The Sweetest Deception

-4-

Jade

After rushing Roman out the door, I collapse onto my bed, trying to soothe the burning in my lungs and keep my dinner down. What the actual fuck. I'm literally going to die from embarrassment. I feel the tears stinging the backs of my eyes and my throat starts to burn as I bring my hands up to my head, wrapping my fingers in my hair. You've got to be kidding me.

I finally get the balls to send my manuscript off to an editor and that editor just happens to me the maintenance guy for my new apartment?! I also just so happen to break the faucet in some freak accident and he shows up here in the middle of the night to save me, and ends up seeing my sex toys sprawled out across the bed?! This can't be my real life. I pinch myself on the arm lightly, just to double check that I'm not currently having a nightmare. Unfortunately, it confirms that I'm awake and this is very much so my real life.

Fuck.

Opening my laptop, I pull up my emails and find his response to the manuscript. I hadn't even seen it yet since everything went insane right after I sent it the other day.

Roman,

Holy fuck. I am so incredibly sorry for everything that happened this evening. I hadn't gotten a chance to read your email yet. My life kind of fell apart right after I got the guts to send you the manuscript.

Anyway, I'm sure that meeting is off the table now. Plus, I'm absolutely mortified at what happened here. So, I just wanted to apologize to you once again.

Thank you for taking the time to read the manuscript, though. I really do appreciate that.

-Jade

I hit send before my heart has the chance to explode. On an exasperated sigh, I shut the laptop and let the first tears spill over. Once that happens, there's no chance of redemption. The wave has finally landed and I collapse in on myself, curling into a tight ball on the bed, sobbing until there's nothing left for me to give.

***

27 texts.

18 missed calls.

12 new voicemails.

As I rub the sleep from my eyes with the backs of my hands, my mind struggles to focus on the screen. Nobody even has this number.

Opening the phone, I see that the calls and texts are from a familiar number. Dawson. How the fuck did he get this number? I literally just got the phone and didn't give the number out to anyone yet, other than here for the apartment. I've just been using it for Facebook and a bit of YouTube at this point. The distance has kept me slightly sane.

Clicking on the messages, I notice they get more desperate as time goes on. Especially once he sent a few and didn't get any response from me at all.

Jade, I need you to call me back.

This is important.

Jade, please! Call me back right now!

Fuck, Jade. Just answer the damn phone already! I really have to talk to you!

They continue in a similar style, the last one coming in just about an hour ago. I don't even bother to check the voicemails before I type out a quick response.

What do you need?

Before I can even lock the screen, Dawson's number is flashing on my phone.

"What?" I answer, trying to keep the venom from my tone.

"Emily is dead," he states, not even bothering to lead into it gently. The silence stretches as I try to begin to process what he just said. Everything just feels blank though, like nothing is even real right now.

"What?" I repeat, barely above a whisper. When he doesn't respond for a few seconds, I wonder if I said that out loud at all. "I'll be at the house as quick as I can," I say, ending the call before he gets a chance to answer.

Ten minutes later, I'm pulling up outside his house. Our old house. Shaking my head to clear the thoughts, I open the car door and make my way to the house. I do my best to brace myself, not sure what to expect.

My hand touches the knob but the door is flung open, revealing Dawson on the other side. "Thank god you're here. I'm freaking out and I don't have a clue what to do," he rushes, pulling me in for a quick hug, squeezing the air from my lungs.

I push back against him, freeing myself. "Slow down. What the fuck happened? What do you mean Emily is dead? Where is she? What are the police saying? Holy hell," I word vomit, trying to keep my head from spinning. Feeling dizzy, I lean against the doorframe for some support. I'm barely remaining upright at this point.

"They're not really saying anything. That's the problem! They won't talk to me at all! They asked a bunch of questions and then basically ghosted me," he shouts, rage boiling to the surface now.

"Start from the beginning. Go slow," I instruct, hoping to find some answers. Or at least get some clarity on what's happened since I've been MIA the last few days.

"God, I really don't know, Jade," he rushes, nearly tripping over his words. It's a rare thing to see Dawson so worked up. The whole situation has me feeling like my nerve endings are all on fire.

With a deep, steadying breath, he pushes himself to continue. "Emily had been staying here the last couple nights since you've been gone. We were both worried sick about you and hoping you would call or come home. We spent hours trying to figure out a way to find you and get everything figured out. She didn't sleep hardly at all." There are tears in his eyes, rimming them red now. I fight the urge to roll my eyes so he will keep going.

"I must have fallen asleep at some point. I woke up to this insane pounding on the door. It scared the fuck out of me. I hopped up off the couch and ran to the door, praying it was you," he pauses, giving me a second to respond. When I don't, he starts again. "It was the police. They asked if I knew Em. I told them I did, so they asked to come in. That's when they told me something terrible had happened. They had found Em dead."

"Where did they find her?" I ask, urging him on. I need all the details if I'm going to have any chance at getting a shred of closure on this. I need to know who did it.

"A couple hikers called it in. The couple had noticed some broken branches or something. The area just seemed off, they said. When they looked a little farther, they saw a bunch of blood and then Emily's body a little farther away. She was a little way off that tiny trail that goes to the overlook. Not the popular one. The hidden one that looks out over the prettiest part of the river," he divulges. It's like once he started talking, he couldn't stop until it was all out or he would never be able to finish telling me.

I stop in my tracks. She didn't even know about that spot. We were friends for over a decade and that spot was never mentioned. That was my spot. I swallow, trying with all my might to keep the contents of my stomach in their rightful place. My head is swimming and I can't breathe anymore.

