The Fertility Plague

It started as a solution to lack of fertility in pandas. Scientists encoded a bloodborne pathogen with the ability to extend the fertility window of female pandas, put male pandas in the mood, and to cause the female pandas to give birth to more young (at least 2-8 pandas per birth). It seemed like a stroke of genius at the time: the disease in question only affected pandas and was only bloodborne, or so we thought until the first patient, Rebecca Brookes came in. She was a petite redhead with a severely swollen abdomen, looking as if she was 40 weeks along with triplets. She complained of headache, backache, fever, nausea in the early morning, spontaneous lactation, hyper arousal, hyper senses, and rapid swelling of her body. When asked if she could be pregnant, she shook her head, saying that there was no way she could be pregnant, and certainly not this soon. Of course the hospital still had her take a pregnancy test, and of course it showed up positive. She denied the prognosis up until she was fully dilated and pushing out her first child.

Her second and third children were met with confused acceptance that this was happening. Once she had finished giving birth and had rested a bit, she had told a nurse something which was not believed: that her symptoms started that morning. Two days later word got around to the doctors, who diagnosed her with cryptic pregnancy, pregnancy denial, and possible pregnancy psychosis. On the third day, as they were preparing her paperwork for her to be moved to the psychiatric wing, she complained of headache, and backache. Soon her temperature jumped from 98.6 to 99 degrees Fahrenheit (37-37.22 degree Celsius). Her breasts started to swell a little more, and soon you could see her stomach, which had barely gone down from her recent birth, start to swell again as well. By the next morning, Rebecca Brookes had given birth to another two children. This cycle kept repeating for about 2 weeks and a half weeks, with her giving birth 5 times, each time with at least 2 babies and at one point, a set of quints.

She was kept under observation after that. She did not get spontaneously pregnant after those two weeks, but she was in a near constant and feral state of arousal, flirting with any men she saw in the vicinity (and even some of the women). She did not have success in her endeavor for another two weeks. By that time 5 more women came in, suffering the same fate as her. A young intern eventually fell for her charms, sending her into another two week bout of pregnancy and birth. Soon the story had unfolded: A zookeeper by the name of Jose Ferriero had gotten bitten by a horny panda. He had begun to come down with a fever, chills, and a case of impossible arousal. He had had intercourse with Rebecca, flooding her womb with sperm that kept her pregnant for two weeks. Unfortunately his ejaculation into her womb was not enough to sate him, as after she left to go to the hospital he had sex with at least 3 more women.

Thus started the strangest and most feared STI in the world: The Dagan Virus. The Dagan Virus (sometimes called Dagan-13) created a state of hyper fertility to whoever caught the disease. Those who had external genitalia came down with fever, chills, increased pheromones, hyper arousal, and increased ejaculation. If they were unable to ejaculate in a partner with a womb, they would need to masterbate at least 15-20 times daily or else their gonads would fill painfully. When their ejaculate was brought to the lab, it was determined that the semen had high numbers of sperm and excellent motility. They produced as much as 1-8 ounces of semen per ejaculation, depending on how many times they were able to cum. The sperm would spread the virus to anyone with a womb, causing pregnancy in even the most barren of them.

Those with internal genitalia came down with fever, headache, sore and swollen breasts, hyper arousal, and increased fecundity. These subjects would flirt with others until they found someone who would ejaculate in them. They could be easily impregnated even by semen that had low numbers of sperm and poor motility. They would give birth every 3 days for two weeks until the sperm had impregnated all the released eggs. Then the process would start all over again.

Neither fertility problems nor birth control was effective against Dagon-13. It would fix whatever parts of the reproductive system necessary in order to spread, meaning that even if both parties had a tubal ligation and a vasectomy, the couple would become as fertile as if those surgeries had never occurred. The only thing that could possibly stop a pregnancy from Dagon-13 were newly formulated condoms which were 10 times stronger than normal condoms, although care had to be taken when putting them on, as while they were harder to break, they could be knocked to the side by a particularly strong shot of semen. The duration of the virus and its symptoms ended around one month.

At first, cases of Dagon-13 were somewhat manageable. As it had started out as an STI, the only way to contract it was to have sex with someone who ALSO had Dagon-13 or was a carrier of Dagon-13. Quarantines played a huge part in keeping the virus under control. Most of the population was safe from it...until it started to mutate to Dagon-15. Dagon-15, the airborne version of Dagon-13, caused hyper-fertility on a level unprecedented before. Dagon 15 had been discovered at a comic book convention, turning the convention into an uncontrollable orgy before half the participants gave birth to groups of children.

Cures for Dagon-15 came out, varying in levels of effectiveness. However some part of the population found Dagon-15 desirable, even going so far as to reinfect themselves with the virus repeatedly in order to reap the benefits of hyper fertility.

I will admit, even as one who has tried their hardest to avoid infection, I can understand and empathize with the people who have purposefully sought to catch this potent virus. In terms of pandemics Dagon-15 is not the most unpleasant of them to catch. I fell victim to the virus 7 days ago, when a colleague came into the quarantine compound with a fever. Several orgies later I and my other female colleagues started the process of swelling and giving birth and a discovery was made: that many of those infected with Dagon-15 end up having orgasmic births.

I am in fact currently giving birth and am becoming increasingly distracted by how pleasant the sensations are. I will update this report after this birth and some rest.

Dr. Katherine Montero, OB-GYN.