Preface
Inmate Number 51793, quite the Study in Lunatirical Science- she is composed today.
She watched me peer at her through the pie-hole in the door. Her eyes are stark and blue, and they have fixated on me with a distinctly sane clarity.
Meeting her gaze- somehow the lunacy and incoherent gestures are less terrifying than this eerie lucidity.
She watches me still as I scribble my meandering thoughts. Perhaps today is the day- perhaps I will be the chosen one. I am feverish and cold sweat pools in tiny tears on my brow, I am exacerbated simply by the thought of what lies behind those cutting blue depths of the abyss. Those endless pools, when not unnaturally bright, are the darkest eternity.
How my thoughts do take a fanciful nature! And I am not in the habit of acting as a fanciful Creature. I am a Man, after all, a staid pillar of Reason and Science.
She thrusts a sheaf of papers through the door. They scatter like snowflakes to billow to the molded stone of the floor. I gather them quickly, so they are not damaged by the filth.
Then heady Realization steals over me, a phantom mist.
My eye catches the elegant and practiced lettering. The words of a Bluestocking! The words of my demented beauty-
In Her Words-
These pages are mine. All that is written here is very crux of Truth. Though I will be mad ere I am finished.
Sweet Horror. Lovely Oblivion! I hope it is finished soon- for my part in this Macabre Opera has come to its bitter end. Let it end, with me.
I don’t know where to start my account of these past months- I suppose you could say the beginning; but that has not been marked. I don’t know where it began. Did it begin with my Father? His Father? Or his Mother’s Mother? Or did it begin on that damp night in the East End? When I searched out Whitechapel to aid the Unfortunates?
I shall begin there, because that is when the Darkness that incubated inside my Sire burst to its unholy fruition.
The night had been damp- clammy. It was an unnatural warmth; sticky and changeable. It slid across everything, like a sort of dancing moss, slimy and rotted.
Oh yes, I knew all about the stories and the fear amongst those who walked those streets, trading their womanhood for a drink of the devil whiskey. I knew all about the Ripper. I also knew that he would not touch me- for I was no Unfortunate there for the taking. My virgin thighs were clamped shut so very tightly.
There was a woman; a particularly worn and used whore who approached me with a hurried desperation.
“Och- Me Lass,” she says.
I nodded to her, awaiting her plea. But it is not for money she asks.
“Come ‘wit me girl! ‘E’ll catch ye sure as that ‘e will.”
I realized that she was offering me a place to stay. I warmed by the gentleness inside her haggard old face, until she slipped her arm around my shoulder, her leathered fingertips sliding down across my breast. I pushed her from me gently.
“No, that is not for me, Old Mother.” My voice was kind.
“Better an auld cunny to lick, me girl, than the knife o’ the Ripper to stick.” she cackled.
I placed a coin in her hand and she looked at it as if it were Salvation. It could have been, if she had not been greedy.
Her name was Anne- and her mutilated body, her Death Masque- was blazoned across the simplistic black and white of the newspapers that very next day.
I approached my Father, then the dearest creature-
“Doctor,” I said, as I had called him that since my Infancy. “Are we to help in Whitechapel tonight?”
He raised his beloved graying and bushy brows at me. “Daughter,” he says, “Did you not see there was another of those Unfortunates murdered last night, her throat slit from ear to ear. It is too dangerous now.”
“Doctor,” I argue, “I am a virtuous girl, no fodder for one such as the Ripper. I was there, last night. I spoke with that very Unfortunate. I gave her coin.”
Then a look I had never seen crossed across my Father’s face.
“Then our work is for naught, and stay home you must.”
In an attempt to humor him, I placed a chaste kiss upon his weathered cheek. And when I pulled away- there was something else there, inside my Father.
“Promise me.”
In that moment- he looked again as the Leader of Men that he had once been. Before the Wasting had taken his hand. His surgery, his very life force.
“Yes, Doctor. I will stay from Whitechapel tonight.”
And I did, only to make my fate all the more horrible. I went down to the Doctor’s Laboratory.
My Father had left his tools exposed, the very meat of his trade.
The Masonic Emblem had been carefully traced in blood and different organs lay in each of the different points. The stench of the rotted entrails assaulted me, and there were distinctly feminine parts strewn about the horrific painting. There were several broken vials about the table and several small leaves that were known to me as Foxglove, or Digitalis purpurea. A stimulant- he had been working on a cure for his Wasting Sickness.