It had to have been someone local. None of the tourists would know about that place. It's not on any map and not many of the local people even know about it. That's what has always made it so incredible over the years. Hell, from the way the trail is grown up, it looks like nobody ever goes up there anymore at all. And now my best friend was found dead there. Murdered.

I slide along the doorframe down to the floor, no longer trusting my legs to hold me upright. Hugging my knees, I lay my cheek on them, trying to focus on breathing. My entire world is crumbling around me and I can't do anything to stop it.

"Do they have any suspects yet?" I ask, more to fill the silence than anything.

"If they do, they didn't tell me that. They were just asking general information about her. Where she lived, where she had been in the days leading up to this, her social habits," he shrugs.

"I can't think of anyone who would have wanted to hurt her. Maybe it was just a weird freak thing," I suggest, knowing in my gut that isn't right. It just doesn't sit right from the second it leaves my tongue.

"Yeah, maybe," he agrees, not sounding confident in that answer either. "I'm sure the police will get it figured out. Murders don't happen here, so they've got all hands on deck, I'm sure."

"Let me know if you hear anything. I need some space," I reply, standing and dusting off the seat of my pants. "I can't be here right now. Everything is way too overwhelming." With that, I step out the door.

I slide into the driver's seat, not having a clue where to go or what to do from here. My brain is completely empty and overflowing at the same time. It's an odd sense of drowning and watching myself drown at the same time.

Before I realize it, I'm putting my car into park and climbing out at the gym. I need some space to clear my head, and this is the best place I know of for that. Putting my earbuds in place, I hit shuffle on my playlist, letting my mind run wild.

About twenty minutes into my run on the treadmill, I'm pouring sweat and starting to lose the fire that's kept me going so far. Determined to push farther, I glance up and see Roman across the gym, watching me. With an eyeroll, and a slight falter to my pace, I refocus on the run, willing myself to ignore him. That's the last fucking thing I need today.

Ten minutes later, I'm shutting down the treadmill, swiping a towel across my sweaty forehead. I'm heading for the free weights when he steps into my path, stopping me short.

"Jade," he starts with a sly smile. "Fancy seeing you here."

"I'm really not in the mood, Roman," I spit, pushing past him. Swiping at my eye, I don't even bother to stop at the weights. Instead, I head out to the parking lot.

"Hey, what the hell?" he half yells, following me out the door. "I wasn't trying to be pushy or rude! Are you okay?" There's concern in his voice, but I'm not sure if it's for me or because he thinks he overstepped a line.

My short stride is no match for his long legs and he catches up in a few seconds, wrapping his hand around my upper arm and spinning me to face him. With tears streaming down my face, I face down the man who has already seen my most embarrassing moments. How much worse could it possibly get?

"Jade? What the fuck is going on?" he pries, voice barely above a whisper. There's an edge of concern and maybe a little pain in his tone. There's also an underlying fury that feels like it could strike a match and watch the world go up in flames, but I'm doing my best to ignore that part.

"Obviously we don't know each other well at all, but I get the feeling there isn't much that makes you cry or sends you into this kind of a frenzy. What's going on?" he repeats, rubbing my arm with his thumb gently now. I don't pull away, although all the alarm bells in my head are blaring.

I do my best to stifle the psychotic laugh that is trying to bubble its way up and out of my chest. Instead, I just put on my sweetest smile and dive right in. I'm not even sure why I'm volunteering all of this to an almost complete stranger, but once I open my mouth, the words are spewing out and I can't stop them.

"Gosh, I don't know, Roman. Maybe my fiancé and best friend were having an affair. Left that shit hole of a relationship and am on my own for literally the first time ever. I'm trying to navigate and breathe through that. Move into a new apartment and things are looking up. Until I break the fucking faucet off of my shower and have the single most embarrassing moment of my life in front of the most drop-dead gorgeous specimen of a man I have ever laid eyes on. Then! It gets even better. I wake up to a fuck ton of messages and calls this morning from said ex-fiance, only to call him back and find out my best friend is dead! Yup, found her this morning sometime. So that's what's going on in my life lately, Roman. That's why I pushed past you and am an absolute bloody fucking mess right now," I finish, finally taking a second to catch my breath.

There's a look of complete horror on his face now. He's reeling for something to say and coming up empty. Because what the hell do you say back to that?! No words are going to be able to fix this shit storm that has become my life and he knows that as well as I do.

"Fuck," is his only response. He lets go of my arm to run his hand up through his hair. "That's a lot. No wonder you're a mess."

The look on my face must clue him in that he chose the wrong thing to say because he immediately starts back peddling.

"Damn it! That's not what I meant. I was just meaning that's a hell of a lot for anybody to deal with. It's no wonder you're crying and upset. Especially to be dealing with it all by yourself? I'm impressed that you're still even on your feet honestly," he tries, hoping to salvage the conversation.

The psychotic laugh returns in all its glory, finally making its way out into the world. Once it does, there's a small smile trying to come to life on Roman's face. Swiping at my eyes, I feel the slightest bit better. Like the world is a little lighter again.

"What the fuck am I going to do now? Jesus Christ. This is absolutely absurd," I start once the laugh dies down. "This kind of shit could only happen to me, I swear."

"Well. We could start by heading back to your place and grabbing a drink," he suggests. "We could talk through all this drama. Or maybe just get totally shitfaced and forget anything is even going on?"

"We? I thought I was doing incredibly well at handling all of this on my own, remember?" I joke, reaching out to push his shoulder playfully.

His tone takes on a seriousness that was missing a few moments ago. "You really are. I wasn't joking when I said I'm impressed with how you're handling it. I was only suggesting that perhaps it would be a little easier to keep standing if you had some support to lean on," he finishes, shrugging his shoulders slightly.