"I can't think of anyone who would have wanted to hurt her. Maybe it was just a weird freak thing," I suggest, knowing in my gut that isn't right. It just doesn't sit right from the second it leaves my tongue.
"Yeah, maybe," he agrees, not sounding confident in that answer either. "I'm sure the police will get it figured out. Murders don't happen here, so they've got all hands on deck, I'm sure."
"Let me know if you hear anything. I need some space," I reply, standing and dusting off the seat of my pants. "I can't be here right now. Everything is way too overwhelming." With that, I step out the door.
I slide into the driver's seat, not having a clue where to go or what to do from here. My brain is completely empty and overflowing at the same time. It's an odd sense of drowning and watching myself drown at the same time.
Before I realize it, I'm putting my car into park and climbing out at the gym. I need some space to clear my head, and this is the best place I know of for that. Putting my earbuds in place, I hit shuffle on my playlist, letting my mind run wild.
About twenty minutes into my run on the treadmill, I'm pouring sweat and starting to lose the fire that's kept me going so far. Determined to push farther, I glance up and see Roman across the gym, watching me. With an eyeroll, and a slight falter to my pace, I refocus on the run, willing myself to ignore him. That's the last fucking thing I need today.
Ten minutes later, I'm shutting down the treadmill, swiping a towel across my sweaty forehead. I'm heading for the free weights when he steps into my path, stopping me short.
"Jade," he starts with a sly smile. "Fancy seeing you here."
"I'm really not in the mood, Roman," I spit, pushing past him. Swiping at my eye, I don't even bother to stop at the weights. Instead, I head out to the parking lot.
"Hey, what the hell?" he half yells, following me out the door. "I wasn't trying to be pushy or rude! Are you okay?" There's concern in his voice, but I'm not sure if it's for me or because he thinks he overstepped a line.
My short stride is no match for his long legs and he catches up in a few seconds, wrapping his hand around my upper arm and spinning me to face him. With tears streaming down my face, I face down the man who has already seen my most embarrassing moments. How much worse could it possibly get?
"Jade? What the fuck is going on?" he pries, voice barely above a whisper. There's an edge of concern and maybe a little pain in his tone. There's also an underlying fury that feels like it could strike a match and watch the world go up in flames, but I'm doing my best to ignore that part.
"Obviously we don't know each other well at all, but I get the feeling there isn't much that makes you cry or sends you into this kind of a frenzy. What's going on?" he repeats, rubbing my arm with his thumb gently now. I don't pull away, although all the alarm bells in my head are blaring.
I do my best to stifle the psychotic laugh that is trying to bubble its way up and out of my chest. Instead, I just put on my sweetest smile and dive right in. I'm not even sure why I'm volunteering all of this to an almost complete stranger, but once I open my mouth, the words are spewing out and I can't stop them.
"Gosh, I don't know, Roman. Maybe my fiancé and best friend were having an affair. Left that shit hole of a relationship and am on my own for literally the first time ever. I'm trying to navigate and breathe through that. Move into a new apartment and things are looking up. Until I break the fucking faucet off of my shower and have the single most embarrassing moment of my life in front of the most drop-dead gorgeous specimen of a man I have ever laid eyes on. Then! It gets even better. I wake up to a fuck ton of messages and calls this morning from said ex-fiance, only to call him back and find out my best friend is dead! Yup, found her this morning sometime. So that's what's going on in my life lately, Roman. That's why I pushed past you and am an absolute bloody fucking mess right now," I finish, finally taking a second to catch my breath.
There's a look of complete horror on his face now. He's reeling for something to say and coming up empty. Because what the hell do you say back to that?! No words are going to be able to fix this shit storm that has become my life and he knows that as well as I do.
"Fuck," is his only response. He lets go of my arm to run his hand up through his hair. "That's a lot. No wonder you're a mess."
The look on my face must clue him in that he chose the wrong thing to say because he immediately starts back peddling.
"Damn it! That's not what I meant. I was just meaning that's a hell of a lot for anybody to deal with. It's no wonder you're crying and upset. Especially to be dealing with it all by yourself? I'm impressed that you're still even on your feet honestly," he tries, hoping to salvage the conversation.
The psychotic laugh returns in all its glory, finally making its way out into the world. Once it does, there's a small smile trying to come to life on Roman's face. Swiping at my eyes, I feel the slightest bit better. Like the world is a little lighter again.
"What the fuck am I going to do now? Jesus Christ. This is absolutely absurd," I start once the laugh dies down. "This kind of shit could only happen to me, I swear."
"Well. We could start by heading back to your place and grabbing a drink," he suggests. "We could talk through all this drama. Or maybe just get totally shitfaced and forget anything is even going on?"
"We? I thought I was doing incredibly well at handling all of this on my own, remember?" I joke, reaching out to push his shoulder playfully.
His tone takes on a seriousness that was missing a few moments ago. "You really are. I wasn't joking when I said I'm impressed with how you're handling it. I was only suggesting that perhaps it would be a little easier to keep standing if you had some support to lean on," he finishes, shrugging his shoulders slightly.
