit to fit through the doorframe. She was a great, tall woman, with strong arms and broad shoulders and a hard face, but she was often called beautiful.
(A duke wrote a sonnet about her hair two seasons ago. She called the verses "quaint.")
Hester was wiping flourβcovered fingers on her apron. She was small and fine, and anyone would admit she was pretty, but gentlemen of every stripe stayed away from her, and no one would have dared write her poetry. She said nothing to Porphyria, but instead went back to the kitchen and continued rolling out dough on the sideboard. Porphyria waited as long as her patience would bear and then coughed. Hester looked at her.
"Well?" she said. "What do you want?"
Porphyria set a box on the countertop. Hester smeared flour on it as she picked it up. Inside was a diamond necklace. "How...pretty," Hester said.
"My mother wore it at Queen Victoria's coronation. Just one of those stones would buy all the land from here to Marblehead Hall. It should be more than enough."
Hester turned the necklace over in her hand. "I'm sorry," she said. "But I wouldn't have a thing to wear with it."
Porphyria scowled. "If that's not good enough then what is?"
"You know my price," said Hester, continuing to knead the dough.
"I won't pay it."
"Then you won't. It's your decision. But no one else can help you. You've traveled all over the isles and even to the continent, but no one who can do what I can."
"How do you know that?"
"I know," said Hester.
Porphyria seethed. Hester separated the dough into pans, singing under her breath.
"If I agree," said Porphyria, "do you promise to give me what I want?"
"You know I will," said Hester, without looking up.
Porphyria went to the window. She felt ill. Her eyes burned, but she refused to cry.
"Fine then," she said.
Hester stood up straight. "We have a deal?"
Porphyria bit her lip. "Yes."
Hester picked the necklace up. "I'll keep the jewels too, if you don't mind?"
"Not a bit."
Hester hung up her apron. She washed her hands in the rain barrel and took her hair down one layer of brown curls at a time. Then he took Porphyria by the hand and led her into the little bedroom.
She turned her back as Porphyria undressed, but after several minutes it was clear that Porphyria was having trouble with her layers of undergarments. Hester bit her lip to keep from laughing. This went on for some time. Finally she said, "Let me help you."
"I don't need help."
"Plainly you do."
Porphyria made a noise very much like a growl but kept still long enough for Hester to undo everything. Then Hester stripped her down to her chemise and Porphyria sat on the edge of the thin mattress, hands knotted in her lap. Hester undressed by herself, and then both women stared at one another, seemingly unsure how to make the first move.
Finally, Hester leaned in and kissed Porphyria on the lips. Porphyria nearly fell off the bed. Hester kissed her again, with a bit more force. Porphyria's body went rigid. It was like kissing an anvil. Hester sighed.
"This isn't going to work," she said.
"Wait!" said Porphyria.
"No," said Hester, reaching for her dress. "It won't work. You don't love me."
"Did you expect me to?"
"No, but I expected you to be a little more convincing." Hester looked out the window. "Do you remember when my mother stood at this window and watched us play down on the rocks?"
Porphyria blinked. "Yes. I suppose. We were there almost every day."
"Do you remember when your father took you away and made you promise not to come back, telling you that you should never associate with our kind? That day in particular?"
"Yes," said Porphyria.
"I loved you even then. I think about that day every time I look out this window. Do you know what it was like for me when you married that man and went to live at Marblehead Hall and left me thinking I would never see you again?
"I could have had you for myself if I'd wanted. I could have forced you to believe that you love me. I have that power. But I didn't. And you can't even do this one thing for me, not even when you need my help. I gave up a life, and you won't give me a night."
"Give me a chance!" said Porphyria. "I have never...done...this before. It's not easy. But I'm willing if you just help me."
Hester had never heard this tone in Porphyria's voice before. It almost sounded like pleading. Hester drummed her fingers on the windowsill, thinking.
"Maybe I should make it easier for you?" Hester said. She went to a shelf and took down a round box, then drew a pinch of something that looked like crushed flower petals from it. "Taste it," she said. "Just a little."
Porphyria came no closer. "What is it?"
"Something to make you forget for a while." She held her hand higher.
"I don't need witchcraft."
"If that were true you wouldn't be here."
Hester touched the substance to Porphyria's lips and Porphyria felt lighter. She sighed and then swooned, closing her eyes as she fell onto the bed. She was not sure where she was all of a sudden, but she felt too good to care.
Someone touched her bare arm. It felt very good. Someone else was in the bed with her, she realized. Porphyria didn't recognize the woman, but the touch of her hand was soft, and warm, and sensual.